


Freaky Friday

by fleurjaune



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Alternate Universe - Freaky Friday Fusion, Bodyswap, Denial of Feelings, Dual POV, F/M, Gabriel Agreste | Papillon | Hawk Moth Redemption, Gen, I would like to stress nothing happens with the bodyswap is in place, Identity Porn, Identity Swap, Lila Rossi Lies, Mentioned Alya Césaire and Nino Lahiffe, Mentioned Lila Rossi, Mentioned Nooroo (Miraculous Ladybug), Mentioned Plagg (Miraculous Ladybug), Minor Adrien Agreste/Marinette Dupain-Cheng, Minor Gabriel Agreste | Papillon | Hawk Moth/Nathalie Sancoeur, Nathalie Sancoeur Does Not Get Paid Enough, Nooroo is So Done (Miraculous Ladybug), Oblivious Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir, Self-Sacrifice, Self-Worth Issues, but both agrestes worry about it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-31
Updated: 2021-01-23
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:15:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 22
Words: 60,196
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28458165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fleurjaune/pseuds/fleurjaune
Summary: When Gabriel and Adrien Agreste wake up in each other's bodies they have to work together to try and keep this secret from everyone else while they find a cure. The fact that unbeknownst to each other they're also trying to make sure the other doesn't discover their alter-ego makes things a little harder.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir & Gabriel Agreste | Papillon | Hawk Moth, Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir & Gabriel Agreste | Papillon | Hawk Moth & Nathalie Sancoeur, Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Gabriel Agreste | Papillon | Hawk Moth/Nathalie Sancoeur
Comments: 460
Kudos: 312





	1. Chapter 1

It’s wrong to say Gabriel regrets his deal with Lila Rossi.

In fact the longer he spends in her company any guilt he might have about using her in his plan as Hawk Moth is completely extinguished. She’s awful. The girl takes every chance possible to cling onto him. It takes everything he has not to just shove her off him, and preferably out of his row too, but he’s currently trapped in Adrien’s body and since neither he nor his son know whether it’s actually safe to let anyone know what’s happened to them he has to act like Adrien would.

And unfortunately he thinks that shoving Lila off him isn’t the sort of thing Adrien would do given that his son seemed to allow Audrey’s daughter to hang off him all the time without complaint whenever Emilie had her over for playdates.

Besides it would probably be bad publicity for the brand. In other circumstances _he’d_ be unimpressed with Adrien if he had some sort of public physical altercation with the girl instead of just quietly doing whatever deal or blackmail is necessary to get rid of her. He likes to think Adrien would know that but unfortunately it’s only another reason why he has to just deal with her.

He doesn’t think he’s doing a good job of pretending to be Adrien. He’s sure it already looks odd how he keeps trying to pull away from her. Since Emilie’s been gone the only people he’s been in physical contact with are Adrien and Nathalie. Adrien’s his son, and Nathalie’s small gestures of comfort and reassurance offered without any expectations from him are the furthest things imaginable from Lila’s attempts at ingratiating herself with Adrien.

Some slight regret does sneak in about whether in his dealings with Lila he’s been partially responsible for inflicting this on Adrien. His son’s a very different person to him, and is the same age as the girl in question so he doubts whether he dislikes this as much as Gabriel does, but Adrien probably has enough girls after him for his fame and what he can offer them without his own father essentially giving one of them his blessing.

That unease is bolstered by the fact that it’s not as if Lila’s even that helpful in terms of keeping him informed about Adrien; the pay off from his dealings with her as Hawk Moth are far more helpful than those as Gabriel. Oh, she tells him plenty but he’s not deluded enough to not think she’s not always attempting to show herself in the best possible light. She’s a clever girl and he’s sure she’ll go far but for now he suspects Adrien’s more helpful to her than she is to him.

He tries to focus on the lesson. Biology was never his favourite class at school, and while he’s sure he was taught all of this at one point, his hazy memories of school are not currently much help at all. At least it’s not a test today. It would be beyond ironic if he was the one to ruin Adrien’s perfect test scores when he’s spent so much time and money on making sure they _are_ perfect.

Finally the bell rings for a break and for the first time ever he’s thankful for the headphones boy as he waves at him and gives him the chance to escape from Lila, quickly making his excuses.

“Dude, what happened?” Nino says when he reaches him, “I thought you were going to sit with me today, I know Lila needs help because of her tinnitus, and I basically volunteered you for that but you don’t always have to be the one to help her.”

Apparently he might end up being grateful to him for a second time in a few minutes. It really is a time for new records. “I can get away with _not_ sitting with Lila?”

The boy looks at him oddly. “Are you ok? You know Mlle. Bustier isn’t really able to stop us sitting where we want.”

That’s a sad indictment of the quality of teaching in this school. Perhaps if Adrien refuses to go back to home-schooling he could at least move him to a better school. Though he’s unfortunately attached to his classmates. Gabriel doesn’t understand why.

“Sitting next to Lila is enough to confuse anyone’s brain.” He complains.

Nino’s girlfriend sits down next to them dragging her friend along with her. “Are we going to have to hear you and Marinette complain about Lila _again_?”

This gets better and better. Or possibly worse and worse. On the upside he it sounded like he didn’t need to accept Lila’s attentions. On the other apparently Adrien didn’t like it either which _is_ unfortunate. Though apparently his son doesn’t dislike it enough to actually do anything about it.

Well. Gabriel might be able to help with that. With any luck it’ll help both of them.

“Hey,” Nino answers for him, “I know she only wants to be Adrien’s friend but I think she forgets he has other friends too sometimes. It’s fair enough if he needs some time away from her.”

“And I do have actual reasons to dislike Lila.” Marinette says with some petulance in her voice. “She almost got me expelled.”

Fantastic. Apparently in his dealings with Lila, and her claims of Marinette being a bad influence he’d got pulled into teenage girl drama. Which _should_ be useful for creating negative emotions but honestly he’d had enough of that during his own teenage years, he doesn’t need to deal with it during Adrien’s.

“Yeah, and that’s fair,” Alya says, “But everything with you and her before didn’t help with that.”

Silence falls amongst their small group, and even he doesn’t need his Miraculous to feel the awkwardness. Not that he has any idea of what Adrien would say to break it, so he leaves it to them.

Nino asks his girlfriend if she’s heard some new song and then the two of them are sharing earphones listening to it leaving him alone with Marinette.

The balance of possibilities at the moment seems to indicate she’s _not_ secretly dating Adrien the way he’d feared when he’d agreed to this little charade with his son at least but he’s still very not keen on this situation at all.

Thankfully she doesn’t seem interested in conversation either, having got out a sketchpad and starting drawing.

He leans over intrigued despite himself, when he notices she’s drawing clothes. She’s clearly untrained in formal design drawing, but the designs themselves are striking. A little out there for streetwear perhaps, but they’d pass on a haute couture catwalk where anything tends to get dialled down a bit before being put on clients, or he realises, as she sketches in a guitar next to the central male figure, as stage costumes.

Audrey may have had a point about the girl.

“They’re rather good.” He finds himself saying.

She blushes almost making him regret saying anything. “Luka asked me to come up with some new ideas for Kitty Section.”

Gabriel has no idea who Luka or Kitty Section are, but thankfully Marinette doesn’t seem to expect an answer. She frowns at the design for the guitar player and starts drawing a new jacket below.

There’s some interesting contrasting stripes on this one. It’s a pity she’s drawing in graphite pencil and he can’t see the colours. His curiosity makes him ask, “What colour’s that going to be?”

“Turquoise and black or grey probably. Sometimes I wonder if it’d be fun to put everyone in matching colours but I’m worried about clashing with everyone’s hair.”

That’s a familiar struggle whenever he imagines doing anything for Nathalie. The temptation to put her in red is always present. Not that she wouldn’t look good in red, if the colour didn’t suit her she wouldn’t have it in her hair. In fact, Nathalie in red could be devastating. It seems too obvious though.

“Clashing could work so long as you did it deliberately.” He suggests, “Though it might be hard to pick out the right colour for everyone,” and with no idea of what any of these people look like he can hardly make any suggestion.

“Do you think?” She asks. “Anyway should I be designing something for you too? Or is your dad unlikely to let you make any more one-off appearances on the keyboard?”

His first instinct is to say no. Adrien’s never asked permission to be in a band and god knows what sloppy pop music techniques he’s likely to pick it there, or what other activities he might get up too unsupervised with a group of un-vetted teenagers.

But he’s supposed to be Adrien.

And Adrien might not say no given his terrible tendency for sneaking out and terrible taste in friends. He might _want_ to join this band.

Not that he’ll let that effect his _actual_ decision, which really, he can’t make without consulting Nathalie and seeing if there’s _time_ for Adrien to even be an occasional member of this group, and if they’re any good.

If they are and they can practice somewhere supervised by Adrien’s bodyguard, well, some teenage relatability might do Adrien’s image, and therefore the brand publicity some good. Certainly there’s no harm in Adrien having another activity to distract him from Emilie’s absence and his own secrets.

“I don’t know.” He tells her. “I’ll have to ask, I do have a lot on.”

* * *

He doesn’t expect sitting next to Nino to be brilliant as he still isn’t that impressed with the boy but he does have the every important fact in his favour that he’s _not Lila._

Even better as expected Lila’s not too impressed with the situation. This plan might actually work, though he tries not to get his hopes up.

He’s sick of the failed attempts, and the constant hope that this time they’ll succeed, and he’ll have fulfilled his promise to Emilie, only for it all to clatter down again.

Sometimes he almost thinks he wants this all to be over more than he actually wants Emilie back but that’s a _terrible_ thought and he does his best to smother it.

Sometimes he thinks he’d be willing to blow the whole city, the whole _world,_ to pieces to end it all either in victory, or just _to end it all._ That’s probably a worse thought.

When lunch comes around Lila pops up again ready to complain at him. He lets her for a while, the same way he lets Audrey do the same, but when she puts her hand on his so “they can go to lunch together” it’s time to put a stop to it.

“Please let go of me.” He says.

She blinks, “Oh, Adrien I’m sorry, did I touch a bruise or something? You just had to say something, you,”

He cuts her off. “I’m saying something now. Please stop touching me at all, unless you’ve actually been asked to do so by a photographer on set. And stop trying to sit by me all the time. I need to focus on my actual work. This is highly unprofessional behaviour from you and I’m not afraid to get you thrown off a photoshoot if it continues.”

She looks about to cry. Good. “I don’t understand. I thought we were friends”

“We’re not.” As of today he’s starting to change his mind on some things. If Adrien has to pal around with emotional but ambitious girls at least Marinette’s talented at something other than lying and intrigue.

Tears are actually falling from her eyes now. It’s actually quite amusing when he can feel her emotions through his Miraculous and what she’s actually feeling is pure rage. She really is a spectacular actress. Maybe he should suggest she follows that avenue for her career.

“Why are you being so horrible?” she says.

He shrugs hoping to infuriate her more.

It works. “I’m going to tell your father about this.”

He doesn’t attempt to stifle his smirk. “Go on then.”

“He’s the one that hired me to work with you, he won’t be happy with this.”

Now that ironic but he doesn’t let his amusement distract him from what he’s supposed to be doing.

“Well, he hired me too, so he knows my contract with his company explicitly protects me from harassment on set, and I have every right to refuse to work with you at all. So If you _want_ to keep doing photoshoots with me then I’d suggest you do what I’ve asked of you.”

“Wait.” Lila says with a knowing gleam entering her eyes, “Is _this_ what you meant when we talked before? I’ve done what you asked me to do then, I don’t understand what’s prompted this now?”

Good on Adrien standing up to her before. Maybe his son _is_ more like him than he’d thought. Not that Gabriel has any idea what it was about though he’s starting to have some suspicions given the look of pure hatred Lila’s just cast Marinette.

“I’m clarifying things.” He says hoping that’s vague enough. “I hope you understand my position better now.”

She turns round on her heel and flees the room.

Perfect.

Some of the rest of Adrien’s classmates follow her, clearly intending to comfort the upset girl. He’s probably just made his son rather less popular with his class, but he’s sure Adrien will be able to win them back if he wants. Whatever the two of them may or may not have in common Adrien _is_ his mother’s son.

“Dude.” Nino says behind him and he finds him and the rest of their little group staring at him when he turns around.

“I, um, need to call my father.” He says and runs off. He can’t give Lila any time to calm down before he akumatises her.

Hopefully Nathalie will be able to absent herself from Adrien’s presence to help, but if not he’s still convinced this is an akuma that could succeed by itself.

Thank god he’d had the presence of mind to message her this morning and tell her that it was vital that she not talk to him explicitly about their ‘secret project’ today because this is definitely not how he's planning on letting Adrien find out the truth.


	2. Chapter 2

In the first struck of luck Adrien’s had all day Nathalie's gone to make them both coffee when the Akuma alert pops up.

It’s hard enough having to pretend to be his father with her, even if he’s lucky that he had been able to convince his father _not_ to tell her when he’d wanted that to be the first thing they did, but he’s no idea how he’d explain to Nathalie that he has to disappear while there’s an akuma attack without giving away why.

In retrospect maybe they should have told her to take the day off but that would have made her super suspicious given Adrien can’t remember the last time that happened and they’re trying not to be suspicious.

In fact he has no idea how he’ll explain his absence when he returns. It’s not like his father ever leaves the house. Maybe he can claim he had a fit of design inspiration and had to work in private or something. He’d text his father and ask except he doesn’t want _him_ wondering where Adrien’s disappearing to either.

That’s a problem for later though. Now he has to get to Ladybug and because _of course_ now that he’s not at school the akuma seems to originate there he really needs to hurry so she doesn’t think that he’s abandoning her.

* * *

Ladybug swings around to confront him, “Who are you and what have you done with Chat Noir?”

For a moment he _almost_ tells her the, not the truth because Plagg had confirmed his concern that he could get trapped like this if he told someone, and he is _not_ letting that happen, but that he’s Chat Noir’s father and he’s having to take his son’s place because the normal Chat Noir is injured.

It might have been nice to pretend that he and his father had the sort of relationship where that was a possibility rather than the end result of that probably being that his father would lock him in his bedroom and never let him leave it again. 

But he doesn’t want a lecture later about having let someone know his identity, and it’s going to be hard to explain why he’s fine later once they’ve fixed this, and plus he doesn’t want to throw her off by making her deal with a “new” partner in the middle of everything.

So he does go with part of the truth after all, “This is going to sound _really_ weird but it is me my lady. You've got to believe me.”

“How can I believe you?” How would _this”_ she gestured at him, “Even happen?”

As it happened he had no idea how it had either, and once again telling her was tempting because Ladybug was better with magic than he was but he _couldn’t._

“Plagg and I were trying some things?” He offered weakly. It wasn’t ridiculous. The Miraculous _did_ change the wielders appearance in more than just hairstyles, his eyes were proof of that, as were Mayura’s, and he was pretty sure she wasn’t blue in real life either.

It was one of the obstacles to his relationship with Ladybug, as it meant he had no idea if she looked anything like Ladybug when she wasn’t Ladybug. Her hair might have been longer or shorter, and she probably wore it completely differently. She might not even have blue eyes. It was even likely that she didn’t given her heritage, though Marinette showed it wasn’t impossible.

Not that he’d like Ladybug any less if she didn’t look like herself as Ladybug but it meant he might walk past her on the street every day and not recognise her.

Somehow luckily Ladybug seemed to accept this, “I don’t even want to know. At least it might confuse Hawk Moth I guess.”

“You believe me?”

“Well I do _now_ you’ve just reacted like that. I don’t think you’re a great actor Kitty.”

He managed not to retort that the viewers of the film that had been made about them might disagree.

“And I don’t know who else would chose that hairstyle.”

That had been weird. He’d caught sight of himself in a few window reflections on the way over and honestly he got why Plagg had done it that way but he didn’t think Chat Noir’s hairstyle suited his father at all.

She looks over at him again. Is this how you’re going to look when you’re older?”

“Maybe?” Adrien shrugs, he doubted it given generally people say he’s the image of his mother, but he’s hoping to get some of his father’s height eventually, and he guessed with the hair and with Chat Noir’s eyes him-in-his-father’s-body-as-Chat-Noir looked more like him-as-Chat-Noir than his father did to him-as-Adrien. That was all too complicated to explain even without the secret he was keeping though. 

She shook her head. “Not what I expected honestly.”

He’d liked to have known if she meant that in a good way or a bad way and he didn’t really know which he wanted to be true but he really hoped this wasn’t going to have adverse effects on whether she thought he actually was good looking-which he _was,_ everyone said he was.

Before he could ask she said, “Come on let’s get this akuma. It’s Lila Rossi again. Apparently Adrien Agreste gave her a well-deserved telling off.”

“He _what_?” He asks, as he ran behind her wondering what on earth his father had _done_ though at least maybe this meant Lila might have fallen out of his good books. Adrien was sympathetic to her but it was hard to be around her when he knew what she’s done to Marinette and she just had a way of making him feel uncomfortable. If somehow this weird curse meant that he didn’t have to work with Lila anymore then it might have a silver lining after all.

“Yeah it was, I mean I heard that it was really surprising. And kind of,” she hesitated, “weird.”

“I don’t know,” Adrien says glad to have someone he can admit this to who he doesn’t think will judge him, “I’ve seen some of their ad campaigns and I don’t think he likes her much.”

“Really?” Ladybug sounded interested despite herself but their attention was dragged back to the destruction being inflicted, as the akumatised Lila tore down a billboard for the Adrien perfume ad.

Adrien probably should have been more annoyed at that.

Ladybug on the other hand seemed to take it inexplicably personally though, and he noted that fact down and wondered if she lived nearby.

* * *

Mayura comes to a sudden halt when she gets in sight of them, and Adrien _does not_ get it, or why she’s not attacking. Or even manifesting a sentimonster.

“Looking for Hawkmoth?” He calls over.

“I, yes actually.” She says with confusion written all over her face, “Is he not here?”

“Why would I tell you that?”

“I’ll take that as a no.” She flicks her eyes up and down over him the same way Ladybug had, “You’re not the usual Chat Noir.”

She’s not wrong there. And honestly while he’s kind of got used to being so much taller, and he thought he was dealing fine with fighting in this body being taller than Mayura now _is_ kind of throwing him off. This is almost as weird as it was looking _downwards_ at Nathalie except it’s harder because it’s not like he’s trying to fight Nathalie.

“Maybe I’m not,” he says trying to without give anything away. _Mayura_ doesn’t need to know he is in fact still _him._

Leaping at her he decides it might actually be _easier_ fighting her in this body, and he’s just about got her trapped by a wall when her eyes suddenly widen and she goes, “Hawk Moth?!”

“What?” He yelps, jumping back from her, “Why would you, what, _do I look like Hawk Moth_?”

He really hopes that’s not the case and he doesn’t have to go back to Ladybug and say, “hey apparently Hawkmoth looks like my father but with my hair, and who knows what eyes,” especially since he has no idea how he’d hide how he’d found out that Hawkmoth looked like Gabriel Agreste.

Which was also a concern in itself which he was steadfastly ignoring for now. He’d look into that later.

She blinks, “No.” Then she says more with more certainty, “No, sorry, I don’t know what I was thinking. The height I guess.”

“ _I don’t know what you were thinking,_ if he had my Miraculous,” oops he shouldn’t have said that, “why would Hawk Moth help Ladybug and fight _you?_ ”

“To get closer to her obviously.” She answers with no hesitation at all, and apparently he can still be surprised at the lengths their enemies would go to.

“OK yeah that does kind of make sense but he wouldn’t tell you? That feels like it could go badly wrong.”

Mayura just shrugged, “Look if he’s not been here just tell me and I’ll go.”

Adrien looked at her face, and she put a good front of neutrality on, but he was used to that at home and, “You’re worried about him aren’t you? You honestly don’t know where he is.”

That must have been why she’d come up with such an odd theory. Hawk Moth mustn’t have been in his lair wherever _that_ was and she’d expected him to be at the fight and he wasn’t there either.

“If I say yes, will you let me leave?”

He glanced back at Ladybug. In the long run if something had happened to Hawk Moth it would be better to stop Mayura interfering with that. But since Lila was still akumatised he assumed Hawk Moth was ok and he might as well let Mayura go and free himself to go help Ladybug with the akuma.

“Yeah go find your husband.”

“He’s not,” Mayura cut herself off, and ran away over the rooftops.

* * *

Once they saved Lila she burst into tears, “I’m so sorry. You must think I’m terrible always being akumatised like this. It’s just he was so horrible to me, and I thought we were friends. It’s so hard having to move for my mother’s job all the time, and always having to say goodbye to people. I didn’t know people are less physically affectionate in France.”

Adrien did feel a little bit bad. He _wished_ he’d known what his father had actually done. He also felt a little bit bad that he’d be happy if this incident _did_ change how Lila acted towards him.

Ladybug bent down by Lila, “We know it’s not your fault. Just maybe try and respect people’s boundaries more in future? I hear that’s an important part of being friends.”

It sounded a little stilted but Adrien guessed she didn’t know exactly what had happened between Lila and “Adrien Agreste” either.

* * *

Adrien tries to look as nonchalant as possible he re-enters the Atelier. He thinks it must have worked because Nathalie doesn’t comment on it until he realises that Nathalie isn’t here.

He hopes she hasn’t gone looking for him.

Just as he’s starting to wonder if he should go looking for _her_ she comes in holding two fresh cups of coffee. Which is odd given he’d thought she was getting them before the akuma attack but he couldn’t really complain given how convenient her disappearance has been for him.

Nor could he blame her if she’d been watching the attack over in the kitchen. He can’t imagine his father would approve of her watching Akuma attacks on work time. He probably just engages the security system and ignores attacks when they happen.

She leaves her own mug down on her desk and comes over to him putting his in the cupholder next to his tablet screen.

“I thought you might need it.” She says.

She’s no idea how true that is. He wishes he only had his father’s problems. Instead he had to deal with Hawk Moth and Lila always seems to make a particularly hard akuma to fight. He can’t stop a sigh escaping him. “I do. Thanks Nathalie.”

Nathalie’s head tilts in sympathy. “I’m sorry sir, I know this is difficult for you, but we’ll get through it.”

This doesn’t feel like a conversation about art block or looming deadlines. Adrien’s not aware of the company being in any great difficulty but he resolves to keep a better ear out at the next event he has to go it.

Whatever Nathalie makes of his confusion she reaches out to his far shoulder, and her thumb strokes over the top of it. “You know I’m here for you.”

For a moment he thinks she’s going to lean in towards him, whatever denials his father might issue on the matter, and he just panics and pulls away from her because it’s _Nathalie_ and she’s like almost another parent to him and nope he is not dealing with this.

She releases him, without saying anything further, and she doesn’t look shocked but he can’t help but feel he’s disappointed her. As she heads back to her desk, he calls out “Nathalie?”

“Yes sir?” She replies as tonelessly as whatever moment had just passed between her and who she thought was his father hadn’t happened.

“I do know.” He says. Hopefully that sounds convincing enough given he has no idea what’s going on.

She gives a slight lopsided smile and he looks back at his computer relieved that at least he hasn’t made things awkward between her and his father.

He does think he should probably text him though, because clearly he’s not giving Adrien all the facts about his relationship with her at all.

The phone screen mocks him though. It’s difficult to know what to say, and he doesn’t want to get Nathalie in trouble either, but he needs to know so he can avoid any more situations like that.

And maybe he’s overthinking it. They’ve known each other for as long as Adrien has, and he _knows_ that there’s some level of friendship between them.

What happened, Adrien could imagine it between one of his friends and him. Like Ladybug would definitely do that. Not that that’s a good example given he and Ladybug are going to be more than friends one day. But _he_ might offer comfort to a friend like that. He can imagine reaching out to Marinette like that if she was having a bad day.

It’s probably nothing. 

He turned to look at the portrait of his mother, and wished she was back with them. It had been so much easier to talk to his father when she was around than it was now. She’d understood him, and known what to say while Adrien just always seems to say the wrong thing, and send him back to work away from him.

How long he stands there he doesn’t know. He'd asked Nathalie to tell people Ihe wasn’t available so he didn't screw up his father's business so there’s nothing to distract him

Eventually though he is startled out of it by Nathalie. “I’m sorry sir, could you just sign this.”

“I'm sorry Nathalie,” he says embarrassed, “I just miss her.”

He’s probably not doing a very good impression of his father because his words come out sounding shaky and uncertain.

But Nathalie doesn’t seem surprised by it. Instead she just says, “I know you do.”

Then she put the paper down and hugged him.

And Adrien had _no idea_ how to respond before his own body betrayed him and started crying.

It was just that no one had comforted _him_ like this.

Nathalie silently rubbed his back reassuringly, and he dared to say “Adrien misses her too.”

“I know.” Then she after a slight pause she asks “Is your message from earlier still in force?”

Adrien has _no_ idea what she’s talking about and why she’d bring it up now but if his father sent her something he assumes it was for a reason so he says, “Yes it is.”

“I see.” Nathalie says, and he’s still trying to work all of that out when she says, “I realise it's not my place to say but perhaps you should talk to Adrien about her more. This has to be difficult for him.”

He appreciates the sentiment and that she's trying but she really has chosen the least helpful time possible to say it. _He_ doesn’t need to know his father should spend more time with him. He’s already aware of that.

Trying to imitate his father his says, “I don't have the time to mollycoddle Adrien.”

“I wasn’t suggesting you did that. Just it might do him good to see you miss her too.”

“He knows that.” 

This time Nathalie doesn’t reply.

“Maybe you could talk to him?” He suggests to her, even if he realises it’s a little bit of a manipulative thing to do.

“ _Me?”_ She sounds genuinely lost as if the idea has never occurred to her, and he can’t help but wonder why when he does know that she cares for him in her own way.

“You spend more time with him than I do.” He points out.

“You didn’t hire me for my skills in comforting people sir.”

She seems to be doing fine right now, “Just do what you’re doing now.”

“...Are you saying you want me to hug Adrien?”

He backtracks a little, realising just how weird a conversation this, “You don't have to if you don't want. I’m not commanding you to. I just thought he’d appreciate it.”

“No, I mean I’m happy to do so I just didn't think you'd think it appropriate.”

He would _really_ like to know why she’d think it was appropriate to hug his father but not to hug him, but since he can’t ask that he just asks, “So you will?”

“If you’re sure. It's just. Gabriel.” She pulls away a little to look him in the eyes, and this angle continues to be _very_ weird to him, “Don't you think it would be better coming from _you?”_

“I just told you. I don't have the time.”

She let’s go of him, “I have to get back to work sir.”

He thinks there might actually be some disappointment there which is nice to know but he wishes that she’d try harder on this topic when actually talking to his father. Unless she _has_ and he’s just shut her down completely which isn’t impossible.

He looks down at the documents she’s left, and realises with some panic that he’s going to have to forge his father’s signature.


	3. Chapter 3

It turns out it’s harder to hide with akumatising someone in a school than it is back in the comfort of his own house.

At least the last time he’d hidden in toilet it had been fully enclosed. Though the one upside of being stuck in Adrien’s body is that it _has_ made it easier to hide, even if he decided that on balance he probably _couldn’t_ fit in a locker.

But he had got away with it. Even if he wishes he hadn’t heard half of what he had in from that toilet cubicle, and he’d had to detransfrom early when he got a chance leaving Lila to her own devices and he had missed watching half of the battle. He’ll have to review it later when he gets a chance.

He knows he hasn’t _won._

But that’s not new, and he wasn’t caught either, and he hasn’t had to duck through a single doorway so he’s willing to count the day as acceptable for now.

That no one seems to have noticed Adrien’s absence _is_ slightly concerning and yet another worrying indictment of this school system but he can interrogate his son about that later.

People seem to be whispering about a new Chat Noir, and once again he rues the fact he was forced to detransform before he was discovered.

* * *

Marinette Dupain-Cheng is the last person back to their class, and Nino elbows him. “Funny how it always seems to be you two going missing isn’t it?”

Dread pierces through his chest, at the idea his earlier relief that the platonic nature of her relationship with his son was premature. “ _What?_ ”

Nino raises an eyebrow at him. “ _Dude._ Calm down. I was just teasing you.”

He can’t hold his relief in. “Oh thank god.”

“Adrien?”

“I mean Marinette’s just a friend right?” He says hoping with every bit of hope he is that that is the truth because if it’s not then Adrien is grounded until adulthood for both secretly dating in the first place and then not warning him about it when this happened. Even _he_ would have warned Adrien if their situation were switched.

“Yeah,” Nino says, “Yeah, so you keep saying.”

* * *

As they put their books away Alya says, “You managed to clear it with your dad about the group project right?”

Adrien had _not_ and not without some trepidation he has to ask, “The group project?”

This can only go horrendously, he _doesn’t know_ any of this stuff and there’s no way he can pretend he does. Maybe he can pay someone to do it for him. That sounds like a great idea. He’ll just have to communicate with his project partners online only, the same way he does for much of his work, and they’ll never know that “Adrien” didn’t do the work.

Or wait. If he does it online then Adrien _can_ do it.

His satisfaction is abruptly punctured by Nino saying, “Yeah, you’re with Marinette remember.”

He and his girlfriend exchange a knowing look, and Gabriel’s dismay grows.

Looking nervous Marinette says, “You said you could come back to mine to do it?”

There is no way he’d given Adrien permission for that. He’d have to ask Nathalie what Adrien’s _actually_ supposed to be doing tonight but going over to the maybe-girlfriend’s definitely _not_ it and Gabriel is definitely not going.

“ _Tonight?_ ” comes up embarrassingly high-pitched and he’s going to blame that on Adrien’s body.

“Does that not work?” Marinette says, and he regrets not putting more effort into understanding how positive emotions come from his Miraculous, because the evidence does suggest that this girl is interested in Adrien at least, but while he can quite easily sense things like jealously, stress, and exhaustion from her, he can’t pinpoint her current emotion at all.

There’s worry, and there’s concern, and if anything he thinks that, well actually, it feels a bit like _Nathalie_ does sometimes.

Which explains this moment at least, he’s obviously messing up something pre-organised, and she’s trying to work out a way around it.

It _doesn’t_ help work out what her feelings for Adrien are.

Regardless he’s not dealing with this.

“I’m not feeling well,” he lies, “I think it’s better I go home. Maybe we could message about it instead?”

It’s probably not a good lie given he hasn’t shown any signs of not feeling well but he doubts any of them are the type to call him on it.

Disappointment comes off her in waves, and he knows he’s made the right choice. It wouldn’t be quite enough to akumatise her though so either she doesn’t feel that deeply for Adrien or she’s used to his son brushing her off.

Possibly these are things he should actually _know_ about his son, but Emilie had always been the one who dealt with Adrien’s social life.

Chloé turns round from her desk, “Hey, Dupain-Cheng. Sabrina wouldn’t mind being your partner, and I could be Adrien’s. I mean I’m actually allowed in his house so, if he doesn’t feel up to going out but can still work that’s an option.”

Gabriel is honestly considering rescinding that invitation, because right now she reminds him uncomfortably of how _Audrey_ was around whoever took her fancy. Only, _Emilie_ had been the one to invite Chloé over to play with Adrien. She’d always wanted the two of them to be friends and he doesn’t know if he has it in him to go against her wishes.

Lila, though thankfully having learnt to stay a respectful distance, is watching with glint in her eyes. “I’m sure Mlle. Bustier would understand if Adrien needed more time to complete the project and or if he needed to drop out. Maybe Marinette could join you and Sabrina’s group then if the two of you don’t mind so much?”

He’s deeply tempted to scream because _apparently_ Adrien has a bloody harem, and Gabriel hadn’t enjoyed attention being caught between teenage girls like this when he _was_ a teenager, never mind now he’s quite literally old enough to be their father. Taking advantage of teenagers volatile emotions with distance and walls dividing them is one thing. _This_ is quite another.

For the first time in his life he regrets that Adrien inherited Emilie’s good looks.

“I’m not allowed to date.” He blurts out.

“Um,” Nino says into the awkward silence that’s just been created.

The only upside is that thus far none of the girls seem angry enough for an akuma since he doesn’t have any more to spend without going back to the house. So at least he’s not missing out a chance to defeat Ladybug and Chat Noir here having wasted the akuma in his cane on Lila earlier.

“I thought. I should maybe. Say that? So no one got the wrong impression?”

Chloé’s the first of the girls to respond, “Not, like, forever though right?”

“Uh,” and technically he only needs this to hold until they fix this but he _really_ doesn’t want to deal with this, and he needs Emilie if he’s going to do so, and really it’s not like Adrien has the time anyway, so he says, “Not until I get my baccalaureate?”

Marinette was the next to speak, “Have you told Kagami that?” 

_Another one?!,_ was his first thought before he remembered that he was aware of her regard for Adrien. He’d akumatised her through it after all. And she wouldn’t have been the worst of girlfriends for Adrien. Certainly her mother wouldn’t let the two of them get into trouble.

“I’m sure your father could be convinced otherwise,” Lila suggested, “I could help you if you wanted.”

Adrien’s father really _could not_ be convinced otherwise and especially not by Lila Rossi.

“It’s fine really.” He says, “I’m not that bothered.”

“OK,” Nino says grabbing his arm, “You heard him, why don’t all of you go home and Adrien and I are going to go have some guy talk.”

Marinette takes a step forward but thankfully Alya stops her and Nino’s free to pull him out of the room. He doesn’t fight it. It seems like the best thing in the circumstances.

When they’re finally far enough away from the classroom Nino says, “Has your dad actually banned you from dating, or were you just panicking in there? Because if you really didn’t like the idea you could have just _said_ that to me. I wouldn’t have teased you or anything. I could have helped with the girls.”

Oh. The boy _does_ genuinely care for Adrien rather than just trying to hang on Adrien’s coattails to get to success. Which makes sense because Adrien is too like Emilie for anyone _not_ to like him. But it does make sense of Adrien’s hitherto inexplicable attachment from to the boy.

“My father did ban me,” only a few minutes ago but Nino doesn’t need to know that, “but honestly it’s kind of a relief, so I wasn’t lying. It really doesn’t bother me.”

It _might_ bother Adrien. But on the other hand if he’s not actually dating any of those girls or Mme. Tsurugi’s daughter he can only assume his son isn’t that interested so he doesn’t think it’ll be too out of character for his son to be unconcerned about it.

“Well if that changes let me know. Because your dad’s a total dick, and he doesn’t have the right to do that.”

“He’s my _father,_ ” he has every right to do whatever it takes to safeguard Adrien, “and he’s not a,”

“Look, I know you always defend him. And I don’t know maybe he _was_ better when your mum was around. I wasn’t there for that. But all I know is that for the entire time I’ve known you he both pays you zero attention _and_ tries to control every facet of your life which is a kind of impressive feat of bad parenting really.”

“I, _he,_ doesn’t pay me zero attention,” _Audrey_ pays her daughter zero attention, Gabriel’s busy yes, partly because he’s _trying to save Adrien’s mother’s life,_ but everything he does is to give Adrien the best. If he paid him no attention he wouldn’t organise for him to learn foreign languages, or music, _or,_ or he _does_ do more for Adrien, he must do.

“Dude, you told me how you didn’t know what you’d done that he didn’t eat dinner with you last weekend, on one of the only days of the week he even bothers to make time to eat with you. Which is crazy, by the way. His _assistant_ spends more time with you than he does.”

“He was busy,” Gabriel says weakly because he _had_ been, busy akumatising someone because he can’t let any chance go, and he doesn’t regret that because he _can’t,_ but he’ll have to tell Nathalie to make it clear to Adrien that any time he has to blow off time with his son definitely isn’t _Adrien’s_ fault. He’d never considered that Adrien might think of it that way.

“Yeah he always seems to be,” Nino says darkly, “unless he’s refusing you stuff, he seems to have plenty of time for that.”

That’s not even a fair accusation, “I get bought whatever I want.”

“You know that’s not what I meant. You’re not even allowed friends over.”

He can’t have strangers in the house. _Adrien,_ for the most part, knows where he is and isn’t allowed to go. He has no such trust in a bunch of random teenagers not to put their sticky fingers all over things, and unearth secrets that should never be exposed to the world.

And he’s not staying here for this conversation to get more accusations slung at him by someone who doesn’t know him and his family at all.

He turns around, “I’m going home.”

“Adrien.”

“I don’t want to talk about this anymore.”

* * *

He’s finally able to relax when he gets in the car. It’s bad enough dealing with this many people around without having to deal with… _that._

* * *

Nathalie opened the door to him, “Adrien, can we talk for a moment?”

“Of course.” He answers automatically even as he’s completely confused as what could have prompted this. He didn’t think he’d asked Nathalie to discuss anything with Adrien, and as far as he knew there were no issues with his schedule so unless this was about today’s group project debacle he wasn’t sure what was going on.

His apprehension only rose as she didn’t say anything more util they got to his room.

Nathalie looks down at him, and he can see the strain on her face, “You spoke to your father before school earlier didn’t you?”

“Yes.” He admitted carefully, “I did.”

In retrospect he realises that boy wasn’t completely off-base with his accusations, even if he doesn’t understand _why_ things are as they are. It would have struck Nathalie as something out of the ordinary that he’d made time for Adrien this morning and no doubt it’s made her more likely to notice anything else strange.

She confirms his suspicions, “Did he seem odd to you?”

“Not that I noticed. Why? Has something happened?”

He _really_ needs to debrief with Adrien.

“Don’t worry about it.” Nathalie says glancing back at the door, “I’m sure it’s nothing. But maybe stay out of his way today.”

“I always stay out of his way.” It’s one of Adrien’s better virtues.

“I know,” Nathalie looks down on him with an expression he’s never seen on her face before, and he suddenly wonders just what his assistant and his son say to each other when he’s not there. Adrien _has_ a mother, and that’s not Nathalie’s place to take, yet he can’t begrudge her for caring about his family either, “Things are going to get better Adrien. I promise.”

She gives his shoulder a reassuring squeeze as she says this, and despite her literally saying Adrien’s name, his eyes shut as he accepts the comfort she offers as normal. “Thank you Nathalie.”

When he opens his eyes she’s looking at him oddly.

“Nathalie?”

She frowns slightly and her hand slips to the side of his shoulder and gently pulls him towards her side. He could easily shrug it off or ignore it but he lets her, glad to have something normal to cling to, and then he literally clings to her and she stiffens under him.

He’s gone stiff too as he’s suddenly had a very unwelcome reminder that he’s _not_ in his own body, and that instead of her fitting under his arm his head is against the side of her chest, and he’s violently aware that this is _not appropriate_ at all.

Thankfully she says, “I’d better get back to work,” and he’s able to escape with his dignity intact.


	4. Chapter 4

“Ah, Nathalie.” He says when she re-enters the Atelier, “I’ve been thinking about what you said earlier. Perhaps I could finish earlier today and spend time with Adrien?”

He knows he’s screwed up at the look she startled look she casts him, and he realises he’s been too _Adrien,_ he’s asked her whether he can do something instead of _telling_ her. 

He winces as she opens her mouth and says, “Adrien’s busy with his homework sir. And you’ve got fabric deliveries to review.”

That hadn’t been what he was expecting.

He’d been terrified that maybe she’d worked it out. Instead she’s just given him a response which he’d thought was the opposite of her dynamic with his father when it comes to him. Admittedly, he knows he doesn’t know much of what goes on between his father and Nathalie in private (and is starting to think that he _really_ doesn’t want to know) but it doesn’t even fit with the conversation they’d had earlier.

Unless whatever she needs him to review _really_ is urgent. Adrien can’t really expect her to put him in front of keeping the company running he guesses.

Only he realises in horror as he opens the files she’s sent him it turns out that “review” doesn’t mean _approve_ it means _make decisions_ and he has no idea which of these his father would actually want him to choose.

He really should have been warned about this. 

“Nathalie,” she looks up, “Could you call Adrien down? I want to show him part of running a business. I’m sure it’s much more worthwhile than whatever they’re educating him at school.”

That was a much better performance, he thinks and when she stands up he assumes it’s to go get Adrien. Until she says, “What’s your interest in Adrien?”

_What._ “What do you mean? He’s my son, can’t I want to teach him about my business?”

Out of the corner of his eye he realises he’s lost the internet connection on his screen.

“Maybe,” she says, and she’s still walking towards him _why,_ “and maybe I might even allow that if you answer my next question.”

“ _Allow_ that? I think you’re forgetting your position.”

“I don’t think I am.” She reaches up and grabs his hand before he can think, “Where did you get that ring sir?”

“I’ve had it a while,” he says, but that’s _Adrien’s_ excuse not his father’s. And much as he’d been confused and glad when he woke up in his father’s body that somehow his Miraculous had switched with him he hadn’t really thought to think up excuses for it.

He hadn’t thought he’d interact with anyone enough to notice, and it’s not like Nathalie’s ever queried its appearance on _his_ finger.

“That’s funny.” She says clearly not meaning it at all, “I’ve never seen it before.”

Scrambling for a defence he says, “I haven’t worn it before. Now seriously Nathalie why are you so focused on this?”

“Why are _you_ impersonating my employer Chat Noir?”

Adrien froze in shock. Oh how he _wished_ Plagg was here so he could ask if she’d just doomed them both by somehow working out Chat Noir and his father had switched places.

“I’m not Chat Noir.” He said hoping against hope that he wasn’t trapped in his father’s body forever now, and that he could at least salvage some of this situation.

“Right, so your absence earlier and then Chat Noir turning up as an adult male of your height and build was a complete coincidence then?”

“How do you know he was my height?”

Something flickered behind Nathalie’s eyes, “I saw the video on the news.”

“Nathalie,” he tried again.

Something in his tone must have been familiar because she suddenly went, “Do I know you?”

“Yes, because you’ve worked for me for _years._ ” From a certain point of view it was even true.

“You’re not Gabriel Agreste. Your impression wasn’t bad I’ll give you that. Staring at her portrait for all that time was a masterstroke really.” Her voice is pure acid as she says it, “How long did you grill him about his wife to know to do that?”

“That was _real,_ ” he snaps, glad at least that he and his father’s reactions to that might be the same,and seeing some doubt creep into her eyes he keeps pushing, “I am him, me, however you want to say it. I’m just, filling in for Chat Noir.”

“Gabriel Agreste is filling in for Chat Noir?”

Her tone was dry enough to make the desert look like the sea, and Adrien could admit that it _did_ seem a little unlikely.

“Yes. Apparently I’ve an aptitude for destruction.”

Despite herself he could see that struck some sort of chord with her. “Humph. I’ll give you that much, but you’ll have to pardon me if I’m a little dubious. I don’t think the two of you are exactly friends.”

That admittedly would look odd and knowing he probably can’t convince her otherwise he chances it, “He’s one of Adrien’s friends.”

“What?” Nathalie said almost too quietly to be heard, and he knew he was on the right track.

“He wanted _Adrien_ to use it while he was injured. I couldn’t let that happen.”

Nathalie was staring at the ring like she was terrified of it, “No, no you couldn’t. Is that what stirred up everything about Adrien today then?”

“I suppose it reminded me of how little I know of what Adrien does these days.”

Just as he thinks he might have succeeded in convincing her “Adrien” runs into the romm, as if summoned by his name.

The real Adrien couldn’t help but glare at his father in the futile hope he won’t screw this up.

“Adrien,” Nathalie bursts out with, “What are you doing here? I messaged you to stay in your room and engage its security system until I told you otherwise.”

“You sent me _that_ and then all the internet went down, what was I supposed to think? I thought you two might be in danger.”

 _Technically_ it probably was what Adrien would have done, albeit that maybe _he_ would have turned up as Chat Noir, but the way he’d said it and was looking at them made him want to remind his father that he was supposed to be _Adrien_ right now, and that Nathalie was an adult who looked after him, and not…whatever she was to his father.

“Wait, why did the internet go down?” He asks hoping to distract her.

“I shut off external communications.” Nathalie replies.

 _They could do that?_ “Why did you do that?”

“Your message earlier. I thought the Atelier might be bugged or something.”

That did concern Adrien. She’d referred to that message before. _What exactly had his father told her?_

“Can someone tell me what’s happening?” His father asks.

He and Nathalie look at each other, and Adrien gets a sense of vertigo from being apparently on this side of their dynamic as family. 

“I was concerned by your father’s behaviour and wanted to bring it up with him.” Nathalie explains so easily that Adrien had to wonder what other times she covered for his father.

His father opened his mouth as if to say something, and Adrien shakes his head, because he’d just dodged their worst possible outcome, he wasn’t having his father mess it up now.

“Nathalie will you let me talk to Adrien now,” he asks.

“Yes sir.” She says but she doesn’t move.

“Alone.”

She still doesn’t move and holds out her hand, “ _Seriously?”_ He was gratified, really he was, that she was so protective of me but, _“_ I thought we’d resolved this.”

“I apologise if I’ve got it wrong sir, but if you _are_ you then you’d want me to protect Adrien. And I know you’d trust me with that.”

It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Nathalie. It was that he couldn’t give away his Miraculous.

“It’s not _you._ I just can’t. It’s not allowed.”

She raises her eyebrows, “Really? Aren’t you claiming it was given to you?”

“What are you two talking about?”

His father’s interjection reminded him that if Nathalie decided to stop being circumspect for “Adrien’s” sake and dropped him in it then he _really_ doubted his father was going to accept the excuse he’d offered to Nathalie.

And even if he _did_ he’d still probably confiscate the ring from him and never let him leave the house rather than let him continue on

And _that_ was assuming Nathalie didn’t change her mind further, and try to convince tell his father that he was being impersonated by Chat Noir, in which case he’d probably jump right to the correct conclusion.

Which again would end up with Adrien a virtual prisoner in his own home.

He could run but then he might end up cut off from his family and stuck in this body forever with no-where to go. That had to be a last resort.

“Nathalie seems convinced I’m not myself.” He explains hoping beyond hope that dangling the threat of her finding out would distract his father.

“Why?”

Nathalie replies before he can, “It’s complicated.”

Now his father is looking at him even more suspiciously, and he can only deal with _one_ of them at the time if he’s meant to keep both secrets, so wincing internally at how he’s likely to be interpreted he commands, “Adrien, leave the room us alone for a moment.”

His father looks like he’s about to argue then clearly thinks the better of it and stomps off.

Adrien can only hope that _he_ looks less petulant when he disagrees with his father.

Nathalie is still waiting for him to speak.

“Look,” he points out, “At the very least you believe I’m affiliated with Paris’ heroes don’t you?”

“I can believe that.” She admits but it looks like it’s being tortured out of her.

“So even if you refuse to believe I’m me, which I’m sort of offended by actually, you _can_ believe that I don’t wish Adrien any harm.”

Her lips press tightly together, and she looks utterly unconvinced. “How does that follow?”

“Why would Ladybug and Chat Noir want to hurt Adrien?”

“Why would Ladybug and Chat Noir be interested in Adrien?”

“Urgh, _Nathalie._ Look, you can access the cameras on your tablet, I don’t mind you watching us if you want to know Adrien’s safe.”

“Watching you?”

“On the security system?”

“Oh, you’re definitely _not_ Gabriel Agreste. What are you up to Chat Noir?”

“I, _what?”_

“There’s no cameras in the Atelier. M.Agreste prefers total privacy for the safety of his designs. _He_ wouldn’t forget that fact.”

_“What?”_

“So why are you here? You _can_ tell me.”

Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. “It’s complicated? And there’s magic involved? And I can’t tell you or I won’t be able to fix it.”

At his words, Nathalie’s face slowly beings to change from the, not unusual, tension to something honestly worried, and it sounds like begging when she says “Is this something M.Agreste’s done? _Please,_ leave Adrien out of it. He’s innocent. I’m sure of that.”

“It’s not something M.Agreste has _done,_ ” or so Adrien had assumed although the fact that _Nathalie_ thought it was plausible that his father had done something that might catch the heroes attention was concerning, especially given the Grimoire, and Mayura’s reaction earlier, “as much as something that’s happened. And I’m sorry, I really am,” he _really_ was, “but Adrien’s already involved.”

This time is was her term to go, “What?”

He found himself saying words he never thought he’d say while he was in the house, “Would it make you better to engage the security system?”

“What?”

“I’m not going to take Adrien anywhere. I promise. If knowing you’re locked in makes you feel better than we can do that.”

She doesn’t look any happier but some decision must be made because she says, “You can talk in the living room.”

“Are there cameras in the _living room?”_

“You’ll have to forgive me if I don’t tell you that.”

* * *

Being dragged along by himself was a novel experience, “Um, what are you,”

“No,” his fathers hisses at him, “What the hell did you _do?_ And be quiet.”

“What?” he whispers back.

“There is _no_ chance that Nathalie isn’t listening at the door.”

Adrien wasn’t sure if it made things better or worse that both Nathalie and his father were apparently ready to believe the worse of each other.

“Look, it’s not _my_ fault,” If anything Adrien would like to pin the blame on Hawkmoth and making him come out as Chat Noir but if that wasn’t possible, “really it’s yours.”

“Mine?!” his father almost spits that at him, “I’m not the one who Nathalie’s clearly noticed something is going on with.”

“Yeah well, for all I know my friends know there’s something weird with _me._ I’m not the one who got someone akumatised.”

“You _know_ about that?”

“Oh yeah, apparently Lila Rossi wasn’t quiet about it being Adrien Agreste’s cruelty that upset her enough to be a target.” He figures that’s a safe enough assumption.

“Right. No she wasn’t,” the calculating glance his father casts him is deeply weird on his face, “You don’t _like_ the way she hangs off you do you?”

“No. Why would I _like_ that?”

“Oh good.”

Not that Adrien doesn’t share his father’s relief but, “Why’s that _good?_ ”

“I may have threatened her with legal proceedings if she didn’t stop. And,” he hesitates, “She’s an intelligent girl, and she might make a useful friend, but she’s not right for you I think.”

“You,” his thoughts take a moment to catch up with his mouth he processes those sentences, “I mean, _thanks,_ I guess, but my friends definitely know something’s up now.”

His father shrugged. “Well it’s not like I know them. What was I supposed to do to trick them? I don’t understand why it was so hard for you to fool Nathalie, or how it’s my fault. _You_ knew the environment you were going into.”

Some of Adrien’s earlier annoyance raises its head, “No I don’t. You’re barely let me in the Atelier for _years._ ”

“It’s my workplace. And it’s not like you don’t know me, or Nathalie.”

“But I don’t, I don’t know you, I barely _see_ you. I thought I knew Nathalie, but _you,_ sometimes I feel like I’ve lost both parents.”

For once it seems to hit something, “Adrien I, I realise I’ve been distant, in fact I hadn’t realised quite how much I’d shut you out until today, and it must be difficult for you not understanding why,”

“No I understand why.”

“You do?”

“I know you’re grieving. But I miss her too. We could grieve together.”

“That’s,” he hesitates, “kind of you to offer, but I’m not grieving, because I know she’ll come back to us,”

“Uh, father?” He braces himself for the barrage that’s likely to come, “You know denial is a stage of grief right?”

“I’m not in denial,” he says very unconvincingly, all ideas of whispering forgotten.

“Oh this makes this whole thing with you and Nathalie weirder.”

Somehow his father dares to look lost, “What are you talking about?”

“How could _you_ not warn me about you and Nathalie?”

“What about me and Nathalie?”

“You,” he retorts, “you hug and things.”

His father pales. _“Things?”_

“She put her hand on my shoulder and told me everything was going to be ok.”

“Oh thank god, Adrien why would you petrify me like that?”

“Oh so there _is_ something.”

“No there _isn’t._ I don’t know why you keep bringing this up, it’s insulting to me, it’s insulting to your mother, and it’s insulting to Nathalie.”

“Right, so what _was_ all of that then?”

“Nathalie’s supportive. She’s, a friend, I’ll admit that much to you if it makes you happy, but that’s it.”

“Does she know that?”

“Of course she does. And you have some cheek accusing _me_ of things, when you never warned me about your haram.”

“My _what?”_ Seriously what the _hell_ happened at school today?

“Your little band of admirers.”

“Lila isn’t a band.” Adrien couldn’t help but point out.

“With Chloé Bourgeois, Marinette Dupain-Cheng and Kagami Tsurugi it is.”

“ _Kagami_ was at school?”

“No, Marinette mentioned her.”

Ok that made sense but, “Wait, what’s _Marinette_ got to do with anything? I mean I know Chloé jokes about our future together, even if it’s not really serious these days,” after all he and Chloé had played house and getting married together for years, it wasn’t a _teenage_ crush, “but Marinette’s just a friend.”

“She likes you.”

“As, wait, as _more than a friend?_ ”

She’d never given any sign of _that,_ how on earth could _his father_ of all people notice?

“It’s blatantly obvious Adrien. I don’t know how serious it is, but those other two of your friends _are_ patently trying to get the two of you together and I doubt they’d do that without her approval.”

“You think _Nino and Alya are trying to get me and Marinette together?_ ”


	5. Chapter 5

“Yes,” he tells his son impatiently and _really,_ Gabriel might have had his Miraculous to help him, but he couldn’t understand how his son could have been totally oblivious to _that_ even it was plausible that the exact feelings the girl had for him were in question.

“But, but I wasn’t even sure Marinette _liked_ me, not like she likes the others. She’s so awkward around me when she’s so confident around everyone else.”

It was starting to look like Nathalie had a point about school being good for Adrien. That they _had_ made a mistake keeping Adrien out of mainstream education so long. It had made sense to him and Emilie at the time, their fame and growing fortune could have made him a target, and he could be kept safer with them, and Emilie could take more control of his education, and Adrien could accompany Emilie she was traveling; and all of that _had_ been true when Emilie had been around. But they’d also apparently dangerously stunted their son’s social skills if he'd truly noticed _none_ of this.

“I’d say that the issue is that she doesn’t like you the way she likes the others.”

“But, I mean, _Marinette._ She’s clever, and brave, and good at everything, she could have any boy in our class, why would she not say anything?”

Adrien’s eyes beseech him and he has to point out the obvious, “How would I know? I’ve barely met the girl. But if I had to hazard a guess I think it _might_ have something to do with your fame and legions of fans.”

“You think Marinette thinks I’d turn her down?”

“I don't know. Though she might think it after today. You’re banned from dating now by the way.”

“I'm _what?_ Since _when?”_

“This afternoon.” 

Thankfully he doesn’t have to elaborate further because Adrien winces, “That probably was the right thing to say to everyone until we fix this.”

“Adrien,” and Emilie should be here for this, _this_ is her sort of thing, “Do you _want_ to date this girl?”

“Would you let me?”

In truth he’s not sure. He might have misjudged the girl but that doesn’t mean Adrien needs to date at this age. Still if he makes a production about the whole thing then perhaps Marinette Dupain-Cheng wouldn't be the worst option if she could be managed. The girl _is_ talented. And it _would_ distract Adrien from his own secrets.

“If you’re set on her, then I suppose I might allow it with certain restrictions. _Are_ you set on her?”

After all it’s not like Adrien hasn’t had plenty of times to ask her out before if he wanted to.

“I don’t know.” Adrien admits uneasily, and seeing Adrien’s expressions on _his_ face continues to be disconcerting. “Marinette’s amazing, and anyone would be lucky to date her, but I'd never considered her as something other than a friend.”

“Oh, so you’re not interested then,” he says mentally shelving the outfits he was planning to provide the girl for any appearances on Adrien’s Instagram. Pity. He's quite a few recent designs that would suit someone of her colouring.

Adrien shakes his head, “That’s not it, it’s just, I like someone else.”

“ _Another_ one?” And he doesn’t know why he’s surprised when Adrien’s hordes of fanmail make it quite clear what the teenage girls of Paris think of him.

“It doesn’t matter.” Adrien says, “ _She’s_ not interested anyway. And anyway, this isn't what we’re supposed to be talking about.”

“What girl in Paris isn’t interested in you?”

“It doesn't matter. We _need_ to talk about our situation.”

Right. _That.._ “Did you discover anything more about what happened?” he asks, without much hope. It's not like _Adrien_ knows anything about magic.

“Not yet.” His son confirms.

A more pressing issue occurs to him, “What does Nathalie know?”

Adrien looks rightfully guilty, “She's fairly convinced I'm not you. She doesn’t know I’m _me_ though.”

“That’s something. I suppose I can’t be surprised. If anyone was going to notice something up with me then it _would_ be Nathalie.” That _Nathalie_ knows about the Miraculous gives her another advantage unbeknownst to Adrien. “Who does she think you are?”

“No one in particular. Um. So do you think I should give up on trying to convince her otherwise?”

“It's probably easier,” and, there's nothing not platonic in any of Nathalie’s actions towards him, and theoretically there’s nothing inappropriate in Adrien receiving her reassurances instead of him, and yet the more he thinks on it the less he likes the idea of Nathalie interacting with anyone else thinking it's him. “Are you sure we can't just tell her what’s happened? She’d be immeasurably helpful you know.”

“I told you. If people find out what's happened we could be stuck like this.”

“But we don’t _know_ that.”

“Are you willing to risk it?”

He's not. Youth and attractiveness it might offer but he has _no_ interest in living out his life in his son’s body. “No. We need this sorted as soon as possible.”

For once he and Adrien are in total agreement. “Yes. We have to.”

 _How,_ is the greater question though, in the short term perhaps an akuma would work. _Nathalie_ would be the obvious candidate, but perhaps now _is_ the right time to admit Hawk Moth to Adrien. If his son accepted an akuma voluntarily, then he could grant him the powers to switch them back, and with Ladybug unknowing there’d be no one to reverse things back.

“Adrien,” he starts, but at the same moment his son says, “Father?”

After allowing himself some momentary annoyance, he says, “You go first.”

“It’s just. Nathalie. I think she's really worried about you. And she won’t trust _me._ Do you think she might do something?”

Trepidation grows in his stomach, given everything else she's done for him, “Yes, she likely will.”

“Is there anything I could say to stop her?”

“ _I_ can’t even stop her doing things. I can’t advise you of much. Our best chance is to fix this as quickly as possible.”

Maybe he _could_ akumatise Nathalie. If she knows Adrien isn't him then perhaps it _would_ be enough. Maybe she wouldn’t have to know who she’s swapping him back with.

Adrien looks at him oddly, “I know you don't want to hear it, but I don’t think _she_ thinks of you just as her boss. If you don’t return her feelings then I don’t think you should string her along.”

“Right,” he bites out, “I’m going to trust the judgement of someone who didn’t even notice two of his friends were trying to set him up with another, who he _also_ didn’t notice had some sort of crush in him.”

“Just because I didn’t notice it from Marinette doesn’t mean I can’t notice it from _Nathalie._ I know what Nathalie worried for me looks like and today was _not_ it.”

“She seemed pretty worried about you just now.” He says but Adrien putting Marinette and Nathalie’s names together like that occupies his mind because he _had_ recognised the same nameless emotion in Marinette he has in Nathalie, and “Would you say Marinette’s organised?”

“What?”

“Organised. Likes things in their place. Doesn’t like things not going according to plan.”

Adrien almost laughs, and the sound startles him because he can't remember the last time he _laughed,_ as opposed to cackled, “No. I mean yeah, I guess the last one, but no that's _not_ one of her good qualities.”

“Ah.” That’s. That's not good.

Adrien raises his eyebrows.

“It is. Possible. That I might have missed a change in Nathalie’s feelings, but it's nothing for you to worry about.”

“You’re not going to fire her are you?”

“What?” The thought had never crossed his mind, he _needs_ Nathalie, she’s the only one he can trust, “No, much as I'd prefer you never brought this to my attention we’re both professionals. There’s no reason this should effect our working lives. I’m sure it’ll pass.”

A whisper in the back of his mind reminds him that _Emilie_ might want him to stop working with Nathalie, but he ignores it as something to deal with after they get Emilie back. Besides it’s _Nathalie._ It's not like she’s going to throw herself at him. The poor woman would probably be mortified to know Adrien’s outed her like this.

The best thing he can do for her is pretend he doesn’t know.

For once he finds the expression on Adrien’s face easy to recognise as one he’s used to seeing on his own. Scepticism. Adrien’s looking at him like he's a junior designer trying to convince him of a new theme.

“Do you think you and Nathalie act professionally together?”

“Of course we do. What are you saying?”

Adrien’s insinuated things about him and Nathalie before and while Gabriel can concede that they have got closer on this quest to revive Emilie he's never understood how Adrien keeps jumping to there being something more going on.

Or he hadn’t. If Adrien’s noticing _Nathalie’s_ feelings then that could explain it he supposes. He can't help but pity his assistant. Much as it suits him to always have her available, it does seem a pity that she should care for him when he's sure she’d make someone else an excellent girlfriend, or indeed wife.

“I mean you _let_ her touch you apparently. That's a big thing for you. And you had her move into the house because she wasn’t feeling well. And I saw you carry her upstairs when she was asleep once.”

 _That’s because that's the least I could do when she’s literally risking her life for me and you._ He wants to snap back, but he can't say that, so instead he puts his irritation into, “Why were you even up?”

“It was early evening father.”

“I see. Look. Adrien. I'm not so unfeeling I’d let someone I've known for years suffer unnecessarily when they’re ill whatever you think of me. And Nathalie’s an attractive,” self-sacrificing, dependable, comforting, “intelligent woman whom I’m sure plenty of men would be interested in but _I'm not one of them.”_

He’s _married._ To _Adrien’s mother._ He doesn’t understand how Adrien can be so quick to forget that.

“If you say so.”

“Anything can look like something if you’re looking for it. That Nino seemed to think he had reason to think _you_ liked Marinette before the thought even crossed _your_ mind. I’m sure if I texted him asking for pictorial evidence of you two acting non-platonically he might have something.”

“Please don't do that. _Nobody_ texts like that. And also, I think,” Adrien sighs, “That I do like Marinette. I just don’t know if I like her more than this other girl. So.”

“Oh.”

A knock at the door startles them both, “Adrien, can I come in?”

The both stare at each other in panic. Adrien seems unlikely to do anything so he says, “Let her in then. Delaying won’t help. We can talk more about our actual situation later.”

Preferably once Nathalie’s gone to bed.

“Come in.” Adrien said, “We were just,”

“Talking,” she says and her face is totally neutral as she adds, “I heard.”

“How much?” He blurts out because much as he can’t understand how Nathalie can have developed feelings for him when she knows what they're fighting for, but after everything he's done he thinks that perhaps he would have tried to let her down more kindly if he’d been forced to do so instead of just ignoring the situation.

“The end of it at least.”

He's blushing. He can feel it. He hasn’t blushed for years. This _has_ to be Adrien’s body’s fault.

“Nathalie,” he starts unsure for once what he wants to say but she just shakes her head.

“I just want to clarify. So,” she points at what looks like him, “You’re Adrien, and,” she points at him, “You’re M.Agreste.”

He nods as Adrien shrieks, “You've doomed us. We’re going to be stuck like this _forever_ now.”

“You doomed yourselves. You weren’t exactly quiet. How did this happen anyway?”

“We don’t know.” He takes his chance to explain, “We just woke up like this.”

“Then, if you don't know what's going on why would you think my finding out would doom you?”

“It’s only a theory. We might be no worse off than before.”

“No,” Adrien interrupts sounding broken, “We’re _definitely_ worse off than before.”

“But how can you,” Nathalie suddenly comes to a halt, “Did your you-know-what tell you that?”

His _what?_ What kind of secrets are his son and assistant hiding from him?

Adrien nods, and Nathalie’s hand goes to the chair to support herself.

Instinctively he goes to support her in her dizzy spell, and gets another upsetting reminder of their swapped heights. Nathalie being taller than him is just _wrong,_ and it makes it far harder to hold her up.

Her eyes meet his and he wonders if she’s thinking the same thing.

Then she says, “No. No you’re _not_ stuck. Gabriel you know exactly how we can reverse it.”

“You mean?” he says knowing she’ll take his meaning. He’s not quite ready to reveal himself to his son.

“I do.”

“But Emilie.” He knows better than to assume he can do more than one thing with the combined Ladybug and Black Cat Miraculous. If he fixes himself and Adrien then he might lose his chance to save his wife forever.

“Do you want her to come back to _this?”_

That’s a very good point. He doesn’t want to imagine Emilie’s reaction on discovering he’d let _this_ happen. And it’s not as if they could re-assemble their family like this _._ They have to, well, he doesn’t know what they’re have to do. He couldn’t be her husband in their son’s body.

_But to let her die. To fail her and the promises he’s made her._

It’s a bitter choice.

“No. I don’t. Maybe we’re being too hasty though. There must be another way.”

“And if there isn’t?”

He can't meet her eyes in his shame. “Then I suppose we'll have to do it.”

There's time he supposes to get used to the idea. None of his Akumas seem to be getting them any closer.

“It might be easier than you think,” Nathalie seems to realise what she’s saying before he can correct her and corrects herself, “Not letting her go. _Never_ that. But achieving what you’re been aiming for.”

On that non-sequitur Adrien interrupts, “Um, Father? Nathalie? What are you _talking_ about?.”

“You see,” he begins but Nathalie grabs his hand stopping him in his shock.

“Sir, were you not watching the Akuma attack earlier?”

“I got called away,” he says because it's less embarrassing than having to admit he’d had to detransform to avoid being caught in the school toilets.

She blinks, and sadly he thinks she's intuited some of that, “Right. You see sir,”

Before she can finish Adrien rugby tackles her, and knocks her to the ground, and her grip on his wrist pulls him with them.

But the time, he’s regained his senses, Nathalie’s lying on the floor and Adrien’s sitting on top of her holding his hand over her mouth.

“What are you _doing?_ You could have hurt her!” he asks his son, and then realises he doesn’t know if he _has_ hurt her. And that’s aside from the fact, that even though she knows otherwise it’s _Gabriel’s_ body that’s just attacked her.

“Nathalie,” Adrien says, ignoring him, “you have to promise you won’t say anything.”

She nods as much as she can from her position, and some relief blooms in his chest at the fact she can't have hit her head that badly, if she’s conscious and moving.

Adrien releases his hand.

“Sir, Adrien’s” she manages before he clamps it back down.

“ _Nathalie,”_ Adrien sounds genuinely hurt, “You _promised.”_

In the circumstances there’s only one thing he can do, and he’s ignores any lingering distaste for the idea, and tries to push Adrien off her.

Unfortunately it turns out he’s stronger than his son, and given they’re swapped around _he’s_ the one at a disadvantage.

But it does force Adrien to take his hand from her mouth in order to fend him off and Nathalie takes her chance, “Chat Noir.”

Both he and Adrien freeze, as she clarifies, “Adrien’s Chat Noir.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Debating whether I can justify moving the romantic pairings up into the relationship tag tbh.


	6. Chapter 6

In his shock at Nathalie’s betrayal he forgets to stick to his excuse of just temporarily _covering_ for Chat Noir rather than being him. Not that it probably would have made any difference but as it is he can’t help but cry out, “How could you tell him?”

Somehow his father’s response to that is to say, “She’s _right?”_

As if in some out of character way Nathalie would have said it if she hadn't been sure.

Nathalie propped herself up with her arms to talk to them. “I had to tell him, he's your _father,_ and, and this is a good thing.”

He can’t help be be incredulous. “A _good_ thing?”

She almost smiles, “We’ve already got one Miraculous we need. We just need to get the other from Ladybug.”

“ _What?”_

“Oh,” Nathalie looks at him in surprise, “You don’t know. I’d have thought. Well I suppose it didn't matter. Do you remember that book of your father’s? About the Miraculous jewels?”

“I do,” he admits as his heart sinks to his feet.

“I’ve been studying it. With your Miraculous and the Ladybug Miraculous combined you can make a Wish to change reality. We can _fix_ this. With you, we might even just be able to ask Ladybug to help us. She’d help _you._ ”

There’s a fanatic light in her eyes and he believes that _she_ believes what she’s saying. It doesn’t fill him with hope. And what’s more, is the fact that in some ways she's not wrong, he's not sure if he’d be strong enough to resist temptation if this is the only way to fix them.

But, “We can’t though.”

“ _Why?”_

“I know you probably don’t know but. Nathalie. There’s a cost to the wish.”

“Then we’ll pay it.” She says confidently.

“You don't understand. It's not a _monetary_ cost. It takes an equal exchange.”

“So?” his father says, “Let this be someone else’s problem.”

Adrien looks at him in horror, that he could _say_ that and sound so unbothered. “You can’t just do this to someone else? What is _wrong_ with you?”

“What’s wrong with _me?_ Chat Noir, you’re,”

“Stop.” Nathalie interrupts them, “Adrien, you think that if we used the Wish to swap you two back then it would swap two other people around?”

“Yes! Exactly.”

“Then,” she suddenly looked uncertain as she looked to his father, “maybe we _could_ achieve what you wanted sir. Sort of.”

“What?” his father was the one to say it but Adrien felt equally lost.

“If we made the Wish to _deliberately_ swap one pair for another then would that work?”

“I don't know. Maybe.” It might. Trading one swap for another _would_ be equal surely, “but who are you thinking of? Like identical twins or something, so people wouldn’t notice”

“What if, as the price for swapping you two into the right body, you swapped me and Mme.Agreste?”

“What?” they were in chorus this time.

Adrien couldn’t believe he’d correctly heard that. They didn’t even know where his mother was. He’d been assuming she was probably _dead._ He doubted that you could even swap with a dead person, and even if you could, or even if she wasn’t but was in some other sort of danger he couldn’t understand what on earth would possess Nathalie to suggest _that._

That was a _horrible_ idea _._

Nathalie didn’t seem to understand the issue, replying “I know it's not what you want, I mean it’d still be _my_ body which I realise is a problem, and I’m sure it’d make things awkward for you with the press but you’d have her back.”

“But,” his father says, “Nathalie. You'd be,”

He doesn’t finish his sentence as if unable to say it and Adrien couldn’t blame him. He doesn’t think _he_ could say it and of the two of them he’s the _better_ of them at dealing with losing people.

“We always knew that was a likely outcome.” Nathalie says.

“Did we?” his father replies in a tone that very much suggests he did _not._

“I didn’t.” Adrien points out, “I have _no_ idea what on earth the two of you are talking about, and I’m really cross at you Nathalie for betraying me like that, but that doesn’t mean I want you to _die_ to make up for it.”

He had been about to get off her, because it was a really weird position to be in, but honestly if these were Nathalie’s decision making skills then maybe he shouldn’t release her and let her do... whatever it was she planned to do.

“It was only an idea.” She tries to defend herself.

“Was it?” his father replies sounding rather bitter, “Because it rather sounded to me like something you’ve thinking about for a while.”

He was sure his father knew Nathalie better than him but, “you think Nathalie’s been planning for what to do if somehow we woke up in each other’s bodies for a while?”

“No. I think apparently Nathalie’s been thinking about dying for your mother for a while.”

“You don’t have to sound so accusative.” She says, “I’m trying to _help_ you.”

“I don’t _want_ you to help me like that. Why would you even _think_ that?”

“Look, I realise that it’s not an ideal solution. Obviously her being in my body would be an issue given you’re not attracted to me but have you got a _better_ one? It’s not like Adrien would let you swap her for Amélie and we can’t leave the two of you as you are. With the circumstances we’re in it seems like the neatest solution. “

“What is _wrong_ with you? That's not the issue at all I,” His father looked about to move for a second, then on catching Adrien out of the corner of his eye, clearly thought better of it. “ _Look._ I would happily sacrifice Amélie because I hate her. I'm not sacrificing _you._ ”

“Um,” Adrien interrupts with a very vital point, “We’re not sacrificing _anyone._ ”

“But what if it's the only option?” Nathalie asks.

“It’s not.” Plagg suddenly appeared, and Adrien realised that since they already knew who he was his Kwami _could_ do that now. “You’re not stuck like this.”

“ _What?_ But you told me we would be if everyone found out.”

“I lied.”

Today was turning out to be betrayal after betrayal, first Nathalie, now Plagg, and he couldn’t understand “ _Why?”_

“Because I _thought_ it'd make you and your father work together. Apparently I overestimated him.”

“Did you do this to us then?” his father asks.

Sighing, Plagg called out, “Nooroo come out.”

“ _You.”_ His father spits out with a venom Adrien’s never heard in his own voice, at a purple butterfly Kwami that appeared from behind him, “You did this.”

Trembling the Kwami says, “Master I only wanted to help the two of you.”

“How did this _help?”_ His father complains at the Kwami.

The small purple butterfly Kwami. _The butterfly Kwami._ The butterfly Kwami who knew his father.

“You’re Hawk Moth.”

That feels like it should count towards the list of today’s betrayals. Adrien’s not sure how it could get worse.

“Yes,” his father grimaces, “This wasn’t exactly how I meant to tell you.”

“You were going to tell me?!” He asks incredulous, “ _When_ exactly? When you’d destroyed Paris completely?”

“I wasn’t going to destroy Paris completely.” He tilts his heads, and corrects himself, “Or not deliberately anyway, and besides I wouldn't have had to, not if you weren't fighting me. I can’t believe you’ve been disobeying me this whole time.”

“Technically you never say I couldn’t be Chat Noir.” Adrien points out, and he probably should have had a better response but he’s still _reeling_ and, “And this, _this,_ is your fault.”

“Adrien none of _this_ mess was my idea.”

“No, I mean you akumatised Lila while we were swapped. Oh my god, my friends could have caught you, they could have thought I was Hawk Moth, I’d lose all of them, I’d have gone to jail.”

“Adrien. Calm down. We wouldn’t have let that happen.”

“But still, that was, that was _so_ dangerous. And that’s how Nathalie worked it out because _I_ had to go as Chat Noir and I still looked like you.”

His father blinked at him, “You did? I had to detransform before you turned out. How did that, you, I look like?”

Slightly wrong-footed by the question Adrien has nothing better to offer than, “Um.”

“It wasn’t a good look sir.” Nathalie offers into the silence, “The costume itself, which was Adrien’s usual, was fine but I, well, if you were to transform again I’d advise asking for a different hairstyle.”

“Hey,” Plagg says, “I was transforming the kid. I was going for _him_ as Chat Noir, not whatever Paris’ Worst Father over there would have chosen.”

“I’m _not_ Paris’ Worst Father.”

“Really?”

“Yes.” His father snaps.

Plagg reclines lazily, “What evidence do you have for that?”

“I’m. I’ve.” His father frowned then declared triumphantly, “I’ve never hit Adrien.”

“Admittedly things are a bit fuzzy when I’m transformed but I think at least you threw him off the Arc de Triomphe,” retorts Plagg.

Nathalie made a horrified noise as if she could have possibly not known that. Or. He realised maybe it was _actually_ the horror realising she’d seen his father send him flying to save _her,_ because really if his father was Hawk Moth then there was only one candidate to be Mayura and she was with them right now.

“I didn’t. Know. Adrien. Was. Chat Noir.”

“And would that have changed things?”

“Of course it would changed things.”

“Really?” Adrien asks wishing beyond hope that he could believe what his father was saying.

“Yes. You should have _told_ me. I can’t believe that you went out without permission to play superhero. Jumping over rooftops, and fraternising with Ladybug, and thwarting me from saving your mother.”

Adrien felt sick, “That's, _that’s_ why you’re doing this?”

“Yes, it’s not like I need the Miraculous to get money or power. This was all for _her._ For _us._ So we could be a proper family again.”

“But, you never _said_ anything.”

“You’re right. I should have told you, then we could have got her back long ago, but it’s alright Adrien. I’ll forgive you for not telling me, if you forgive me for not telling you. We can still save her.”

“What?”

“Nathalie was right. You have your ring. Ladybug trusts you. Together we can get her earrings and bring your mother back to us.”

“But we _can’t._ ”

“What?”

“You literally just told Nathalie we weren’t doing that.”

“He didn’t.” Nathalie interrupts, “When I asked about if that was the only option, he never got a chance to answer. Your Kwami intervened.”

“It can’t be the only option,” says his father, “we wouldn’t be using it for a swap this time if the Kwamis are telling the truth about there being another way. We’d just be doing it to bring back Emilie.”

“And the Wish still needs an exchange.”

“Yes, but it wouldn’t need to be _you._ ”

“Who else is it going to be? _You?_ We can’t let it be Adrien.”

His father looked between her and Adrien, “We don’t know it’d be someone close to me.”

“We don’t know it _wouldn’t_ be. Let _me_ make the Wish Gabriel. Let me make sure the price is only me.”

“ _Only_ you? Nathalie I don’t like this sudden death-wish of yours, stop it now.”

Adrien had to speak, “No one is making the Wish. Not you. Not Nathalie. _No one._ I’m not betraying Ladybug, and we’re not killing _anyone._ ”

His father stood up, “Adrien give me that ring _now._ ”

He climbed off Nathalie, and stood up backing away from his father, “No, Plagg claws out,” he calls in desperation ready to jump out the window and throw himself on Ladybug’s mercy if need be.

“Nooroo, dark wings rise.” His father copies him, and even in this situation he can’t help but recoil a bit more at the sight of _him_ as Hawk Moth, silver cowl and all.

“Oh for,” Nathalie followed them to standing, “Duusu spread my feathers.”

To Adrien’s shock Mayura took a position between the two of them, facing his father, who looked equally thrown by this intervention, “Sir. _Gabriel._ What are you _doing?_ ”

“I’m confiscating that ring from Adrien the way I should have when it first turned up on his finger.”

“What?” She says in clear disbelief, “Are you going to fight him for it? It’s _Adrien._ Isn’t it bad enough to know what we’ve already done to him? Surely you can’t attack him now you _know?_ ”

A flicker of doubt passes through his father’s eyes but then he says, “If he was a dutiful son he’d give it to me.”

“Gabriel I can’t let you. You’d regret it.”

“So you’re willing to die for me if you get that ring, but you’re not willing to do what you have to get it?”

Adrien was transfixed by the situation even though he knew he should just run.

“Yes.”

His father exhales, and then, “Dark Wings fall.”

He looks up at the two of them. “Emilie would be furious with me if she saw this wouldn’t she?”

Nathalie nods, “She would be sir.”

Then copying his example she de-transforms leaving Chat Noir the only person still his alter-ego.

They both look at him in question.

“Am I supposed to _trust_ you now? I don’t even know what made Father stop, and I’m sorry Nathalie but I don’t trust _you_ not to take the ring if you thought you could do it without me noticing.”

“You’re probably right there,” his father says ruefully, “If you can believe it I actually tried to stop her using the Peacock Miraculous.”

“Sir,” Nathalie jaw dropped, “That is _not_ a helpful thing to say.”

Ignoring that Adrien replies to his father, “Yeah, so I would prefer if she _didn’t_ steal my Miraculous and then try and kill herself with it so forgive me if I don’t transform.”

“Much as the former would please me, I don’t like the latter either.” His father looked considering, “We could handcuff her to a bed or something I suppose.”

“ _Sir._ That is not an appropriate thing to say to your employee in her workplace.”

Despite his blush, his father’s reply came in a steady voice. “I think we went past that a long time ago Nathalie. But I suppose we could tie you to your desk if you prefer.”

“Yes, I’m sure that breaks so many less employment laws.”

“We wouldn’t have to if we, _I,_ could trust you.” Adrien tells her, _Can we trust you?_

If she sees the question in his eyes she doesn’t answer that, “I’m only trying to be helpful. No one in this house appreciates what I do.”

“I appreciate you plenty when you’re not volunteering to die.” His father says, “If you feel undercompensated we could raise your salary.”

Adrien can sympathise with her eye-roll, “He’s not very good at the parts of relationships that don’t include spending money.”

His bedroom is a testament to that.

“You’re not wrong. But none of this is relevant right now,” Nathalie says

“Isn’t it?” Adrien asks, “I can’t trust either of you anymore can I? I should just go.”

“No,” his father yells, then more quietly he adds, “You can’t. I can’t lose you _too._ ”

“You’re never acted like that though.”

“Look,” Nathalie intervenes, “Today has been a lot to take in. For all of us. I realise that. And I don’t know what we’re all going to do long term. But the priority _has_ to be fixing you. Can’t you two see _that_? Can’t we have a truce or something?”

“A truce until we solve this?”

“Yes.”

He _wanted_ to believe her but Nathalie had already broken his trust once. Even if she’d followed that up by defending him it didn’t cancel out. And there was another person involved, “Father?”

“I’m willing if you are. It seems like this was your Kwami and mine working together. It makes sense _we’d_ have to work together to fix it.”

“Besides,” Nathalie said, “I don’t think you want to go out as mini-Hawk Moth. It’s not a very threatening look.”

“What? _Why_ isn’t it? Adrien goes out as Chat Noir all the time and he looks plenty threatening.”

 _Was_ he? Adrien was interested despite himself. “Do you think? I don’t think threatening is very heroic, but then my Miraculous _is_ the force of destruction so I guess that’s fitting.”

“Adrien looks,” Nathalie considered, “ _Cool_ as Chat Noir, there’s a reason we’ve let him be affiliated with the hero. You just looked adorable. Like a child playing dress-up.”

That was kind of gratifying. Even if he should be able to pull off any outfit. Still he didn’t think purple was his colour. “It did look a bit silly. I don’t think I’m going to go for a full cowl anytime soon.” Or a suit.

“I think both of you are just biased because you’re used to seeing my normal transformation. There’s nothing wrong with Hawk Moth’s costume. And we’re getting off topic. Adrien _will_ you detransform so we can talk to your Kwami.”

Adrien sighs, “Claws in. Look I don’t trust you. I _can’t_ trust you. But I want to hear what Plagg and Nooroo have to say.

He dug out some camembert and gave it to Plagg.

“Finally.” Plagg exclaims, “Nooroo?”

“Plagg and I met quite accidentally one night in the kitchen.”

“You’re not allowed to go that far away from me,” his father snapped.

“You’d fallen asleep at the table when you’d gone to get yourself more coffee master.”

“Oh.”

“And he’s visited when you were sleeping since. Adrien doesn’t force _him_ to be stuck so close by.”

“That’s because my kid isn’t a prick.”

“And on certain occasions, when the stars, and other forces are in the right places, Kwami’s can do things we usually can’t. So when an opportunity to swap the bodies of our wielders came up we took it.”

A blue Kwami suddenly appeared, from, actually it looked like it had been hiding in Nathalie’s _bun._

“I wanted to swap with someone too, but Plagg wouldn’t convince Ladybug’s Kwami to come here to meet me.”

“I told you Duusu. Tikki didn’t think it was a good idea. And it wouldn’t benefit your wielder or hers.”

“Has does this benefit _us?_ ” his father asks.

“To break it the elder of you has to perform an act of selfless love for the other.” Nooroo explained.

Adrien could only stare at his father in horror.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm honestly not sure if a Nathalie-Marinette instead swap would have better b/c they're more competent or worse because of their tendency to do stupid things around their respective Agreste. If they all swap I guess it depends on when they work it out about the other pair XD


	7. Chapter 7

For years now Gabriel’s been used to respect from people. Oh, there have always be detectors and people have said some absolutely foul things about Emilie’s disappearance but generally, people respect his achievements at least even if they don't like _him._

And respect is what he's always demanded from his staff.

From his _son._

Right now both Nathalie and Adrien are looking at him in a way that suggests they have no faith in him at _all._

And Adrien’s expression, much as he'd like to, he can't pretend is completely a surprise. Today has been a shock for him, much as it had been a shock for Gabriel when he'd discovered what was happening to Emilie back then. None of how this came out has exactly been ideal. He can’t fault him for not having faith in _anything_ right now.

And from what _Adrien_ had said earlier. From what Adrien’s friend had said earlier it sounds like he's been losing his son for longer than he’d realised. Hawk Moth has cut into his work time, pushing his work time into what should be his free time, by which point he has no energy for interaction even if Adrien _had_ still been up. He hadn't been blind to that.

He just hadn’t considered that Adrien would be so effected by it. Emilie had always been the one to spend the more time with their son. She’d had the time and she’d been _better_ at it. Getting her back for Adrien had seemed like more of a priority than trying to take her place with him, when he and his son had never had a close relationship anyway.

But what's done is done, and perhaps he can use this knowledge to fix their situation. To break this spell or whatever exactly the Kwami’s have done he has to prove his love for his son somehow, and giving him what he wants seems like a good place to start.

Though their very situation makes that difficult. 

Usually he might ask _Nathalie’s_ advice. _She_ knows Adrien better than him. But she too looks like what the Kwamis have said is a life sentence, and that cuts him to the quick. Earlier she'd been willing to sacrifice herself for him, and now she doesn’t seem to believe he’s capable of being selfless for his son’s sake and he just didn't know how to reconcile those two things.

He can't understand why she’d die for someone she thinks so little of.

He can't understand why she’d die for him at all.

Adrien may have seen what he’d missed about her feelings but he can’t accept that they run that deep. He _should have felt it_ if they did.

And surely if Nathalie, if she, it’s a struggle even to put it into words in his head never mind out loud, but if Nathalie was in love with him then surely she’d _say_ something, try to convince him of the idea, or something, not just try to die without him ever knowing why.

But then, Nathalie _has_ been killing herself for him since she put the Peacock Miraculous on. Perhaps she thinks she’s already doomed. Perhaps she’s been thinking that ever since that first time.

Right now he can’t see what the point of have a blasted Miraculous that senses emotions if apparently he’s completely missed the feelings of the two people closest to him in the world.

“We should get dinner.” Nathalie says breaking his train of thought, “I think our brains need fuel if we’re going to work this one out.”

He doesn’t feel like eating _at all_ but apparently he’s the only one.

“Finally she says something sensible,” Adrien’s Kwami says, “I hope there’s more camembert in the fridge.”

“And coffee for me?” Duusu trills.

“And coffee for you and me.” Nathalie confirms, “Gabriel do you want coffee while we wait?”

He nods, “My usual please.”

“Oh.” Nathalie says, “I’m not much that’s such a good idea when you’re in that body sir. I don’t think Adrien has your caffeine tolerance.”

This day can only keep getting worse, and if he didn’t worry it might trap them like this for longer he’d wipe that smirk Adrien’s giving him off his face.

“Can I have a coffee?” Adrien says.

“No.” Nathalie says, “It’s too late for you.”

“Not in _this_ body though.”

Nathalie looks between them, “I think I’m just going to treat you both like you’re Adrien. That seems like the safest course of action.”

“I’m an _adult._ ” He retorts, “You can’t treat me like a child. _I’m in charge._ ”

“Hmm. I’ll take that under consideration sir.”

It had taken him years to realise it, in fact he hadn’t really until she’d stolen the Peacock Miraculous back, but he suspects that’s Nathalie’s tone when she pretends to agree with what he’s saying and then goes off and does what she thinks is the right thing anyway.

Annoyingly, also until she’d stolen the Peacock Miraculous, it’s never seemed to have any ill effects.

“Do you have a kwami-sized cup, or how does Duusu drinking coffee _work_?” Adrien asks.

“Come and see,” Nathalie says and he watches his son follow her out of the room.

Once they’re gone he lets his head fall into his hands.

He has no idea how to fix himself and son in multiple different ways, and no idea how to somehow save both his wife and his assistant at the same time.

“Master?”

He glares at Nooroo.

“It’s going to be ok,” his kwami says, “I’d not have agreed with Plagg to try it if I didn’t think you could do it.”

“I don’t know who exactly you think has been in charge of you all this time but I don’t think he sounds much like me.”

“You love. I can tell that.”

He does. Not widely. But he loves Emilie. He’s knows that. The gaping hole in his chest since he lost her is proof of that. And for all he’s a mystery to him, and he has no idea what to do with him, he does love Adrien.

But he doesn’t know that he loves _selflessly._

It was never selfless to love Emilie. Loving her brought her and her brightness and _her_ love into his life. It was a reciprocal arrangement.

And loving his son is to love his own legacy, and Emilie’s legacy.

There’s nothing selfless about it.

“I don’t know if that will be enough.” He tells Nooroo.

* * *

None of the humans at the table seem much interested in their dinner. They’re all picking around the food rather than really eating.

“How does this work anyway?” Nathalie asks the kwamis, “Can anything he does truly be counted as selfless now that you’ve told him that doing that will break this spell?”

“Should still work,” the cat kwami says while somehow getting across the full sense of a shrug without actually shrugging.

“If it’s truly _for_ Adrien then his awareness of the situation won’t prevent it working.” Nooroo confirms.

That’s something. Only he doesn’t understand how he _can_ do anything that’s truly for Adrien now. There are circumstances where he could see how it could be more for Adrien than to fix this. If he took a bullet for his son. Or if he pushed him out of the way of car and got hit himself. But they’re not exactly _likely_ situations.

And he’s fairly certain saving Adrien from an akuma _he’s_ created wouldn’t count.

The only option is to go back to his first idea, “What do you want Adrien?”

His son looks at him rather gormlessly, “What do I _want?”_

“It has to be something _for you_ doesn’t it? So what do you want that you don’t think I’d usually give you?”

“Oh.” Adrien’s eyes widen, “Oh, um.”

“You can think about it if you don’t know.” If only it could be something he could buy, but he doesn’t think he’s ever been stingy with _that_ with Adrien.

“No, I mean, there’s lots of things. I want to spend time together, and I want to be able to have my friends over to the house, and I want more free time, and I want us to have a family holiday, and I want to leave the house more,”

“Alright.” He cuts Adrien off because _surely_ that has to be enough.

Nothing changes.

“I think you actually have to do something sir.” Nathalie suggests, clearly catching his dismay.

“How can we do any of that when we’re stuck like _this_?”

“I could review Adrien’s schedule. Perhaps if we reduced his photoshoots that would free up some time. And perhaps we could do something similar to yours, or I don’t know find something you could do together.”

“Like _what?_ ”

“You could arrange to go to one of his fencing matches maybe. And I could certainly _book_ a holiday for you two for the future.”

“If I have to go on holiday then you have to too.”

“For the three of us then. And we could organise time with his friends in the future, say his birthday.”

“Yes, yes, do all of that Nathalie.”

“I don’t know that’ll work.” Adrien says, “I mean I _want_ all of that, I really do, and I hope we can do it but what I really want is for you to give up being Hawk Moth.”

In his shock he feels like he can’t breathe.

That Adrien would say that.

That Adrien would make him watch _himself_ say that.

He forces the words out through his throat. “How can you say that?”

“How can I _not_ say that?”

“Don’t you _want_ your mother back?”

“Of course I want my mother back, but not like this. Not when it means fighting my own father, not at the cost of Nathalie, or at the cost of _anyone_. If she could walk in that door right now fit and well then _yes,_ I would want that, but I _don’t_ want to change the universe to make that happen. How can you do everything you do to Paris and look at yourself in the mirror everyday?”

“Quite easily.”

“You _hurt_ people.”

“Not permanently.”

“Maybe not physically, but _emotionally._ How can you?”

The answer’s simple, “Because I’d do anything for her. I can’t just abandon her.”

“Father,” Adrien looks about to cry, “You _can._ What you’re doing, nobody could reasonably expect you to do it. You’re not failing her if you stop terrorising Paris.”

“Every day I don’t get your ring and those earrings I’m failing her.”

Adrien gets up and shoves his chair in, “I can’t trust you at all.”

“Adrien,” he tries to call him back but it doesn’t have the same force in his son’s voice it has in his own and Adrien ignores him.

Nathalie watches Adrien go, and then looks back at you in concern, “I’ll be back,” she says putting a reassuring hand on his shoulder before running after his son.

* * *

She comes back alone.

“Where’s Adrien?”

“He’s staying the night in a hotel. I gave him your credit card, and got his bodyguard to drive him. He didn’t trust me to book it.”

“Is that a good idea?”

“He doesn’t trust us enough to stay here, and we could hardly send him to one of his friends looking like he's _you_.”

“No, I suppose not but,”

“He’ll come back Gabriel. He still has questions. And he needs you if he’s going to get his own body back.”

She’s right. He just doesn’t know that Adrien would come back if their conundrum _didn’t_ unite them.

“I don’t understand how he can let her go so easily.”

“He’s been letting her go since she disappeared. It’s not the same for him.”

“We should have told him before now.”

“I’d have agreed before,” Nathalie sighs, “Now that I know he’s Chat Noir? I don’t know. I don’t know what he would have done.”

“You think he’d have told Ladybug.”

“I can’t say. But it would have been difficult for him, fighting _you,_ watching you fight the girl he loves.”

“You think he _loves_ Ladybug?” Is _that_ why he won’t agree to have Emilie back? Does he think some teenage crush is equivalent to his mother?

“You’ve seen his Ladybug collection. I thought it was a celebrity crush. I thought it was funny to have him be at that end of it for once. But if he’s Chat Noir, then I suppose it starts to look a little different.”

She might be right. Perhaps he’s being unfair to Adrien. Ladybug might be _his_ Emilie. That leaves them at an impasse though.

“We’re quite a pair aren’t we? Father and son fighting on the behalf of the women we love.”

Nathalie doesn’t reply immediately and he remembers Adrien’s friend and the thought strikes him that they also both have someone close by that cares too much for them without anything in return as well. Though he doubts Adrien’s treated Marinette anywhere as badly as he’s treated Nathalie, or that she’s had to steal a Miraculous to save Chat Noir from a situation he’s got himself into.

Though maybe it’s not so similar. Adrien thinks that he does have feelings for Marinette. That they’re just not equal to those for this other girl. Who given what he knows now he assumes must be Ladybug.

What a mess.

“He never thought that we were at equal risk of him stealing our Miraculous you know,” Nathalie says, as if she’s just realised it, “I’m not sure _how_ given where he grew up but I don’t think it even occurred to him.”

“Adrien likes to be the hero I think. I suppose he might not think that sort of subterfuge is very heroic. Not that he had any issues sneaking out as Chat Noir.”

She looks startled at his comment.

“I do listen to what you report to me about him you know.” If the Ladybug idolising wasn’t a clue enough, then there’s all the anime he orders about people fighting forces of evil.

“I’m glad I’m not talking to myself when I do then.”

That catches his attention. “Does it feel like that sometimes?”

“Sometimes.” She admits.

If even _Nathalie_ doubts his regard for Adrien then, “I think I’ve gone wrong with him somewhere.”

“There’s still time to fix it. Otherwise the kwamis wouldn’t have done this.”

“No. I suppose they wouldn’t want to punish _him._ ”

She’s frowning at him, and he wishes that for once he could make her _smile,_ instead of pouring more stress onto her. Her smirks as Mayura don’t count.

“Nathalie, what you said earlier.”

She stiffens, “yes?”

“About swapping you and Emilie in return for me and Adrien, you seemed to think I’d have an issue with my wife looking like you.”

“Wouldn’t you?”

“Yes, but for how revolting the idea is that I’d use your body as some sort of host for Emilie and let you die, not because of any flaws in your appearance. I wanted you to know that. You’re very,”

“Stop,” Nathalie holds her hand out, “I appreciate it Gabriel I really do, but I think you need to think about whether I really want to hear what you’re about to say from _Adrien’s_ mouth.”

He clamps his mouth shut.

“I thought so.”

There’s something Adrien _would_ say though, “Neither I or Adrien want you to sacrifice yourself.”

“I” she hesitates, “realise that now.”

“I don’t know how you didn’t before.”

“I didn’t think either of you would _like_ the idea, but if it comes down to it then, I’m not Adrien’s mother, I’m not your wife, between me and Emilie it seems like an easy choice.”

The sinking feeling in his stomach makes him think that maybe he was wrong about thinking his feelings were so dissimilar to his sons.

Yet for some reason he doesn’t stop talking, “I don’t understand why _you’d_ do it though. You’ve got so much life ahead of you still. Why put your determination towards this?”

She looks away from him. “I’m tired Gabriel. I just want all of this to be over. To not to be juggling all of this, and not suffering from using that Miraculous. And I want you-and Adrien, to be happy.”

The latter seems unlikely now, but, “But why do this for me? Why _stay_?”

“Does it matter?”

“Adrien thinks you have feelings for me.”

“Oh god. _Adrien_ said that?”

“Do you?”

She shuts her eyes and exhales, “I’m not having this conversation with Adrien’s face. Let’s sort out this mess first.”

She gets up, he assumes to go to bed. “Nathalie?”

She turns back.

“It wouldn’t have been. An easy choice.”

She gives him a weak smile and leaves him alone with his thoughts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well this one was a little bit more downbeat but we'll get some more fun in next chapter hopefully :)


	8. Chapter 8

Adrien’s woken by _Plagg_ which given his kwami’s laziness he feels _just should not happen._

“Don’t you have _enough_ camembert already?” he groans still half-asleep.

“Never. But also don’t you usually care about getting to school at this time?”

 _That_ does wake Adrien up until he realises _where_ he is and _whose_ body he’s in. “It’s not like I can go to school like _this_ is it?”

“Probably not a good idea, but don’t you want to know if _he’s_ going to?”

Right now his father is about the last person he wants to see in the world but, “Yeah I guess.”

Letting his father attend school in his place had been one thing, even if he _had_ worried about him offending all his friends. Letting _Hawk Moth_ spend the day with a bunch of his victims feels very different.

“Did you know?”

“Know what?”

“That he was _Hawk Moth._ ”

“Oh kid no. Not until I ran into Nooroo.”

“And you didn’t,” then Adrien remembered, “right, you guys can’t tell us that sort of thing can you?”

“We did this.”

“Yeah. I guess you did.” He knew he should be upset but right now he just felt _empty._ “Is what you said really the only way we can fix this?”

“Hey,” Plagg came over and hovered over his shoulder, “It’ll be ok. If Nooroo thinks he’s capable of it then he must be.”

“I don’t know if I _want_ him to be.”

Plagg waited in silence.

“I mean he’s _Hawk Moth,_ he’s who everyone in Paris has been terrified of this whole time right? Wouldn’t it be easier if he was a terrible person who wanted to take over the world and never loved me? Then I could go to Ladybug and tell her everyone and never have to see him again. But if we _solve_ this, if he does love me and he can be a better father and apparently he’s just doing all of this because he wants to get my mum back then what am I supposed to do?”

“That’s up to you.”

“What? Aren’t you going to give me some speech on like, justice or forgiveness or something?”

“That sounds more like Tikki’s area.”

“Yeah.” Adrien _wishes_ he could speak to Ladybug. Except he doesn’t because she’d be so unimpressed with him if he admitted he’d been living with Hawk Moth the whole time. Or maybe she wouldn’t be. Maybe she, with from what he’s gleaned a totally happy family life, would pity him.

And he doesn’t want to be pitied. He just wants someone to listen to it all without judging and tell him that it sucks, and then tell him what to do.

And Ladybug might do that last thing.

Except Adrien doesn’t know if he’d want to do what she wants him to do.

“I guess it’d better check on Father and Nathalie.” He tells Plagg because he doesn’t really have any other options.

* * *

“Adrien,” Nathalie’s lips almost quirk up at the edges, “I’m glad to see you.”

It’s harder seeing them, and having to try and reconcile the people he knows with the villains he’s been fighting. He doesn’t admit any of that to her though, “I thought I’d better get here before school to see what Father was going to do.”

“Good thinking. I’ve called you in sick though. I didn’t think him failing your classes was a good use of our time.”

“Yeah, that was,” he trails off catching sight of his father, “What are you _wearing?_ What have you done to my _hair?_ ”

Technically the outfit isn’t actually heinous in of itself. He does recognise the beige chinos and red jumper from his wardrobe even if they’re not things he wears much, and there’s nothing _wrong_ with them per se. It’s just not a combination he would have made.

The _hair_ on the other hand. He’s slicked it back with gel and _Adrien’s hair is not cut for that,_ and his father knows that. It looks terrible. Like a helmet or something.

“ _You_ pick my clothes,” he says offended, “And my hair’s fine for ad campaigns apparently. Why do this?”

“I will concede the hair was a mistake. You’ve the wrong hair texture and bone structure for it but it’s not easily fixable now. And your normal clothes _are_ well-suited to _you._ But I’m not you, and seeing as we’re not planning to go out I thought trying to make that visually clear might help all of us.”

Maybe it was being used to Felix but weird as seeing his father act like his father in his body was Adrien had quite easily been able to adjust to talking to someone who looked like him but was a completely different person.

But if it helped his father and, he guessed Nathalie, who it probably did find it really disorienting to remember who she was speaking to, then it might be worth doing. “Do you have jeans I could wear then?”

“Somewhere.” He admitted. “I wouldn’t hold out for a t-shirt though.”

* * *

Once he’d sorted that out and dressed they come back downstairs, and he follows his father into the Atelier.

Nathalie looks up, “The schedule should be available for you two to access sir.”

“Good,” his father says and walks over to his screen. Then he stops. “Nathalie. This is too high up.”

“It’s the right height for Adrien right now.”

“ _Nathalie._ ”

“Alright I think I remember how it adjusts.”

Adrien’s face wrinkles in confusion, “It _adjusts?_ ”

“Theoretically your father might actually want to sit down.”

“Huh.”

* * *

Both he and his father looked at the screen.

Eventually his father spoke, “Nathalie has reduced the number of upcoming photoshoots so there should be some space to play with. What do you want to do?”

“What do I do if I want _you_ to come to something?”

“You can submit it as suggested event for me if you want, and I can accept it. I doubt I have much choice.”

It would, really have been nice, if his father could _maybe_ have not sounded like spending time with Adrien was so distasteful.

* * *

“So you don’t have any objections to your Chinese lessons then?”

“No I want to keep those. I think they might be useful.” That that was partly because he thought _Ladybug_ might be part Chinese and he wanted to impress her family was something he _wasn’t_ going to admit in the circumstances.”

* * *

“What sort of holiday do you want anyway?” Nathalie calls over from her desk, “Preferably one without a high chance of breaking any limbs.”

Adrien wasn’t sure what sort of holidays Nathalie went on but, “I think people usually go to hot places with beaches we could do that?”

“Great.” Nathalie says, “I’ll look into that then.”

“You don’t sound very enthused.” His father points out.

“Do I _look_ like I tan?”

* * *

“Do you think any of this is going to help?”

His father sighs, “I’m hoping cumulatively it will do something.”

“Are you going to roll it all back if it doesn’t?”

“No,” he didn’t meet Adrien’s eyes, “You’re right. I have been neglecting you. And you are old enough to have some sort of say in your life. I realise it doesn’t make up for fighting you, but I think you do deserve this.”

That was progress. Of a sort at least. His father was _trying_ now which was a first.

* * *

Around lunchtime the buzzer went letting them know someone was at the gate.

His father looked up, “Were we expecting any deliveries Nathalie?”

“No.” She says looking worried, “We weren’t.” Then she answered it at her desk.

“Hello? Adrien’s not feeling well I’m afraid, did your teacher not tell you.”

There was an indistinct answer from the other side of the phone.

“That’s very sweet of you but I don’t know if he’s up for visitors.”

More disagreement.

“Look, I’ll ask and see if he’s available.” She put the phone down.

Adrien couldn’t contain his curiosity. “Who was that?”

“Mlles. Bourgeois, Dupain-Chang, and Rossi come to visit you. I didn’t think they were friends.”

Much as it made him feel a little funny regards the first two, the fact was, “They’re not.”

His father overdramatically slumped forward against the screen, “Telling them Adrien was banned from dating was supposed to make them _go away_ not make them come to the house.”

“What.” Nathalie says flatly and he remembers she wasn’t really there for all of that conversation.

“They’re Adrien’s harem.” His father says, “I suppose I should only be glad Tomoe has too much control over her daughter to let her join in on this unexpected visit.”

“Stop calling them that! That makes it sound weird! They’re my _friends._ OK, maybe not Lila, but Chloé and Marinette are.”

“I’m aware of the situation with Lila.”

Nathalie suddenly straightens up, “Are we not working with Lila anymore?”

His father pinches at the bridge of his nose, and it’s never not going to be weird seeing his tics on himself, and says, “I don’t know. Look, I’ve told her to back off from Adrien as him, I should probably do so as myself at some point, but I haven’t actually cancelled her contract or anything.”

Nathalie sags a little. “Pity.”

“She does have something you know.”

“I’m aware.”

He looks up, “Do you want me to make sure she never works again Adrien?”

“Um, like, in the industry? Or in general? Because that seems like a bit much. But if you’re saying ensuring that she doesn’t work _with me_ again then yeah I’d like that.”

“Nathalie?”

“I’ll get it done sir.”

“You don’t have to blacklist her from _Gabriel._ Honestly if it keeps her out of trouble it’s probably a good thing for her to be working.” Adrien rushed to clarify because it felt both a bit mean otherwise when Lila had seemed to be following what he’d asked of her generally, and because honestly anything that distracted her from _him,_ and their class was a good thing in his books.

“I you want.” Nathalie agrees, but he can’t help but get the feeling she’s slightly disappointed. “What do the two of you want to do about Adrien’s fan club?”

“Are they _still_ outside?” his father asks.

“Unfortunately.”

“I guess I should tell them I’m ok.” Adrien admits despite himself because he _should_ when they’ve come all this way to meet him in his lunch break, but this would mean _his father_ having to tell them that.

“I know.” His father says suddenly, “Scarlet Moth. Nathalie refuses to let them in in the rudest way possible. Then I akumatise her, so I can akumatise all three of them.”

“Father.”

His father seems to finally notice his disbelief, and even Nathalie’s disappointed stare. “Sorry right you’re Chat Noir. I keep forgetting.”

“Really? I can’t.”

“Not _forgetting._ Just. I haven’t accepted it I suppose.”

“Also, just putting aside the fact that we’re _supposed_ to have a truce right now, do you _really_ think it’s a good idea to akumatise people who are angry _at you?_ ”

“Technically they’d be angry at Nathalie.”

Adrien does his best to glare at him, and it should be pretty good based on his experience of being on the other end of it.

“You’re right. It’s not a good idea.”

“You’re not even a good villain. Your plans are terrible.”

“I do have other things on, I can’t be Hawk Moth _all_ the time. And Chat Noir’s not exactly the best planner in the world either. You’d be lost without Ladybug.”

“And _you’d_ be lost without Mayura. And, honestly how would I even _know_ if you were Hawk Moth the whole time? It’s not like I see you.”

The gate sound went again.

“Ah, sir, Adrien, what do you want me to tell Adrien’s friends?”

His father looked at Adrien, “They’re _your_ friends.”

“They might have homework or something for me, so I don’t know, maybe we should let them in? But you don’t look ill?”

Sounding utterly exhausted, Nathalie asks, “Do you want to let them in and talk to them while your father goes upstairs and pretends he was in bed the whole time?”

“Yeah ok let’s try that. I mean I have no idea what I’m going to say to them,”

“Whatever you want.” Says his father, and then at Adrien’s confused look he clarifies, “That’s what we’re doing right now isn’t it?”

* * *

At the bottom of the stairs his father suddenly grabbed his wrist, “I think I should tell you something.”

Adrien was slightly lost, “OK?”

“I feel people’s emotions through the Butterfly Miraculous.”

He wasn’t sure what that had to do with anything but, “I’m aware.”

“That girl Marinette. I don’t focus on positive emotions you understand so I can’t tell you what it is but, I felt something from her towards you when I was at your school.”

“Yes, you told me she likes me.”

His father looks like he’s sucking on a lemon, “Yes but, it’s something I’ve felt before. From Nathalie. And _she_ apparently is willing to die for us, so given your alter-ego I thought you might want to know that about your friend.”

“Father?”

“Yes?”

“I probably did need to know that but this is probably the literal _worst possible time_ you could chose to tell me.”

Seriously he’s just about to see Marinette and he can’t do anything about it either.

* * *

It was an immense effort not to just squeak out, a “Hi” at the girls when he opened the door but he just about manages to get his act together and give a passable impression of his father and say, “Good Afternoon. Do the three of you have anything for Adrien then?”

“Um, yes,” Marinette says, “I have this morning’s work actually. They gave it to me as class representative.”

“I tried to explain that I could bring it over but she didn’t listen to me.” Lila pouts.

“Is that all?”

“We want to see Adrien.” Chloé answers.

“Adrien’s ill.”

“So?”

“He’s probably infectious. The three of you should leave. I’ll have Nathalie let you know when he’s up for visitors.”

“I’m sure we’d make him feel better.”

“I’m sure you wouldn’t.”

Marinette bites her lip, “Is he going ok?”

“Of course he’s going to be ok,” he can’t help but want to reassure her, “It’s just a cold.”

He really hopes they get this sorted out quickly enough that it’s just a cold.

“Is someone looking after him?” Chloé asks, “Your assistant or whatever?”

“Adrien is being fully looked after.”

“We really don’t mind chancing illness to help him feel better.”

For a moment he _was_ tempted to let them go up and let his father deal with it, but then he remembered what his father had done to his hair and he neither wanted to give Lila blackmail material, _or_ embarrass himself in front of Marinette or Chloé.

Too late he wonders what they thinking of _his_ outfit but Chloé was the only one of the three who’d really met his father multiple times so he thinks that the other two aren’t likely to pick up that it’s _that_ out of the ordinary.

“I’m sure Adrien would really appreciate that but he’s sleeping right now. He needs his rest. I’ll let him know you came.”

For a moment he doubts they’ll accept it but then Chloé huffs and announces she’ll be back later and they all leave.

Marinette hesitates on the threshold and looks back before following them and he wonders if his father could possibly be right about the feelings he’d sensed from her. He, or he-as-Adrien anyway, had never done anything to deserve _that_ type of loyalty from her. He has no idea what to do with it.

It’s something to sort out once they’re out of this mess though.


	9. Chapter 9

Nathalie sighs. He can tell it’s somewhat performative and indulges her, “A problem?”

“It’s Adrien’s photoshoot tomorrow sir. I’m struggling to find a last minute replacement for it.”

Adrien frowns down at him, “Why would we need a replacement?”

Gabriel would honestly be impressed with him if he wasn’t the victim here. It does feel rather karmic.

“Well, it doesn’t seem like this is going to be fixed by tomorrow does it?” Nathalie points out the thing they’ve all been trying to avoid.

“Why can’t father do it though? I mean he knows what you’re looking to get out of it doesn’t he?”

“I suppose, he _could._ Only I don’t think it looks very good if we take you out of school for being ill and then send you to a photoshoot.”

“It’ll only be a few days,” he _refuses_ to admit this might take any longer than that, “We can pay whatever fine they impose if they decide we’re taking Adrien out without good reason.”

She presses her lips together, “Will you be able to _cope_ though sir? There will be, you know, make-up artists and people.”

He cringes at the reminder of the people he’ll have to let touch him, but it’s not like it’ll be for the first time. “I am aware.”

Nathalie looks unconvinced. “If you’re sure sir.”

“I can come along if you need help.” Adrien grins at him and for a moment he looks so much like Emilie he doesn’t have it in him to refuse.

He’d, not forgotten that Adrien was so like his mother when that’s thrown in his face every time he sees his son, but he hadn’t realised just how much of Emilie was living in him.

He’d refused to see that, because admitting that was admitting that Adrien was what he had left of Emilie and _that_ was to admit that he didn’t _have_ Emilie anymore.

And he can’t admit that.

* * *

Adrien’s fairly buzzing at his side. He keeps looking down at him like he’s about to say something and then not saying it.

“Spit it out,” he says eventually.

Adrien blinks at him in what looks like unfeigned confusion, “What?”

“Whatever it is you want to say to me. Just say it.”

“It’s what you said earlier about Marinette. Do you think you _can_ like two people? Or am I imagining things with her or Ladybug.”

At this point he can’t even be disappointed at the confirmation it _is_ Ladybug his son likes. “You’re very young. I think some confusion is normal at your age.”

“Were you? When you were my age?”

“I barely noticed girls at your age. Not in that sense. I had, an aesthetic appreciation I suppose. I’m fairly certain most of others at school thought I was gay honestly. Stereotypes.”

In fairness they hadn't been entirely wrong but that's a conversation for another day.

“Was that hard?”

“Not really. I’ve always been good at ignoring people.”

Adrien snorts, “Yeah I can see that.” Then his son says, “How did you know she was the one with Mum?”

“I don’t think I had opportunity to think otherwise. Your mother was a force of nature.”

Nathalie is purposefully not meeting their eyes.

“Do you have something to say?” He asks her.

“Mme. Agreste once said that she wasn’t sure you realised she was flirting with you until she actually kissed you.”

“That’s not exactly untrue,” he admits. In his defence she’d known she was flirting. He just hadn’t known as she flirting _seriously_ rather than it just being her personality or some sort of power-play because back then Emilie Graham de Vanily had been someone much more connected than Gabriel Agreste.

That she’d chosen _him_ anyway is something he still doesn’t understand why she’d done it to this day.

Adrien’s face has screwed up, “I’m not sure I want to know about _that_ part of it.”

“Take it as a warning then.” He suggests, “So you’re more aware than I _am._ ”

“You don’t think Marinette would just kiss me out of _nowhere_ do you?” Adrien says looking panicked, “If that the case you are _banned_ from seeing her ever until we get back into the right bodies.”

“Trust me,” he says dryly, “I have _no_ issues going along with that.”

If he _was_ going to betray Emilie by kissing someone else, which he’s not, he’s certainly not going to start with a teenage girl with a crush on his son. The very thought is repulsive and that’s coming from someone that preys on teenagers’ emotions all the time.

“If don’t think Marinette would anyway.” Adrien exhales, “She is really great you know? I probably would have noticed that before it wasn’t for Ladybug. But you know Ladybug’s _Ladybug._ ”

Adrien leaves it there was if that’s all there is to say, and maybe it _is_ because as infuriating as it is that Ladybug keeps defeating him, he can’t deny that it’s impressive she manages to do so. Especially at her age.

 _I’m sorry Emilie, I keep getting defeated by our son and his would-be girlfriend,_ he imagines saying to her casket. He’s sure that would go down fantastically with her.

“I’m aware.” He replies.

“I guess you’d prefer Marinette to Ladybug.”

“I’m not sure it makes much difference. If I’ve been fighting _you_ I don’t think fighting your girlfriend as well makes things much worse. Unless you think she might agree to bring your mother back when it’s _your_ mother.”

“You know she wouldn’t.”

“Are you sure?”

“Father. I don’t know how to tell you that murdering people is wrong.”

Nathalie tilts her head and raises her eyebrows in slight disagreement.

“And Nathalie, no volunteering doesn’t make it alright. Did you even think about how we’d miss you?”

“He’s right,” he feels the need to say, “You’re not allowed to abandon us.”

“I already said I wouldn’t last night.”

Technically he’s not sure that she really had but he’s not going to argue the point. “Well, you’re not allowed to.”

“Alright,” she says and _almost_ smiles.

He wishes he knew how to fix her. How to convince her that he’s not worth all of this. How to convince her to value herself the way he does.

“Adrien,” he says, “I think you can have feelings for two people, and that doesn’t mean they’re not true, but when it comes down to it you have to choose and commit.”

“I know I have to. I just don’t know how.”

He looks up at his son and his wishes a lot of things, most of all that he could help him with this but, “I don't think that's something I can help you with “

* * *

They watch Adrien leave for the second night.

“It's not working is it?” He says, admitting their defeat.

“It might yet sir.” Nathalie replies, then, “Were you telling him the truth earlier?”

There’s a lot that could cover but Nathalie, as she always does, manages to answer his unasked question. “When you said you'd stick to what you agreed even if it wasn’t what broke this spell?”

“Yes. Why would I lie about that?”

She looks doubtful. “It's a bit of a change for you.”

“I think it might have been what I should have have been doing all along.”

“Then maybe it is working.”

He looks at her in disbelief because he's still physically Adrien.

“They wanted you and Adrien to fix your relationship when they did this didn't they?” she says, “It seems like that's working at least.”

“It’s a bit of a big bet to take. Adrien. He’s my _son,_ but sometimes I think he might still turn us in." And that does anger him on some level, he can't pretend otherwise, "After all he didn’t even risk letting his friends talk to me today.”

“In fairness, you don’t look ill, and what with the hair, we’d probably be lucky that they didn’t think you were Felix.”

“Still though. I don’t know that Adrien wouldn’t protect us from prison.”

“We knew that was a risk when we started this. It’s not really new.”

“Isn’t it?” His thoughts all jumble together but, “I thought I was doing this for him. And for Emilie of course. But if it was _just_ me maybe I could have thrown in the towel because this is much bigger than I thought it was going to be when I promised Emilie I’d bring her back. But I told myself that whatever I might think, whatever" her finds himself looking at Nathalie's face, "temptation I might be provided with this was _necessary_ because Adrien needed her.”

Nathalie hesitates, and then she looks at him, “You would hardly be the first single parent in the world sir.”

“I know. I _do_ know. And I know I’m hardly that really by any metric, I mean, I have _you,_ and his bodyguard. And yet. I do love my son. But I don’t know that I know him. Emilie always was the one who looked after him, and I have no idea how to start. Especially when it turns out _he’s_ the whole reason we’re never had her back. And that he doesn’t seem to regret that.”

Nathalie gives a dark almost laugh, “Oh he regrets that.”

“What?” He looks up at Nathalie and wishes that he was in his normal position looking down at her.

“If Emilie could reappear in some way he wasn’t responsible for he’d be ecstatic. Even if you’d defeated him and Ladybug but he hadn’t put together who you were he’d be happy but. He knows now. And we can’t take that back. So all we can do is try to fill that void.” A moment later she realises what she’s said, “I mean, _you_ try and fill that void. I misspoke.”

“I don’t know that you did. You are important to Adrien you know.”

“I’m starting to realise that. And _that’s_ a sign of how much we’ve failed him; that he’d come to _me_ for comfort.”

“I think,” and these feel like words he shouldn’t say but, “it’s not unnatural. You’ve been there much of his life.”

“Perhaps. Do you know, back before I worked it out, when I didn’t know I wasn’t you, he wanted me to be more affectionate with him?”

“What?”

“He basically told me to hug him. That’s part of what tipped me off.”

That makes a certain level of sense. The image of Nathalie hugging his son is confusing. That’s _Emilie’s_ place and Emilie isn’t here. Yet, Adrien needs _someone_ and this sort of thing isn’t _his_ forte, and if Nathalie can do it then he can't see why he should stop her. In fact it provokes a strange warmth in his chest imaging her comforting his son.

“Have I done _so_ badly by him?”

“I don’t know. It’s not like I had a stellar childhood myself, so it’s not like I can really judge. And you’ve always made sure he has whatever he might need. But. If you’re asking if he’s missed you. Then yes. He _has._ You have abandoned him.”

“Those are stronger words than usual from you.”

“It’s hard to find you that severe looking like Adrien sir.”

“I can. Understand that. I suppose, " he has to admit, "but why on earth did you never say anything before?”

“I’m only your assistant. I know my place. And I value my job. I’d rather not be fired for overstepping.”

“I don’t know if you would have been overstepping.”

“You’re claiming you _wouldn’t_ have fired me?”

He’d like to. He’d really really like to. But in good conscience. “No, I can’t claim I wouldn’t have.” It would have been unfair but, “I might have. But I’m glad I didn’t. You’re very important to Adrien -and to me.”

“It seems a little hard to believe. But if you say so.”

“I wouldn’t mind you hugging him.”

“What?”

“If you want to. I wouldn’t mind you hugging Adrien. He needs more than I can give him.”

“Oh. _Oh._ I’d have thought,”

“I might have yes. But I think I’ve been unfair. How can I expect Adrien to know his mother’s coming back to us without _telling_ him that?”

“I don’t think you can.”

It’s a change of tune from when she’d happily gone along with him, but then _he’s_ changing his tune too, and it’s not as if even she could have known that he would.

“Do you think I should show him Emilie?”

“At this stage, yes. He deserves to know before he makes any sort of decision.”

“Do you think that it’s possible her could still maintain this loyalty to Ladybug over his own mother after seeing her?”

“I can’t say. Adrien is." He can see her picking her words carefully, "He’s a sweet boy. I’m not sure he’s ever going to be able to countenance any sort of exchange even if it is for his mother.”

“And yet you were willing to do that.”

“And present it as a fait accompli. I know it’s rather the opposite of my job description but I figured that in the circumstances I’d be justified leaving you to deal with whatever came after.”

“Thank you Nathalie. That’s very helpful to hear.” He agrees sarcastically. It’s hard to make himself say but, “Do you think Adrien trusts me?”

“That would seem to depend how you define trust sir. I don’t think he thinks you’re going to make a serious attempt on his Miraculous until all of this is fixed. But I think he’s probably expecting you to be honest about the rest of it. ”

That feels like both a blessing and a burden right now.


	10. Chapter 10

It’s strange. The house has always threatened to be a prison rather than a refuge for Adrien; its walls cutting him off from the rest of the world. Yet sat in this hotel room by himself he can’t help but feel like he should have stayed there longer.

It’s lonely here with only Plagg to talk to.

And it’s not like he can talk to any of his friends because he’s still stuck in the wrong body. Gabriel Agreste can’t just turn up at Nino’s house.

It’s not like he can tell the _whole_ truth of what’s he’s struggling with to his father and Nathalie but at least he can tell them some of it. At least _they_ know what’s happening.

He stares at his phone screen again.

He can message people but it’s not like he can say about any of this.

Or.

Not about the most of his problems but.

He pulls up his conversation with Nino and types out, “hey, did you know Marinette likes me???” then deletes it. He only has his father’s word for that, and his father _does_ wear a Miraculous that lets him sense people’s emotions but then he’d also apparently had no idea about what was going on between him and Nathalie so Adrien isn’t sure that counts for much.

Then he tries, “R u & Alya trying to set me up with Marinette?”

That he deletes for being too accusatory.

“Do u think Marinette likes me?”

That sounds like he _wants_ a yes, and he doesn’t really know if he wants a yes. It would be _simpler_ if she didn’t. He _certainly_ doesn’t want her to be ready to throw her morals and her life away for him the way Nathalie does for his father. And yet there’s something in the image of hanging out with his friends and being able to put an arm around Marinette the way Nino does around Alya sometimes that means he can’t quite get it out of my head.

“Weird question. But does Marinette like me as more than a friend?”

He presses send.

His phone rings immediately and he hits decline.

Even if he only took it as a voice call he’d never get away with this.

“Sorry.” He sends back, “Have completely lost my voice 😢”

“ 🙁 that sucks 😭😭😭” Nino replies followed by, “ur talking to me again tho?”

“was I not???”

“I thought maybe u were giving me the silent treatment after what I said about ur dad 😕”

His father had not mentioned _this,_ and Adrien wishes he knew what had happened, though, “he probably deserved it. U & me r fine.”

“ 😁”

“just been ill 😔”

“yeah, mari said she couldn’t get in to see you.”

“tbf I was asleep.”

“fair.”

They seem to be getting off track and he tries again, “srsly though. Marinette???”

“oh yeah right.”

“so????”

“idk I feel bad saying anything 😬”

He stares at the phone. That _is not_ a denial. _At all._ “she does????”

“ok u have to swear u will not tell alya.”

Before Adrien can respond Nino adds, “or marinette.”

“yeah sure” he agrees.

“then yeah. she does. she has for AGES.”

“what?????????????????????”

Honestly he’s not sure that was enough question marks. He had not known that.

At Nino’s lack of immediate response he adds, “I thought she didn’t like me at first???”

“For like, less than a day.”

“omg” because seriously what, “why did she never say anything?”

“trust me. we tried. but she kept screwing it up.”

Things suddenly start to all look very different if she hadn’t been put off by him at all, and it makes sense because generally Marinette _isn’t actually shy._ She organises the whole class when she wants to.

“wait. Is this why she says such random stuff sometimes???”

“yh.”

“wtf”

“how did you realise?????”

Adrien hadn’t an answer prepared for that, and was trying to think of one, when his phone went again.

“is it embarrassing?”

Clearly he’d taken too long, though actually Nino is right. And actually he can admit that much he supposes.

“yes” he sends, then “my father told me 🤦🏼️😱”

“dude.”

“I know”

“legit did not kno he even knew who she was.”

“he does. she won that competiton.”

“oh ok.” Nino replies, and before Adrien can think of a response, “wait does he want her to date u b/c of that? In some weird fashion plan or sth? I thought u were banned from dating.”

“im negotiating. “

“nice. so u r going to ask her out? 😉 ”

That was the question. “I like her but I like someone else too. So I probably shouldn’t until I work that out.”

“oh right Kagami. That’s difficult.”

He feels a bit bad about it but he doesn’t correct his friend. If Nino knew he was talking about Ladybug he’d probably tell Adrien he should move on because he didn’t even know her, and besides they everyone knew there was something between her and Chat Noir. Which was both not exactly true and exactly the problem.

“pls don’t tell marinette 🥺”

“ur secret is safe with me 👍”

“thanks.”

“I think u should though.”

That idea was terrifying. “no!!! I cant hurt her! Marinette deserves everything 🥺🥺🥺”

“but not u?”

“not if idk if I like her like she does me.”

“u said u did 🤔”

“yh, but I only realised like, yesterday. Idk if I like her enough.”

“not sure how u can’t but ok”

Adrien felt the same way. Marinette was just _so_ nice. She did so much for everyone that she didn’t have to and just made the entire class better. In a world without Ladybug maybe he’d have had a crush on Marinette from the start too because she was just a really amazing person.

Also really pretty.

Which he got was shallow but he couldn’t pretend he didn’t know that Marinette was _definitely_ the prettiest girl in his class. No offense to any of the others.

Now out of her and _Ladybug,_ Adrien could admit it would be a difficult contest. Especially because embarrassing as it was, it seemed like he had a type.

His phone binged, “u still there?”

“just thinking.”

“lmk if you work it out.”

Adrien threw the phone on the bed. He didn’t feel like he was going to work it out anytime soon. Not least because he didn’t even know if he was going to have a chance with _either_ Ladybug or Marinette.

Maybe once they fixed this his father would go right back to akumatising people and then he’d get himself caught, and thrown in jail, and Adrien would go from being famous for being a model, to being famous for being Hawk Moth’s son. 

And even if someone either of them could forgive him for knowing and not stopping it both Marinette and Ladybug deserved better than a supervillain’s son and all the publicity dating him would entail.

“Plagg,” he calls out suddenly feeling stifled in this room, “Claws out.”

* * *

As he bounds over the Parisian rooftops he was glad at least that he was getting the chance to let some energy off.

He pauses when Marinette’s window comes into sight. If only this was all fixed. He’d _liked_ being Chat Noir with Marinette, and it would be easier to work out how he felt about her if he didn’t know she liked the guy she was speaking to. Which he’d still know, but as Chat Noir she wouldn’t and maybe she’d be more open. As it is _that’s_ not an option.

Though he supposes that if they’d never swapped his father would have barely have interacted with Marinette, and would never have noticed she was interested in Adrien, and who knows if or when he’d ever have worked it out himself.

Sighing, he moved on.

* * *

“Hey kitty,”

He almost jumps at her voice, “Hi Ladybug.”

She looks him up and down. “Still trying out a different look?”

“Something like that.”

“The hair’s better, but I have to say, I’m kind of missing the old Chat.”

“Me too,” he mutters, then, “wait what do you mean the hair’s better?”

_What has Plagg done?_

_And why?_

“Uh, the ponytail? Honestly maybe that might be something worth trying out with your normal look.”

“ _The ponytail?_ I have a _ponytail?_ ”

“You didn’t know?”

“Trust me. I’m not in control of any of this.” He is _definitely_ taking a photo of this when he gets back to the hotel room and sending it to Nathalie though.

Ladybug looks up at him and yeah she does _always_ look up at him but it’s different when he’s his father’s height, “Is this really your Kwami’s doing?”

Looking down at her he doesn’t want to lie, and he doesn’t have to _exactly,_ “the ponytail is.”

“Oh.” Ladybug bites her lip, “So the rest of it?”

“It’s kind of a curse.”

“Are you _alright?_ ”

That makes him laugh, and he only stops when he realises the concern he’s created on her face, “Physically I’m fine, and I’m not in danger or anything,” or at least he _hopes_ he’s not, “but emotionally?”

“That bad.”

“Yeah,”

“Is there anything I can do? If it’s Miraculous-related then maybe I could help?”

“You can’t. Sorry I didn’t mean to sound rude, but I know how to fix it. I just…don’t know if I’m going to be able to do that.”

The pity on her face hurts. Ladybug _caring_ for him is everything but he doesn’t _want_ her to pity him.

“Hey,” she reaches out to take his hand, but with their height difference he can’t forget the situation and he pulls it away.

“Sorry,” he says, “It’s just _weird_ like this.”

“I can get that.” She hesitates, “Do you really think you might not be able to sort this out?”

“I can’t let myself think like that,” and things _are_ getting better at home. He _has_ to let himself belief there’s hope for them, and hope for them as a family.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not really.” He answers even though he does, “It’s just. Things are complicated.”

“Sometimes it helps to spread the burden.”

“I’m not sure you’d want this one.”

“You’re my partner, I’m not going to let you struggle alone. Besides dealing with magical problems is basically what we do right?”

“I guess.” He stares out over the city skyline instead of meeting Ladybug’s eyes, “What would you do if you discovered someone you cared about was doing something bad?”

“That’s a tough question. I don’t know if I can answer it without knowing the exact situation. Is that how you got into this mess?”

His first reaction was no, but then in a way it had been. If his father hadn’t been Hawk Moth then Nooroo and Duusu would never have had the chance or any reason to do this.

“Something like that.”

“I guess if they were playing with some sort of dangerous magic, it would depend why they’re doing it, and if they could be convinced to stop.”

Adrien wished he knew the answer to the latter but, “What if why they’re doing it isn’t a bad thing? What if it’s an _understandable_ thing that you’d want too? Except you know they can’t because magic has a price you can’t let them pay. Would you give them the chance to stop or would you feel like you had to force it?”

Ladybug frowned, “If stopping them was the only way then I’d have to stop them, but stopping someone from doing something doesn’t mean you can’t give them the chance to do better does it? I mean we prevent Hawk Moth winning every time we spend out an akuma but that doesn’t mean he can’t decide to stop going after us, or to start sending out super _hero_ akumas does it?”

“That’s because we’ve never been able to find out who he is,” Adrien points out, but doesn’t add that he does now. “If we actually confronted Hawk Moth then it’s not like we could just be like, “ok so you get one more chance,” is it?”

“I wish I knew why Hawk Moth _does_ want our Miraculous. I feel that would make a pretty big difference.”

“Yeah I wish,” I didn’t he silently adds.

“I mean the Butterfly Miraculous is pretty versatile? Why does he need ours?”

“To make a Wish I guess.”

“Do you think he knows what that would cost?”

“I don’t think he’d care.” His answer is automatic but then he wonders. His father had been absolutely horrifically fine with the idea of hypothetically sacrificing someone but he _had_ refused the idea of Nathalie. Clearly expecting him to care about people in general is a lost cause, but if he’s not willing to lose Nathalie, if he’s not willing to lose _Adrien_ could that be enough?

Could he convince him to give up, not because it’s the right thing to do, but for _him?_

“I’d best get to bed.” He says, “Thanks for you know, all of this.”

“I’m not sure I did much.”

“No, you helped.”

“You know, I realise this whole things makes things difficult, but if you ever need someone then I’m there.”

“Thanks. That does mean a lot.”

* * *

“I don’t understand how he’s so bad at this.” Adrien says to Nathalie as he watching his father get into a shouting match with a photographer who dared to try to reposition him with his hands, “Also I kind of feel it’s ironic for _him_ to trash _my_ reputation after everything.”

She doesn’t look away from the scene in front of them. “This is what I was worried about.”

“But, I know he’s not used to being _this_ side of a camera but surely he must know how this all works?”

“Your father is a very talented man but he knows where his abilities lie. We pay people who know what they’re doing to work out the ads and the photo spreads.”

“Still. I mean he’s _me,”_ and honestly it’s a relief to see his father hasn’t made any attempt to differentiate himself from Adrien today, “That should be enough for the cameras. It’s a boring job and it can be tiring when it drags on but it’s not difficult.”

Nathalie looks at him oddly, “You do know you’re good at it right?”

“Because I’m photogenic?”

“You are. But that only takes you so far. There’s plenty of beautiful people who just come across as lifeless. You’re good at performing. And your father, well, he _is_ charismatic but it’s not in the same way.”

“But he looks like me right now?”

“He looks like you. But he’s not you. You probably don’t realise but it’s been very odd watching both of you. You don’t have the all the same movements or expressions, and now you’re still making Adrien-expressions with his face. I should have worked out what had happened earlier from that.”

“You got there pretty quickly.”

“I’m with him most of the day nearly every day. I should have worked it out sooner. I think that would have spared us both some embarrassment.”

“I mean, you didn’t really do anything.” He’d been telling himself that since it happened and technically it _was_ the truth. “And you know, once this is fixed, I don’t have an issue with the idea of you and him.”

“Still.”

“I’m sorry about that whole conversation we had about me when you didn’t know it was me.”

“I don’t mind. It made me realise a few things. You shouldn’t have to ask for things like that. And” the corner of her mouth quirked up, “I’m quite happy to hug you, but not until the two of you get sorted back. Now, I think it’s time for ‘Gabriel’ to go over and reprimand ‘Adrien’.”

“But I’m,” then realising he says, “You want _me_ to go and tell _him_ off?”

She looked down at her watch. “We’re running behind schedule. And please try and give him some guidance on his facial expressions.”

* * *

He just about manages not to laugh as he tells his father not to shame their name and to apolgise to the photographer.

Just about.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK it got darker again. I blame Emilie tbh.

Adrien takes a step back from him, and his mouth falls open, and when he speaks it’s barely more than a whisper.

“What?”

Despite his Miraculous Adrien’s emotions have never much caught his attention.

In part because whatever else he’s done he’s never tried to focus on them, the same way as he’s never focused on Nathalie’s. Something he’s always justified as being unnecessarily intrusive since his plans have never been to akumatise either of them involuntarily. He’s starting to think that must have been a lie he told himself because he was scared of what he might find.

The other reason is that Adrien’s emotions have never seemed particularly strong. They don’t call out to him the way many of his classmates’ do from streets away. _That_ Gabriel had always put down to his son’s emotional restraint and congratulated himself on it. Now he thinks it more likely has to do with Adrien’s own Miraculous having some sort of muting effect.

Right now though none of this is stopping the mix of disbelief, hope and anger Adrien’s feeling stabbing him in the chest.

“I thought I should bring you to see your mother.” He repeats. “Given you know the rest of it, there seemed little reason to keep deceiving you there.”

“But, _but,_ ” Adrien stutters, “She _disappeared,_ we don’t know where she is, are you saying you knew where she was the whole time?”

He nods.

“But I don’t understand. Why do you need my Miraculous and Ladybug’s then if we’re able to visit her?” He looks between him and Nathalie, “Why did you let me think we’d have to sacrifice someone to get her back?”

Perhaps he’d misspoke but he’d never expected Adrien to think that Emilie was _alright_ from what he’d said. He’d only ever disagreed on the point of losing _Nathalie_ to save Emilie not that Emilie wasn’t lost.

Then again he can hardly blame his son for clutching at straws when he’s been chasing after an impossible hope since they put Emilie in the casket.

Part of him is tempted to lie, to let Adrien think Emilie is only trapped somewhere away from them, and see if _that_ would force his hand.

But it’s feels too late for that now.

He’s told Adrien he can bring him to visit Emilie.

And, if _selfless_ love for Adrien can break this curse, then he fears that his _selfish_ love for Emilie might entrench it permanently and that’s not a risk he can take.

“Adrien,” in other circumstances he might reach out to Adrien’s shoulder to ground him but it’s an impossibility in their switched bodies, “It would be a sacrifice.”

He hadn’t really realised that before, but Adrien’s distress at the idea, the image he’s never going to be able to get out of his mind of Nathalie lying lifeless in Emilie’s place, makes it impossible to consider it with the blithe dismissal he had before.

“Your mother is, think of it as being in a coma, one incurable by conventional medicine.”

“She’s in a hospital?”

“No, that would have caused more questions, and interfering doctors trying to withdraw care. She’s” he exhales, “It’s easier if I show you.”

“OK,” Adrien’s voice wavers, “How far away is she? Do I need a coat or something?”

This is it, “We won’t be leaving the house Adrien.”

He turns away from his son and reaches to Emilie’s portrait to activate the lift. “Come here.”

Logistically he hadn’t considered how his son’s body would affect things, first making him reach up instead of forward and then Adrien’s reach is a little shorter than his own so he has to take a larger step back than he expects to the lift.

“You have a _supervillain_ lair, and you keep her in it?”

He gives Adrien an annoyed tug to pull him into place to go down, “You do already know I’m Hawk Moth, and no I don’t keep her in the lair.”

“You’re _two_ secret places in this house?”

“Yes.”

Adrien’s voice sounds shaky like he’s about to cry, “I don’t know what I expected.”

Impossibly the journey seems longer than it usually does but they reach the bottom eventually and he guides Adrien out of the lift. “Come and see your mother.”

Their footsteps echo on the catwalk, and somehow despite the fact that they’re _his feet_ right now, it’s the muffled thud of Adrien’s trainers in the cavernous room accompanying his usual footsteps, instead of the sharp clang of Nathalie’s heals that makes him realise the enormity of what he’s doing.

Adrien is _here._

Adrien’s going to see Emilie.

All his secrets will be known to his son after today.

Adrien makes a sound of pure distress as he gets closer than pushes past him to get to Emilie.

It’s disorienting. For all Gabriel’s spent a morning trying and failing to mimic his son to everyone’s despair, right now it feels like Adrien’s mimicking him perfectly as he reaches out to Emilie’s coffin with grief plastered all over his face.

_Is that what I look like?_

It feels correct, but the longer he watches the more he realises that no, that’s not what he looks like now.

He _had_ done. At first. But while Emilie’s absence is a constant pain in his chest the hurt has muted over time.

He’s got too used to failing.

In some ways he’s adjusted to that. To this new life without Emilie, and chasing two teenagers for their pieces of magical jewellery.

Seeing Adrien like this he’s reminded why he’s doing to. That he’s _meant_ to be putting his family back together.

But now he knows that he’s been fighting his son and pushing him away this whole time and it feels like he’s on some sort of precipice. This awkward life of constant risk without reward can’t go on as it has. Not now he knows. Not now _Adrien_ knows.

What he doesn’t know is how it will change.

His focus has been on regaining his own body. He’s neglecting regaining Emilie’s life for that. And now he doesn’t know if the change he can taste on the air is a resolution with her or without her.

“Is that really her?” Adrien suddenly asks.

“Yes of course.” It’s not as if he’d had made a doll of his late wife to keep in a ridiculously complicated casket which necessitates an absurd amount of power.

“No I mean,” Adrien hesitates, “They say you should talk to people in a coma right? Because they’re still in there? That even if machines are keeping them alive they are alive? Is she?”

“She’s not dead,” he snaps and it’s how unusual that sounds in Adrien’s voice that makes him soften towards his son, “but no it’s not like those cases. If it were then she wouldn’t be _here.”_

He doesn’t like to admit it but Emilie’s resting place is closer to a cryogenic chamber than life support.

Adrien turns around and there’s tears sliding down his face, and he wonders how he’s managed to cry so quietly.

“What happened?”

Confessing their mistakes is still difficult despite everything else coming out and he shakes his head unable to answer right away.

“This can’t have been sudden,” Adrien gestures around the room, “You had to know something was happening. How did this happen?”

He sighs, “Do you remember in the months before your mother disappeared,”

Adrien interrupts. “She was ill.”

“Yes.”

“You kept telling me nothing was wrong. She went on that holiday, was that supposed to find a cure?”

That’s an oversimplification but, “something like that.”

Something must occur to Adrien for his eyes widen, “ _Nathalie’s_ ill.”

“Yes.”

“So it’s the same thing? Why don’t you _do_ something?”

“I am. I was under the impression you didn’t approve of that.”

“You said you were doing that for my mother. You never mentioned this. But why would they _both_ be ill? Is it something in the house?”

He shuts his eyes unable to meet Adrien’s and see the judgement on his face. “The Peacock Miraculous.”

“What?”

“It’s the Peacock Miraculous. It’s broken. Using it is what’s k-“ he can’t say it, “hurt them both.”

“But, but I never heard of _any_ Miraculous in Paris until you attacked. There weren’t any heroes.”

“Your mother wasn’t a hero.”

“She was like _you?_ ”

Emilie had _never_ been like him. “No, she wasn’t a villain either. You must understand that when we found the two Miraculous,”

“You!” Adrien suddenly shouts, “You told me as of this was for _her,_ that you became Hawk Moth to get her back, you let me think you went after the Butterfly and Peacock _because_ of her, and instead that’s why she’s basically dead, because you wanted power that wasn’t yours.”

“I didn’t,” he shouts back, “Hawk Moth _was_ because of her, I only put the blasted thing on once before we realised what was happening to her. _She_ was the one who wouldn’t wait to see what the jewels would do, who wouldn’t _stop_ even when I tried to steal it from her when I finally realised what was happening. You don’t understand, I helped her find them because I wanted to make her happy, and because, yes the idea of magic captured my imagination too. How couldn’t it? The idea of the ability to create something from nothing more than an emotion? Art and power combined together in one pure form, but when I tried it that first time. I didn’t like it. And she did. And then she wouldn’t stop.”

“But if she wasn’t a hero, and she wasn’t a villain then what was she _doing_ with it?”

“I don’t know.”

“What do you mean you don’t know? How can you not know?”

“The same way I didn’t know you were Chat Noir,” it comes out somewhat sarcastically for all that his bile is all for himself, “You wouldn’t think I’d make the same mistake twice, and yet apparently I’m as blind as I ever was.”

“But you weren’t Hawk Moth then, you spent time with us, with _her._ ”

“Not as much as you might think. Your mother used to fight to carve out that time for you in my schedule. The brand _does_ take a lot of time to manage. And your mother, she was an adult, she was my wife and I trusted her, I don’t know what she did all day when I was at work, other than tutor you.”

“She acted.” Adrien says rather defensively as if he thinks Gabriel doesn’t view her work as real when in fact he has great respect for anyone putting themselves in front of a camera like that, and the morning’s only solidified that.

“Less and less as time went on,” and he’d always put that down to the vagaries of the industry but in retrospect how she’d accepted that and her waning interest in the world outside the Miraculous should have been a warning side, “She was very down for a long while, before she got hold of the Peacock.”

He’d been worried at the time. He’d thought the trip to Tibet might help break her out of whatever low mood was plaguing her. Ironic that.

“No she wasn’t. She was always so happy and full of life.”

“She worked hard to put a front on for you.” Gabriel had envied his son that, “But I thought the Miraculous, her experiments with it, _had_ made her happy.”

“Experiments?”

“Seeing what sentimonsters she could produce I think. She was very creative you know, I often thought she was wasted in front of a camera and not behind it.”

It’s not a lie. It’s not the full truth either. There had been _voices_ other than Emilie’s behind their bedroom door when he’d approached sometimes. He’d caught a figure disappear in a flash of blue once upon opening it.

Nathalie was not the first to make a sentimonster that could be mistaken for a person. Sometimes he’s wondered if Emilie had been what had given her the idea for it.

He’s never asked her.

“Why didn’t you stop her?”

“I _tried._ She wouldn’t listen to me.”

“You should have taken it from her.”

“I thought you didn’t believe in taking a Miraculous from something else?”

That hits Adrien like a blow, “It’s not the same!”

“Isn’t it? Either way my goal would be to save her.”

“If you’d stopped her killing herself, then you wouldn’t have had to do any of this, wouldn’t have had to terrorise Paris, fight _me,_ kill Nathalie.”

He doesn’t care a thing about the first, and he didn’t know about the latter, but the last, “I’m not killing Nathalie.”

It sounds unconvincing even to him.

“Why did you even pretend you had an issue with the idea swapping the two of them to keep us back if you’re been letting her use the Peacock Miraculous all this time.”

“Letting isn’t the word for it,” yet again he’s been making the same mistake, “Nathalie’s not using it like your mother did. Her use has been sparing. She can _stop_ and we’ll survive. We were going to _win_ before it got too far, and then she’s never have to use it again. She’ll be _fine._ ”

“Is that what you’ve been telling yourself?”

There’s pity in Adrien’s words and that’s more cutting than his earlier anger had been.

Nathalie’s steps suddenly echo in the room and he turns around to see her walking towards him, and wonders how long she’s been there.

“I wouldn’t have let him stop me using it,” She says to them, “I didn’t. As it happens.”

“Yes, I think you stealing it and then sneaking off god knows where to use it made that very clear.”

Adrien’s eyebrows almost meet his hairline, “You _stole_ it?”

She shrugs, “I did what I thought I had to do to finish this. To fix things between the two of you. And I am _sorry_ Adrien, I wouldn’t have pulled that trick with that fake Ladybug if I’d known it was you.”

“You know that was an unfair thing to do to Chat Noir whether he was me or not.”

“That’s true,” she admits easily, “but I cared a lot more about you two than I did about Chat Noir.”

Instead of rage or anger Adrien just looks tired. It’s depressively easy to recognise _that_ on his face.

“You know,” Nathalie says, “your father _did_ try.to stop your mother. She was just as stubborn as me.”

Adrien looks back as his mother, and his grief washes over Gabriel, and Nathalie too from the wince she’s made as her hand goes to the pocket concealing her Miraculous.

“Why would she leave us like that?” Adrien says, “How can what she was doing have been more important than her life? Than _us?_ ”

“I don’t know.”

He’s ask himself that question many a time.

Unless he gets Emilie back he’ll never know the answer.

Those sentimonsters; at times he’d wondered. Emilie had wanted another baby, back in those last few years. He hadn’t. Adrien was quite enough, and perhaps he’d known even then he wasn’t exactly the model of a perfect father. He’d had plenty of other reasons too; the gap between Adrien and his putative sibling would have been too large, they were too old to go back to those days of late night feeds and nappy changes now, Emilie would lose the social life she still had. In truth they were all excuses-he just hadn’t wanted another.

If he could go back in time he’d change that decision if it had any chance of stopping her.

But then maybe it would have changed _nothing_ and he would have been left by himself with Adrien and a toddler to deal with with Nathalie’s help.

Adrien’s emotions continue to pulse against his chest.

At another time he’d be running upstairs to akumatise the source of those emotions.

The idea hits him like a freight train.

He _could_ akumatise Adrien.

Adrien wants his mother back but his morals won’t let him act. An akuma would wipe those morals away.

He’d _give_ him his ring. Wait, no. Better to leave him his Miraculous while he spent him out to acquire Ladybug’s. An _akumatised Black Cat Miraculous holder._ His powers could be infinite.

The image comes together in his head, something the opposite of the righteous Chat Noir, someone in Emilie’s colours; _Chat Blanc._

They could _win._ Together.

And then,

And then,

He catches sight of Nathalie out of the corner of his eye.

Could he risk losing her? Having her slide lifeless to the floor as Emilie’s eyes open?

Or Adrien. Her words from before echo in his mind. Could he risk it being _him_ that the spell took?

And Emilie, would she forgive him for using their son?

And this trick of the kwamis have played on them. Would he be forgoing any chance of ever fixing it, if he betrayed this shaky truce of theirs?

The temptation burns against his breast. 

Ripping his Miraculous off he thrusts it into Nathalie’s confused hands, and runs for the lift away from the siren call of emotion that is his son in front of the wife he’s failing.


	12. Chapter 12

He almost doesn’t want to turn to see what the sound behind them is, to see _who_ has come to interrupt their vigil.

But he forces himself to, only to find his father _running_ away from them, and what’s more his vision feels blurred and it almost _does_ look like this father for a second, before it resolves back into him, and his hope falls away, leaving confusion in his wake.

“Is he _leaving_ us here?”

Is _that_ his plan? To hope that being trapped with his mother, with his mother’s _body,_ will make him change his mind?

Nathalie stares after him too, “I think he got overwhelmed.”

“Overwhelmed?”

“By your emotions,” she clarifies, “They're quite,” she pauses, “strong. Which I can't blame you for, it makes sense but I can see why it would be a lot for him.”

“You’re still here.” He can't help but point out.

“It's different for me. Your mother, I regret everything that happened to her and I wish she was still here, but I don’t grieve her the way _he_ does. While I assume he was having to shoulder both his own grief and yours.”

“Oh,” he could see that he guesses. He couldn’t possibly imagine what it would like to feel the pain in his heart _doubled._ “I guess that makes sense. But then I don't think he _can_ be feeling the same as me, because he _knew_ what was going on the whole time, he hasn’t been betrayed and blindsided like I have.”

“I think he felt plenty betrayed when he realised your mother was still using it, but you’re right. It's not the same.”

Falling back into silence he feels the pain and sadness start to submerge him again, and he wonders how much of it Nathalie _does_ feel, and how much his father can feel.

He almost wants them to feel like the way he does. Wants them to know what the three of them have done to him.

More to distract himself than out of any real interest he asks, “Does distance help then?”

She seems to take his meaning, “It does. I started to appreciate working here rather than an office once I started using the Peacock.”

That put a new face on his father’s withdrawal from society after his mother’s so-called disappearance but, “He still sends you out though.”

She shrugs, “He also tries to stop me wearing the Miraculous. It’s complicated, but it’s not that he doesn’t care.”

He looks at her as if he could discern her secrets from her face. She’s been there for basically all his life but he wonders if he really understands Nathalie at all, “If you knew that why would you try to offer to die like that?”

Her brow wrinkles in apparent confusion, “I’m sorry?”

In front of the mother he’d lost it felt vital that he gained the knowledge to not lose Nathalie too, or Marinette for that matter, “If you did know we’d miss you _and_ you’ve already seen just how well we cope with loss why you think it was a good idea to leave us behind like that?”

“I think _you_ cope with loss quite well, it was one of the reasons I wanted your father to tell you what he was doing, I thought otherwise you might struggle with having your mother back after accepting that she wasn’t coming back.”

That’s not really an answer but he has to wonder, “Did you really think you were going to win?”

“At first I thought he was going to. He’s a very determined man your father. With the Miraculous and him putting his mind to bringing her back it was hard to imagine that he wouldn’t succeed.”

“Then we kept beating him.” He couldn’t help but have mixed feelings about that.

“Yes, and I started to realise that maybe he wouldn’t, but what could I do?”

“You could have stopped him.”

“ _How?_ He might listen to me about other things on occasion but on the subject of your mother I had no chance of changing his mind.”

“You could have turned him in. You could have let him get caught instead of becoming Mayura.”

“And be implicated? No one would believe I didn’t know. And _you,_ apart from the infamy you’d have been left a virtual orphan if your father went to jail. And the company would have folded, and believe it or not I do have friends of sorts working there who I’d rather not leave jobless. I’m sorry Adrien. I know you deserved better adults in your life but I’m a selfish woman.”

Something about that doesn’t seem quite right. She’d said she’d done it for herself and the people she cared about which was self-interested. Yet it seemed weird to call essentially purposely injuring yourself to save someone else selfish.

“You didn’t mention wanting to save him in that list.”

She gave a tired smile, “Alright that too. I’ve got too used to cleaning up his messes, and I was,” she hesitates, “overinvested in the situation by that point.”

“You know you never answered my original question, and you know it _would_ have been difficult losing you, even if I am apparently good at dealing with grief. Though honestly _anyone_ is good at that if you’re using my father as a comparison.”

Standing up she reaches out to him and then pulls her hand back, “Sorry.”

“I don’t mind.” He says, “You don’t have to never touch me until we get this fixed, just so long as you can remember which of us I am. Especially since it doesn’t look like Father’s going to appear to, you know, comfort me or anything does it?”

“Adrien,” she takes a step forward and hugs him, “he _is_ trying. He does _want_ to try. This is the first time in a while I can say that and believe it.”

He relaxed into it. It was still _odd_ having Nathalie be shorter than him, and he kind of missed the safety of what it would have felt like in his own body, but it wasn’t _that_ weird. Just as if he was hugging, ok not Ladybug or Marinette, but one of his other friends.

“And to answer your question, _yes,_ I knew or I suspected at least that my disappearance would hurt you, and that your father would, at least feel guilty about it. And, he’d probably struggle professionally until any replacement assistant found their feet.”

Adrien did not think that last part was a particularly relevant part to the conversation. You shouldn’t want to live for your _job._

Nathalie continues, “But I believed getting your mother back would more than make up for it, so I didn’t really consider that a reason not to do so.”

“I don’t think it works like that. We’d still have missed you.”

“Well, it doesn’t really matter now does it? You and your father have been quite clear in your opposition to the idea.”

Taking a step away so he can look her in the eyes he keeps a hand on her shoulder and says, “So you’re _not_ going to try that then? Seriously Nathalie I’ve lost my mother because _she_ wouldn’t stop with that Miraculous, I’ve almost lost my father because of his addiction to his. I can’t lose you too.”

“I don’t want to do any of that Adrien but,” she looks down at the floor, “I don’t know if I can promise you that. It all depends what happens.”

“Do you think he’s still going to continue?” A horrific thought came to his mind, “You don’t think feeling my emotions just now might make him _more_ likely to continue?”

It _hurts._ Looking at his mother lying there in this pod, whatever it was. He’d felt betrayed by his parents, and angry at both of them, and just _lost,_ but he’d felt a deep sadness underneath all that too at the realisation that what little hope he had had he now had to extinguish because he couldn’t let her come back like this.

And _that_ felt like exactly the sort of emotional feedback he _didn’t_ need to give his father.

“What if he’s up there akumatising someone _right now?”_

“He’s not.”

Her words break through his panic but, “how can you be sure?”

She reaches into her pocket and takes something out. Then she opens up her hand to show the Butterfly Miraculous.

Adrien can’t look away from it. “Is that?”

“Yes.”

“But, _when?_ Have you had it since the last time he transformed?”

Had his father not trusted himself not to break their truce?

She shakes her head, “No, he gave to me right before he ran off.”

“You weren’t exaggerating about it being overwhelming for him then.”

“Apparently not.”

A glimmer of hope appears to him, “Do you think, has he _given up?_ ”

Her hand closes back around it. “I wish I could say yes. I really do. But he gave it to _me._ I think if he was giving up for good he’d have given it to you.”

“Oh,” he can’t stop his disappointment, “You’d give it back to him then?”

“Probably.”

“But, despite everything we’ve talked about, you’d _go back to being Mayura?_ You’d fight _me?_ ”

“I,” she stops, “No I couldn’t fight you.”

“What, so would you try to just target Ladybug?”

She exhales. “I don’t know Adrien.”

“I couldn’t abandon her, if you fight her then you fight _me._ And I can’t let my father take our Miraculous either.”

“Look, I don’t want to fight either of you, I want him to stop just as much as you do.”

“But you won’t stop him for me? Even though it would be as easy as handing that over?”

He can see the tension in her jawline, but she puts the Butterfly Miraculous back in her pocket. Then she reaches into another one and takes out the Peacock Miraculous, “Here.”

He takes it automatically but, “What?”

“You’re right. I don’t want to fight you. If that makes you feel better, and safer in this house then it’s yours. But I can’t betray his trust by handing over _his_ without asking him.”

“And _will_ you ask him?”

“I can. It might come better from you. Or we can ask him together if you want.”

“You can ask him.” He’s not sure he could keep steady and level while doing that instead of giving in to his anger.

She blinks, “If you’re sure.”

“I am.” Then, “Do you think he’s ok? I mean he’s up there by himself, you don’t think he’s going to do anything stupid?”

A flash of concern flies across her face but she says, “I don’t think he’ll do anything _dangerous._ Stupid’s a different thing. _”_

“Do you want to go to him?”

“Are _you_ ok to be left alone?”

“I don’t know. I want to say goodbye to her, but I also want to just get away from here.”

“Come on,” she pulls at his sleeve, and somehow he doubts she does that to his father with his fastidiousness over his clothes, “Let’s go upstairs.”

* * *

He collapses into the chair in the living room suddenly feeling very tired.

“Any better?” Nathalie asks, and he realises that without her Miraculous she _does_ have to ask now.

“Not really.” He admits.

“With time perhaps,” she suggests.

“Yeah with time,” if he _gets_ time instead of his father deciding to pick his mother over Adrien. He knows he’d have Ladybug’s support and his school friends’ but that feels hollow compared to the prospect of losing what’s left of his family.

_His schoolfriend’s support._

Realising what that could mean gives him a chill.

“Nathalie?”

“Yes?”

It feels extremely awkward to ask but, “Did Father tell you that one of my friends liked me?”

“Marinette? Yes he mentioned it.”

Adrien _wished_ he’d been a fly on the wall for that conversation but, “The other day- when she came over father said that he’d felt an emotion from her that he’d felt from _you._ He was warning me. So. I guess what I’m asking is how do I tell a girl I’d never want to her to sacrifice herself for me?”

Her eyes widen, “I suppose you’d just have to tell her that Adrien, but,” for once she does look lost for words, “perhaps build up to that unless you’re in a situation where it seems like it might be immediately relevant?”

“But I need to make sure she _knows,_ what if something happens suddenly?”

“I can understand that but, Adrien, the thing is your father’s not very good at recognising positive emotions. He’s never tried to.”

“Have you?”

“At times. My Miraculous is a little different to his, I can work with different things. Mine wants to express any strong emotion, _his_ reaches out to people in need.”

“That’s not exactly how he uses it.”

“No. But the people he akumatised, they did feel they needed something, whether that was revenge or apparently to protect all the pigeons in Paris.”

“What is with that anyway?”

“I don’t want to know.”

“But you were saying?”

“So, unless your father _somehow_ got himself into a position at your school where she felt the need to protect him, which I’ll grant you isn’t impossible though he hasn’t admitted anything like that to me, it’s quite possible all he felt from your friend was fondness, or admiration, or concern.“

“You think he wouldn’t be able to distinguish those?”

There’s the faintest hint of a blush, “I’m fairly certain.”

Right. His father had honestly believed he and Nathalie were purely platonic until Adrien had pointed out otherwise. Which _yes,_ he’d had to have the same pointed out to him with Marinette, but then _he_ didn’t wear an emotion-based Miraculous.

“Maybe I should build up to that then.”

“That’s probably for the best,” glances at the door she says, “I guess I should probably go and check on your father.”

“Yeah, you probably,”

At that moment his father burst through the door, “Does Ladybug know you’re Chat Noir?”

“Uh?” Adrien’s so thrown by the question his mind takes a moment to put words together, “I don’t think so? _Why?”_

He really hoped this wasn’t some new plan of his father’s to gain his Miraculous.

A familiar haughty distrust greets him and he understands what Nathalie had meant about them each still having each other’s facial expressions, “Why did she come to see you then?”

“ _WHAT?”_ That drives all other thoughts out of his head, _“_ What do you mean _Ladybug_ came to see _me?_ ”

“She was literally at your bedroom window.”

“Why were you in my bedroom?”

“I was thinking about things.”

From the tear tracks on his face it seems like _thinking_ is code for _crying_ but he keeps that observation to himself. It still doesn’t explain why his father was in _his room_ though.

“And?”

“So I opened it to ask what on earth she was doing,”

“You what? Were you rude to her? What have you made Ladybug think of me?”

This _cannot_ be how his father manages to ruin his possible future relationship with Ladybug.

“ _That’s_ what you’re worried about out of everything I’ve done to Ladybug in the past?”

“No I’m angry about all of that but she’s not going to think that was me.”

Shaking his head in exasperation his father says, “Anyway, she claimed she was swinging by and noticed I was upset and wanted to check I was ok as part of her Akuma Prevention Service.”

“We don’t have Akuma Prevention Service.”

“Yes I thought that might be the case. Is this a common thing? Ladybug swinging round?”

“No?”

“Well I don’t suppose you’d tell me if it was.”

“What did you _say_ to her?”

“I said I was fine but that I had to go.”

That wasn’t the _worst_ thing he could have done, but given the worst thing was transforming and attacking her, that wasn’t staying much. Hopefully Ladybug just thought he was kind of awkward.

“I can’t believe _Ladybug_ is part of your harem. I feel like I could have used that.”

“Stop calling my friends that!” Wait, “You think _Ladybug_ likes me?”

How was this happening to him _twice?_

“I don’t know. Does she usually hang outside people’s bedroom windows?”

“You’re making it sound _weird._ I’m sure it was just what she said.”

“If you say so. I think on balance I prefer Marinette if we fix this and I unban you from dating. It’d be less awkward.”

He really hopes that isn’t because he’s living in some delusional world where Adrien is going to stay at home if his father decides to continue as Hawk Moth. “Seriously Father?”

“Ah sir,” Nathalie interrupts, “Can I talk to you?”

“Um, yes.” He agrees looking slightly startled, “Did you want to talk without Adrien?”

Nathalie eyes dart back to him and he gives her the most surreptitious nod he can, he doesn’t think he could face his hearing his father refuse to stop.

“Preferably.”

He gestures to the door and Nathalie follows him out. All he can do is wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Marinette, concerned over not being allowed to see Adrien yesterday & then hearing he did a photoshoot today: Look Tikki, I know this isn't what I'm supposed to use my powers for, but remember what happened when I tried to check on him and Lila as Marinette?


	13. Chapter 13

He continues to pace round the dining room, as Nathalie takes a seat, “Ladybug, Nathalie, _Ladybug_ is in Adrien’s little fan club.

He’s glad she’s sat down. This conversation is difficult enough without the constant dislocation of looking up at Nathalie.

She looks distinctly unimpressed, “Gabriel, Adrien models for _you,_ quite successfully, I don’t understand why him having fans is a surprise. You know we get fanmail.”

He tries to justify it, “I know he has fans. I just didn’t realise they involved my nemesis.” For all he knows there’s a letter from _Ladybug_ in that pile from Adrien’s fans. It’s _ridiculous._

God, if Adrien had known he might have already started dating Ladybug.

Her expression doesn’t change, “What _were_ you doing in Adrien’s room anyway?”

“I was thinking.”

“Thinking?”

“I almost akumatised him Nathalie.” He admits wanting to get it over with.

He waits for her judgement of his confession, because he’s done many things and she’s taken them all with aplomb but he’d known that what he was considering was a step too far. He doesn’t like what it says about him, especially when added to everything _else_ that’s come out these last few days. He doesn’t want to see that same condemnation in her eyes that he’s feeling..

And there _is_ shock, “What?”

“I was going to force him to help bring back his mother.”

Yet somehow as ever Nathalie doesn’t seem to judge him at all, “But you didn’t.”

“I didn’t, but I was so _tempted,_ you have to understand that; and Adrien he’d never have forgiven me would he?”

She doesn’t sugar-coat it, “No. I don’t think he would.”

He’d known that, but to hear the confirmation still gives him a dull ache, “I ended up in his room because, I wanted reassurance I suppose. Haven’t I given him everything he could want? Didn’t we try to give him the best in life? But it didn’t work. I don’t know where it all went wrong, but it has hasn’t it?”

“It doesn’t have to stay wrong.”

He thinks usually she’d take his hand then, but in the current circumstances he can understand why she wouldn’t.

“I’m no expert on children,” she continues, “But I don’t think it’s in providing materially for Adrien that we’ve the problem.”

He can’t help but be reassured by that we, and the reminder that he’s in in this totally alone.

“I do know Nathalie.” He sighs, “I’ve been telling myself bringing back Emilie would fix things, but if I continue down that path I’m going to lose Adrien aren’t I? Unless he’s changed his mind? He didn’t say anything down there after I left did he?”

She shakes her head. “He hasn’t changed his mind.”

“I don’t understand how he can see her and not be moved.” He just doesn’t understand Adrien, and he realises that’s his own fault.

“He _was_ effected by it, you know that, you _felt_ it.”

He had and that only makes it so confusing, “Why is it so easy for him to let her go?”

“Adrien’s not like us. He cares for other people.”

He and Nathalie have always been akin on their outlooks on the world but he corrects her, “You care for other people.”

She cares _too_ much for him and his family.

She shakes her head. “I care for _certain_ people. It’s not the same thing. And even if it was for him that includes Ladybug, and people we’ve akumatised, and,” she hesitates, “me. I might have made it worse when I tried to come up with solutions.” 

“We’ve not doing that.” In that he can understand his son’s reticence easier. It makes _him_ reticent now he knows it’s a possibility because it’s not one he can accept. 

She rolls her eyes. “In that you and Adrien are in agreement.”

“Of course we are.” He says annoyed at how lightly she continues to value herself. He really _is_ going to have to find some way to change her mind about that. He pushes the thought aside as something to think about later, “Nathalie, what did you want to speak to me about?”

She takes out the Butterfly, “Do you want this back?”

_Does he want that back?_

“I’m afraid Mayura won’t be able to help you if you do. I’ve given mine to Adrien.”

He can’t stop himself smiling, “Much as I’ll miss my dear peahen’s help, I can’t deny I’m relieved. I’d have brought Adrien in on the secret much earlier if I thought _that’s_ what would stop you using it.”

She doesn’t smile back, “Would you have, _really?”_

He can’t meet her eyes. “Perhaps not, but Nathalie I honestly didn’t realise how much of yourself you were willing to give to this. If I had then I would have done _something_ to take that Miraculous away from you.”

“Well, it’s away from me now.”

“It is.”

She puts the Butterfly Miraculous on the table, “He wants yours too.”

He suddenly realises he never questioned _why_ Nathalie had given hers up, he’d thought perhaps his and Adrien’s quite clear opinions on the matter of her attempted self-sacrifice had made the difference but maybe, “Did he give you some sort of ultimatum?”

“He didn’t force me to give mine up if that’s what you’re asking. I chose to when it became clear seeing Emilie wasn’t changing his mind. I want you to have her back, I want you to have your family back, but I’m not going to keep fighting him. And I don't think she’d want me to.”

He doesn’t know what she’d want, “She wouldn’t want to us to fight him, but then I can’t see that she’d want us to give up either. Emilie would probably expect me to convince me somehow and I don’t know how to do that.”

“I don’t know either. All I do know is that if you keep going you _will_ lose him. I can’t stop that.”

“Did he say that?”

“Effectively.”

He lets himself consider that. Whether he could accept losing Adrien as the price for regaining Emilie. To let Emilie go, _that_ would be a betrayal.

To bring her back to a world where their son would acknowledge neither of them would be a failure.

And, if the power he was using took _Adrien,_ in exchange for her then it would be a catastrophe. She’d never forgive him.

Nathalie sits there watching him silently, and with the possibility of giving up in the air he finds himself noticing things about her he’s never let himself before and _that_ is a betrayal too.

But regardless even if Adrien hadn’t pushed at it and exposed what was growing between them, even _,_ it still wouldn’t be right to reward what she’d done for _him_ by expecting her to take Emilie’s place either. He’d _never_ expected that of her, and when she’d brought it up it he’d been repulsed.

And of course just as with Adrien he can’t be sure that the Wish _wouldn’t_ take her as the price.

All of this might be moot anyway. Without her and with Adrien knowing who he is he doesn’t know if it’s even possible for him to win anymore.

Even if he did he can’t see what he’d been able to keep it all secret. He’d be exposed. Everything would fall apart. Everything he’s built would collapse.

This was supposed to put his family back together and right now he’s thinks that all being Hawk Moth has done is break it further apart.

_I’m sorry Emilie._

“What if I don’t want it back?”

There’s some emotion behind Nathalie’s eyes and without his Miraculous he can’t tell what it is. “Then we give it to Adrien.”

That hadn’t really been what he’d meant, “Wouldn’t I be failing her?”

“I think keeping it would be failing Adrien.”

He tries to explain, “Wouldn’t it make a mockery of everything we’re done? That all of it was for nothing? That I hurt _you_ for nothing? That all of this with Adrien was for nothing?”

“You did it because you _loved_ her, and you were willing to go further for her than anyone ever has. That’s amazing Gabriel and that’s always going to be true. If your limit is the son the two of you share that doesn’t diminish that. You’ve done _more_ than she could have expected, than anyone could have expected.”

“Do you mean that?”

“I do. I’ve never seen devotion like yours. I admired that even if I regretted what it led to.”

That catches his attention, “Is that why you were so willing to give everything for me?”

He’d certainly not been able to come up with any other good reason.

“The start of it certainly.”

“And yet you think I should give up.”

“It’s not my decision to make.”

She’s right but it’s not a decision he _wants_ to make. He wants to be told what to do, or forced what to do, or _something._

“You’re infuriatingly hard to read do you know that?”

His words don’t seem to faze her, “I try to be.”

“If I was to let Adrien have my Miraculous” he says slowly, “then _what then_?”

She cocks her head, “I suppose we try to put ourselves back together again.”

He has to ask, “Do you think we’re capable of that?”

He’s not sure his is. All his foundations are dissolving beneath him.

“I think you’re capable of anything you put your mind to. So long as it doesn’t actually include changing reality.”

“And I’d have you,” he corrects himself, “ _your support,_ in doing that?”

“Yes. Always.” She replies without any hesitance.

“And you believe Adrien wouldn’t betray us?”

“It seems very little to ask of him in return for our Miraculous and, I think from what he’s said _he_ wants _you_ back too.”

“Yes, I’d had that impression as well.”

He picks the Miraculous up off the table, it feels lighter than he expects, “Alright then, I suppose I’d better give this to my son.”

* * *

“Adrien,” he announces as he comes in the door to the living room making his son jump up in surprise, “I’m renouncing the Butterfly Miraculous.”

Adrien’s eyes widen as he takes the brooch from him and then, _then_ everything blurs, and if he was himself he’d think he’d lost his glasses then everything re-focuses and he’s looking at _Adrien_ through them.

He looks down at himself and those are _his_ hands, at the ends of the sleeves of _his_ jacket, and _his_ legs. He’s back in his own body.

Adrien gets there first, “We’re ourselves again.”

Adrien’s smile is mesmerising, and it’s _Emilie’s_ smile, and he can’t look away from the reminder that he still has some of Emilie right here in front of him.

“Oh thank god,” Nathalie suddenly exclaims, “If _that_ didn’t work I didn’t think anything would.”

Incredulously he asks, “Did you want me to give up my Miraculous so we could fix this?”

She holds out her hand in defence, “I wasn’t _lying_ in there. Everything I said was the truth, but” she nods in admittance, “I was hoping that you’d chose to do so and this would fix this.”

He should feel betrayed, especially since now he wonders if her giving up the Peacock Miraculous was an attempt to force his hand by depriving him of an ally but, but oddly he doesn’t. Perhaps it’s because he’s so giddy on the high of having his own body again that he doesn’t.

The fact that Adrien runs over to her and says, “Thank you,” throwing his arms around her waist doesn’t hurt matters.

She ruffles his hair, “I think you should thank your father.”

“He doesn’t have to,” because now he’s let go of the Miraculous and he’s seeing Adrien he can’t quite believe that he _was_ considering if he could fight his son, and that he almost used the powers of his Miraculous to force Adrien to do what he wanted.

Adrien clearly disagrees, letting go of Nathalie, and turning to him, “Thank you Father.”

He stiffens at first at Adrien’s embrace but then returns it. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s ok. And, I’ll work out something to tell Ladybug somehow. I won’t tell her what happened.”

He’s touched by Adrien’s filial loyalty finally making itself present. Perhaps he’d had to earn it.

“We can work something out together.”

“Yes. Together.”

Adrien let’s go of him, “Do you mind if I go video call my friends first? I want to make sure none of them are worried about me.”

He can’t see any reason to refuse him so he says, “Why not? Off you go.”

As Adrien leaves, he turns to catch Nathalie watching him go, and it seems like he’s finally found a way to make her smile after all.

“Come here,” he says.

Raising a quizzical eyebrow, she does so and he pulls her tight against him once she’s in reach. “I missed you.”

“I don’t remember going missing sir,”

“Gabriel.” He corrects her. Whatever they are to each other, whatever they’re doing right now he knows it’s got nothing to do with work.

“I don’t remember going missing _Gabriel._ ”

“You know what I mean,” he hadn’t realised how accustomed he’d gotten to the physical affection of their friendship until she’d withdrawn from him in Adrien’s body.

She laughs against him, “It was very confusing for me with the two of you like that. I know we don’t do anything that would be _wrong_ exactly if I got you the wrong way round but,”

“No I understand.”

It wouldn’t have been the _same_ anyway. Nathalie feels right in his arms now that he’s in his own body, like how it’s supposed to be, not like the embarrassment it was in Adrien’s body.

She smiles as she looks up at him and he’s suddenly very tempted to do something that would have been _very_ inappropriate before, but he manages to restrain himself. It’s too early. They should talk.

“That conversation you wouldn’t let us have before,” He starts.

Pouting in confusion and not helping his restraint at all she asks, “Conversation?”

“I believe you said you didn’t want to hear what I was going to say from Adrien’s face.”

“Oh,” She gasps, “ _That._ ” Regaining some sort of control she says, “I didn’t realise that was going to be much of a conversation.”

“I think it’s going to have to be quite a long one.”

“Gabriel,” She sighs and reaches up to his face with one of her hands, “You don’t have to. Not out of some sense of guilt or something. I wanted to help you, and I was ready to be the price for Emilie but that was my decision. You don’t have to feel obliged to say or do anything.”

He leans into her hand, “What if it’s not just obligation?”

He’s grateful to her yes, but to the extent he feels _obliged_ it’s that it feels urgent to him that on losing Emilie, and almost losing Adrien, he has to make it very clear to the woman in his arms that he doesn’t want to lose her too.

Her eyes darken and that sends a thrill through him but she says, “You’ve only just decided to give up your Miraculous. We don’t have to talk now. We can wait.”

“You’re right we probably _should_ wait,” He’s not completely unware that he’s clinging to what he still has through all this upheaval, and the sensible thing would be to let their emotions calm down but while he’s claimed to be many things sensible isn’t one of them, “But I don’t want to.”

“Gabriel,” she breathes out, “You know I’m not good at being the sensible one when it comes to you.”

“Don’t be.”

She gives the lie to her words by pushing him away, “Go shower. I don’t want to think about how much Adrien has or hasn’t in your body.”

That ruins the mood because Gabriel doesn’t either. He’d been forced to get the gel out of his hair but he’d tried to preserve Adrien’s privacy by keeping his underwear on.

“I’ll go see if he’s sleeping here tonight.”

“But he’s _him_ again now, and we’ve both given him our Miraculous.”

“And he’s nowhere to put them, and I don’t know how much he trusts us. It’d be a gesture of goodwill to offer.”

Despite himself, “I can see your point.” He reaches in his pocket for his wallet, “Where’s my wallet?”

“I can ask Adrien, why?”

“I was going to offer to let him go out for dinner with his friends to celebrate this. Get his bodyguard to supervise.”

“I’m not sure it’s over until he talks to Ladybug,” she must regret bringing that up for she adds, “but it’s a good idea.”

Perhaps she was right about time being needed because the possibility of regret for his choice looms, “Do you really think we can fix things with Adrien?”

“I do.”


	14. Chapter 14

Adrien felt like he was vibrating. He was _him_ again, and his father wasn’t going to be Hawk Moth anymore, and they were going to be a real family, and it was like all his wishes had come true. Except they were including things he’d never even thought to wish for before, because even in his life he’d never imagined any of this.

Alright so Ladybug _had_ thought his father might have been Hawk Moth before, and she _had_ been right, but on a scale of how bad that could have turned out really he thought it had turned out quite well.

“You can thank me later you know,” Plagg says from somewhere behind him and he twisted round and see his Kwami who seemed to be staying well out of where Adrien was jumping on the bed.

“Thank you!” He exclaimed and he _meant_ it and he thought Plagg could tell that, “Wasn’t it risky though? What if we’d been caught like that forever?”

“Trapped by someone else’s actions? I can’t imagine what that would be like.” Plagg rolls his eyes, “Seriously though where is my thank you camembert?”

Adrien climbs on his bed and goes to the mini-fridge he’d installed by his bed telling Nathalie it was for moisturiser and make-up storage when he’d ordered it.

“Here you are,” he says as he pulls the cheese out. “You know I know you’re capable of getting it yourself you know.”

“Why should I though?” Plagg takes it from his hand and then takes a bite, “You know kid, if Nooroo hadn’t thought there was anything redeemable in him I’d not have done it. I wouldn’t have done that to you for fun. ”

“I guess. I kind of seems like you were relying on him for a _lot_ though?”

“Eh. If it had looked impossible I’d have let you know that either of you could break it.”

“ _What?_ You said _he_ had to be the one to do it.”

“We lied.” Acknowledging the truth he adds, “Again.”

“ _Plagg.”_

“Hey, just because Nooroo thought he was capable of love for you doesn’t mean he trusted him to not manipulate you if you both knew either of you could perform an act of selfless love to fix it.”

Adrien collapses back onto the bed hit by the realisation, “He’d have tried to convince me to give him my Miraculous. It might have _worked._ ”

“I doubt it, you’re pretty responsible as my wielders go, but you can see why we didn’t tell you.”

“Yeah.” Adrien huffs, “Since you’re apparently some sort of super-mastermind now have _you_ any ideas how I’m going to explain this to Ladybug?”

Plagg munched at his cheese and didn’t answer.

Unable to bear the silence he points out, “I can’t just give her the Butterfly and the Peacock.”

“Why not?”

Adrien stares at him. “ _Why not?_ ”

“Give her them, kiss her, and then ride off into the sunset together.”

“Ok”, Adrien holds up his hand, “One, I can’t just give them to her, she’ll have questions,”

“That’s why you kiss her to distract her.”

“And two,” he says a little louder, “I can’t just kiss her.”

“I mean you can.”

“No I can’t, she doesn’t even _like_ me that way,”

“That’s not what you say normally.”

“Just because I have not admitted defeat on my quest to impress Ladybug until she falls in love with me doesn’t mean that I don’t know I haven’t succeeded yet. And now I don’t know if I _want_ to succeed because there’s Marinette. And unlike Ladybug she _is_ interested in me. And father said I had to commit to one of them,”

Plagg mutters under his breath, “because he’s so good at that.”

Ignoring him Adrien continues, “and yeah, I mean obviously his decisions are pretty yikes, and I’m,” former akumas they’ve fought flash through his mind, “not sure his planning skills are great either but I think he is actually right about this one thing.”

Just then his phone goes with a message from Nino, “Did u say something to Marinette???”

Adrien immediately rings him back. ”What’s happening with Marinette?”

“Uh,” Nino looks a bit startled by the call on his screen, “You look ok for someone who’s been off school ill.”

“I’ve recovered.” Adrien says as he draws on all his acting skills to get across just how unimportant that fact is, “Now, talking about the important things, _Marinette?”_

“You’ve know better than me dude.”

“Except I don’t know. I don’t know anything.”

“So you haven’t sent her something?”

“No,” He answers completely lost, when the terrifying idea that _maybe_ his father had done something trying to be helpful since he’d seemed to have come around on the subject of Marinette occurs to him. But he’d had his own phone the whole time so he couldn’t see how that could have happened. Something had to have happened though. “Did she say I had?”

“No, but something must have happened because she asked _both_ Alya and me if we knew if anything was going on with you, and seriously dude you owe me for keeping my mouth shut because it was hard.”

“But nothing’s happened? I haven’t messaged her, and I haven’t seen her and _you’re_ the only one I’ve spoken to about this.”

The last time he’d seen Marinette she’d thought she was speaking to his father, and he didn’t think he’d said anything particularly worrying about his health or anything then.

And as for his father the only time he’d been out in public was at the photoshoot and, _wait._

“I snapped at someone at a photoshoot. Could that have been it?”

He couldn’t see _why_ Marinette would know about that but she was interested in how the fashion world worked. Maybe she’d befriended someone, or the child of someone, who worked there and heard about his father’s outburst.

Which really was quite ironic from someone who always told _Adrien_ to mind his appearance in public.

Though he wouldn’t mind it if some people took on board what he’d been telling them.

“Seriously,” Nino makes a face, “Ignoring the idea of you snapping which I can’t even imagine, your dad had you doing a photoshoot when you were ill? That’s like child abuse or something, and like would they even be good photos?”

“They did offer to cancel it, but honestly I was fine today so I didn’t want to cause an issue.”

“No you,” Nino suddenly stops, “Wait if you’re _fine_ why didn’t you come back to school afterwards? _Is_ something going on with you?”

In what was perhaps not his best moment Adrien blurts out, “I wasn’t ready to see Marinette yet.”

“What.” Nino leans into the camera, “Let me get this right, you got ill, at some point during this your dad told you Marinette likes you, which sent you into a panic, and then you decided you couldn’t see her because of said panic and he _let you stay off school_ because of it?”

“Yep.”

“I am so confused by your life.”

He scrambles to explain this, “OK, to be fair you have to remember that he would be delighted if I announced I wanted to go back to homeschooling.”

“You think it was some sort of bribe? Let’s go back to homeschooling and you’ll have never to deal with confusing feelings about girls ever again?”

“Something like that.”

“That almost makes sense, but I am still lost on how your dad knew about Marinette, and why you were even talking about it.”

Deciding to go with ignorance Adrien says, “Honestly I have no idea how he knew either. Maybe Gorilla told him.”

“I’d like to say she’s not obvious enough for your bodyguard to notice but to be fair she is pretty obvious.”

He didn’t think she was but, “did _everyone_ except me know?”

“Uh, yeah.”

“Oh poor Marinette.”

“I mean most people were supportive? Except Chloé, and I guess Lila was convinced Marinette didn’t like her because she saw as competition.”

Adrien has a sinking feeling the latter is actually the other way round and he is deliberately not thinking about the implications of what Nino is saying about Chloé who’s more like a _sister_ to him than a possible girlfriend.

“Marinette’s not like that.” He defends her instead.

“Yeah, but I guess Lila doesn’t know that. Or maybe whatever disorder she has that makes her lie makes her paranoid?”

“Maybe,” Adrien makes plans to talk to her about it sometime in the future if his father hasn’t already scared her off.

“You still haven’t told me how it came up.”

_How did it come up?_

The best lies always have a bit of truth, “It’s kind of my fault. We were arguing because I caught him and Nathalie being all touchy.”

“Ew, gross dude I did not need to hear that.”

“Not in a weird way! But Father _hates_ people touching him, and he was all stressed and she put his hand on his shoulder and he calmed down. But when I asked about them again he went off on one about how they were just friends and it was disrespectful of me to imply things, and when I pointed out she liked him, _because it was obvious,”_ and it _was,_ “he said didn’t trust the judgement of someone who had no idea the derby-hat girl blatantly liked him.”

Nino blinks, “And him and her?”

“It’s complicated,” Adrien admits since he has no idea what is going on there, “Like I’m pretty sure he likes her but she heard that conversation so,”

“Ouch.”

“Yeah.”

“I just,” Nino is staring into the middle distance, “I’m having to re-adjust my theory that your parents took the wrong child home after visiting your cousin’s parents when you two were little.”

“You seriously thought Felix and I were swapped at birth?”

“Not at birth! Unless you’re secretly English or something? Please tell me you’re not secretly English? What if you started being obsessed with like roast beef or something?”

“I was born in France.”

“Good, but yeah, I Felix seems _way_ more like your father than you do.”

“I take after my mother,” it comes out without thinking and then he remembers where she was and what she’s done and couldn’t help but wince mentally, “but that is still a weird thing to think.”

“Compared to the rest of your life it’s not _that_ weird.”

“Yeah,” Nino has no idea how much, “You’re not wrong there, and,” the image of his father trying to dress as himself in Adrien’s body comes to the forefront of his mind, “I guess you have a point about my dad and Felix but I’m fairly sure I’m the original Adrien.”

“No yeah, I can believe that now because apparently the obliviousness is genetic.”

Adrien’s not quite sure that’s fair given their situations are _very_ different but he can’t say that to his friend so he agrees, “It could be.”

“I have to tell Alya this.”

“Nino! You agreed not to tell the girls until I worked out what I wanted to do about Marinette.”

“And have you?”

“No.”

“You’re gonna have to make a decision.”

“I know,” he looks away from the screen. “I will do. Just give me a little longer right?”

“Sure.”

“So,” he tries to track the conversation back on target. “Do you think it _was_ the photoshoot? Would Marinette even hear about that?”

“Yeah,” Nino’s voice sounds strained, “Maybe that was it. I mean she _is_ interested in fashion right?”

“Yeah that must be it,” Adrien smiles, “You can tell her I was just tired.”

It must be it because the only other person his father had seem as “Adrien” was Ladybug, and, _and,_ he needed to finish this phone call right now.

“Anyway I have to go, good speaking to you, bye!”

Rationally this did not mean Marinette was Ladybug.

Ladybug being here was could have been a total coincidence and nothing to do with Marinette being turned away before.

And he was probably just seeing what he wanted to see because if Marinette _was_ Ladybug then Ladybug _liked him,_ and he didn’t have to pick between either of them.

Though if Marinette _was_ Ladybug, _and_ she liked him then that meant _he_ was the guy Ladybug liked who didn’t return his feelings and if he’d already felt about not noticing or realising he kind of liked her before this made it so much worse.

Except again it was very very possible that Marinette was not Ladybug.

Even if she had come over because she was concerned about him he knew she’d offered Marinette a Miraculous once, it was possible Marinette knew her civilian self and she’d mentioned being worried about Adrien.

Marinette probably knows lots of people but if Marinette knows Ladybug from school then _he_ knows Ladybug but Marinette is the most Ladybug-like person at school. He’d called her an everyday Ladybug.

And really they were both very alike, very responsible and clever and creative; he could _see_ Marinette being the wielder of the Miraculous of Creation.

Plus they were also both really pretty. Really pretty _in the same way,_ and he knew it had to be more than just the mask that protected their identities, _Mayura_ proved that, but how could he not have noticed that Marinette and Ladybug _had the same hairstyle._

He’d never assumed it was the same because _his_ wasn’t, and hers had been different as Lady Noire, but what if her Kwami _didn’t_ change her hairstyle?

What if _Ladybug was Marinette?_

She probably wasn’t because Marinette was Multimouse, and he’d seen her and Marinette together which made her being Marinette impossible unless one of them was an illusion and.

Ladybug had access to the Fox Miraculous.

If only he could talk to someone about this, but obviously Ladybug was an impossibility and, much as he was so amazingly relieved about today he didn’t think it was a good idea to put temptation in front of his father but asking who Ladybug was.

As if he’d summoned one of them there’s a knock on his door followed by “Adrien?”

“Come in.” He calls.

“Hi,” Nathalie says, “I was going to check on you earlier but I could hear you were on the phone.”

“Did you stay and listen this time?”

“No, for goodness sake Adrien, I was _worried_ about you when I listened in on you and your father that time. Besides which I still probably wouldn’t have heard everything if you two had kept everything down a bit.”

He defends the two of them, “It was an emotional experience.”

“I can imagine that,” she looks him up and down, “Are you ok?”

He thinks he is. He thinks he _should_ be. “Yeah. Yeah I mean everything’s turned out great for me hasn’t it?”

Nathalie mustn’t kind be fooled, “You’re allowed to have mixed feelings about it. I know it has to be hard with your mother.”

“I’ll get over it, and hey at least we can grieve together this time.” That’s _something._ And his father isn’t going to be a supervillain any most. That’s another thing.

“Yes I suppose so.” She says.

He can’t help but wonder, “Is Father coping ok right now?”

She presses her lips together tense, and then says, “That remains to be seen.”

Uncertain he offers, “Should I?”

“No it’s fine. I’ll deal with it. He wanted to know if you wanted to go out with your friends actually.”

“ _Father_ wanted to know if I wanted to go out with friends?”

He knew he wanted to make things better but there was that, and then there was _this._

“He thought you might want to celebrate.”

“I’m not sure I want to celebrate yet.”

“I thought that might be the case.”

“Are you sure I shouldn’t check on him?”

“Don’t worry. It’s probably better you let him get his head together. It’s quite an adjustment for him. He’ll probably be a bit volatile.”

“ _You’ll_ be ok with him?” He asks concerned despite himself.

“I’m used to it,” She shrugs, “Anyway he and I have things to talk about, so.”

“Right.”

“Will _you_ be ok by yourself? We could,” she looks a little like she has no idea what to say, “try and spend some time together tonight?”

“No, no that’s fine,” He thinks Chat Noir needs to do some reconnaissance on Marinette Dupain-Cheng, “I’ll be fine.”

Nathalie doesn’t look quite convinced but she doesn’t argue with him either.


	15. Chapter 15

“You took a while,” he says as Nathalie lets herself into his bedroom.

She stills for a second when she takes him in sat on the bed in his pyjamas but whatever reaction he was hoping to elicit from her doesn’t come, as she continues into the room and takes a seat at the other end of it.

“Adrien was on the phone.” She explains, as she slips her shoes off and curls up her legs up beside her and part of him relaxes at the confirmation this conversation isn't happening on a professional level, “and I wanted to give you enough time to get ready too. And then I had to find you. Really I thought you’d have found somewhere better to have this conversation.”

Despite saying that now he notes that she had looked here, and she hadn’t seemed that shocked by his _presence,_ only the rest of it. So he ignores that, “How is Adrien?”

“He says he’s fine but I don’t know if we can believe him.”

“I thought he’d be happy.”

“I’m sure he is but, you _felt_ him down there didn’t you?”

“I guess,” he admits uneasily. It’s easier to pretend that Adrien _wasn’t_ effected by seeing his mother like that. That _that_ was why he found it so easy to let her go, while Gabriel’s refused to consider it really until all of this. That Adrien grieves her too and yet is still able to be sure the choice he’s making is the right one even though it means they’ll never see her again is a bitter pill to swallow.

“And you weren’t there to see he after you left, it _has_ hit him hard-especially since he didn’t know any of it. I think he must have a lot mixed feelings about it.”

“Ah,” and part of him wants to suggest that Adrien could still change his mind but _no_ he has made a decision that he has to believe is the correct one and for once he’s not going to make it worse, “I guess he doesn’t want to go out then?”

His eyes slide over to the door and he wonders if he should have locked it, but Adrien’s a polite boy and is unlikely to come barging in here without knocking. They should have privacy for what they need to discuss.

That was part of why he’d stayed here. That and he thought it might crack Nathalie’s defences. He’s been unable to understand her _with_ a Miraculous. He doubts he’ll do well without.

“No.” Nathalie’s fingers fiddle with each other in her clasped hands and he wonders if she’s aware she’s doing it in front of him, and not behind a desk or her back, “I did wonder if we should leave him alone but then I wasn’t sure how _you_ were, and I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s more friends he wants to talk to. I think the time away from them has been difficult for him.”

“He’s going to have to learn to deal with not seeing his friends for a few days, or however will he get through life?” he responds automatically, but then guilt edges in at the fact that _Nathalie_ has thought of Adrien’s wellbeing more than he has. If Emilie could see any of this she might be angrier at his treatment of their son than of his giving up on her. Or at least it would be a close call. “We could go check on him later.”

Nathalie gives him the barest hint of a smile, “That’s a good idea. We should do that.”

Unsure what to say in response, because thanking her for agreeing would sound stupid they fall into silence.

Eventually he can’t bare it; he had her come here because he has questions to ask and he’s going to ask them. “Was Adrien right?”

She tilts her head slightly as if she’s trying to work out his meaning, “What?”

“Are you in love with me?”

“ _What?”_ He’s certainly managed to break through her usual mask of neutrality now, “You didn’t tell me Adrien said _that._ ”

“Yes, I did. You refused to answer me if I remember correctly.”

“No,” she says firmly, “You _said_ Adrien said I had feelings for you.”

“Isn’t that the same thing?”

“No! No it’s not, god, there’s a difference between him realising that we’re gotten closer, and _that._ ”

He’s not sure there is but it’s not important, he’s not looking for a philosophical discussion of love, he just wants to know, “Are you though?”

She looks away from him. “Does it matter?”

He wants to reach out and bring her eyes back to him but he resists, and just states the obvious instead. “Of course it matters.”

“Why?”

Thrown by her response he doesn’t have an immediate one himself, and watches in horror as she looks back at him _yes,_ but also straightens up and clasps her hands behind her back, and his confidante through all of this is gone and replaced by his assistant.

“Why does it matter?” She says, “Are you planning to fire me?”

“ _Fire_ you?” The very idea of watching Nathalie pack up her things and leave the Atelier forever distresses him, “Why on earth would I fire you?”

“It’s not very appropriate feelings to have for your superior is it? Probably not conducive to an efficient workplace environment.”

“As far as I know the only way you’re acted on it is trying to sacrifice yourself for me and I’m fairly certain that’s not a fireable offence. It certainly wouldn’t get through any employment tribunal.”

She smirks, and he relaxes as he sees he’s coaxed her back out, “I think if you’re talking about being Hawk Moth in the legal system then we’re got bigger problems than my feelings.”

“Probably,” he agrees, “You should have told me though.”

“Why on _earth_ would I have done that? I knew what we were fighting for.”

That’s fair and he doesn’t know what he would have done if she had. He can’t pretend he wouldn’t have been offended or that he’d have understood why she’s said anything. Maybe he _would_ have fired her, except maybe that would have been a good thing because it might have saved her because, “I might have understood better that you’d got this ridiculous idea in your head.”

“That’s a change of tune from earlier.”

“What?” Then he realises how she’s taken it, _“_ Not _us,_ this idea of you paying the price to bring Emilie back. I had no idea you were even considering it,” He had no idea about a lot, about her and Adrien _both._ He must be one of the worst wielders of the Butterfly Miraculous ever, “I still don’t understand why you’d think of it.”

“Well I don’t understand why it’s such a shock or an issue for you Gabriel. I was taking my life in my hands each time I put the Peacock Miraculous on. It’s not that different. I could have ended up in the same place regardless, I,”

“No,” He interrupts her, “It _is_ different. There’s a difference between something being a possibility and something being definite, and anyway _you know_ that I didn’t like you using the Peacock Miraculous.”

“You didn’t stop me.”

“I _tried,_ you’re the one who forced my hand on that.”

“Right,” She rolls her eyes, “You _tried._ I’m sorry if I don’t consider putting it in places I know the location of in this house much of an attempt.”

“What was I supposed to do? None of that meant I wanted you _dead._ ”

She huffs, “You were willing to terrorise Paris using ancient magic you’d retrieved from halfway around the world to chase after the elemental forces of creation and destruction to revive Emilie, and you couldn’t even think of any way other than putting it in the safe to stop _me_ from using that Miraculous? I’m sorry but I think that makes it _very_ clear where I rank in your priorities. I had no reason to believe you’d do anything other than what you did with the Peacock Miraculous if we won; put up a show of contrition and tell me I don’t have to do it, and then go along with it in the end.”

Her words hit like a punch to his solar plexus.

“I never managed to stop Emilie using it either,” he sighs, “Maybe that made it too easy to assume I couldn’t stop you either. But you’re _right._ I should have done more. I was so focused on saving Emilie that I ignored everything outside that narrow focus, I didn’t see what I was doing to you, or what I was doing to _Adrien._ ”

“Gabriel,” her face has softens.

“I’m _glad_ I didn’t win,” he realises, “Had we defeated them, had I got those jewels we were fighting for all this time then I might have got Emilie back but I’d have lost my son because he’d never have forgiven me would me?”

“He wouldn’t.” She agrees.

“And I’d have lost my,” assistant doesn’t feel like the right word at all right now, “closest friend without understanding why” He reaches out and takes her hand, “I don’t think it would have been worth it.”

She gives his hand a reassuring squeeze back, “It’s alright. You _didn’t._ You managed to stop before it was too late.”

He had, but he’ll always be terrified at how close to the precipice he’d came. At what he could have lost. At what he would have brought Emilie back to. An Adrien permanently estranged from them would have broken her heart. And he doesn’t know if he’d ever have been able to look at her without blaming her for that, and for Nathalie’s death.

Nathalie’s waiting patiently for his response and he wants to be sure she understands that, that she sees herself the way he does, “I never wanted what you offered. I do value you know. I’ve always valued you as an assistant but since Emilie’s death that’s changed, you’re become the only person I can talk honestly to, I’ve relied on you for far too much for things that have _nothing_ to do with your job, you’ve been more than a parent to Adrien than I have. You _are_ vitally important to me.”

Her eyes glisten behind her glasses and she thinks she might cry but she all she says is, “I know.” She swallows, “I mean some of it I only realised at your and Adrien’s response to my suggestion but I do know now.”

“What about you, how long?”

“What?”

“How long have you been,” he can’t force himself to say it. He’d said it earlier but now her reticence seems to have infected him.

She takes his meaning though, and this time this doesn’t deny it. “Oh I don’t know. To misquote a book I was in the middle of it before I realised.”

He lets her think.

“I’ve always admired you,” she copies his own phrasing, “your creativity and how you built the company,”

“I wouldn’t still have it without you,” he interrupts.

“Probably,” she agrees, “and frankly you annoyed me a lot too because you could be a total pain of a boss so don’t let _that_ go to your head. But,” she sighs, “when you lost Emilie I was worried for you. And I mean _for you_ not just for what it meant for the company. Then when you announced you were going to get her back, like I said earlier I’d never seen devotion like that, certainly not aimed at _me._ I wanted to be a part of that I suppose. I wanted you to have your Happily Ever After when you were willing to do more to get it than anyone I’d ever met. And then after I used the Peacock Miraculous you were so kind, and you looked at me like I was something you treasured, and I realised that maybe I wanted that for _me_ too. Except I didn’t because that would tarnish the whole thing that drew me to you in the first place.”

There’s too much there for him to process but there’s one disturbing implication he has to understand,

“You weren’t,” he forces it out, “using the Peacock Miraculous, injuring yourself deliberately, because you wanted to provoke that were you?”

“No,” she exhales, “Like I said that was pretty conflicting for me. I might have enjoyed you looking after me but that didn’t outweigh the actual physical pain, or the guilt I felt. I used that because I wanted to help you achieve your goal.”

The goal he’s abandoned.

“Am I no longer the man you fell for now I’ve given up then?”

“Oh Gabriel no,” She takes his free hand and meets his eyes, “You made the right decision. Making the choice you did today was _never_ going to damage my opinion of you.”

“I couldn’t have made it without you, you know.” He tells her.

She disagrees with him, “I think you could have. It was _your_ decision. All I did was give you a push.”

“And give me someone to talk through it with and,” he has to admit it, “When I was tempted, to akumatise Adrien, knowing what winning would do to you made it easier to resist. Thank you.”

“I’m glad I could do that for you.”

“And you _are_ happy with how things have turned out?”

She frowns slightly, “Yes I just told you that.”

“Then,” he feels unmoored, and pulls one of his hands out of her grip to cradle her face, “You do still want me.”

She moves her head away from him and lets go of his other hand and it feels like he’s losing her, “No.”

“No? But,”

“Not like this. Not when I don’t even know how I’m feeling. Not with Emilie down there below us still. Not with everything unresolved with the Miraculous. Not while we should be focusing on repairing things with _Adrien,_ not with us. Not when _you_ haven’t had the time to process any of this, and you don’t know what you want.”

“I,”

“No,” She stops him, “You’re not thinking clearly. You’ve barely let go of Emilie and now you’re clinging to what you have left. I might not have much self-respect but I’m not going to let you use me as your rebound when you’ll only regret it later. I’ve made a lot of mistakes for you. I’ve enabled _your_ mistakes, but I’m not going to enable this one.”

“You wouldn’t be a mistake.”

“Wouldn’t I? I’m sorry but I think how you’ve suddenly changed gears about me doesn’t exactly indicate you’re that stable.”

“I don’t know what I have.”

“Gabriel. I can believe that I’m, what did you call me? Your closest friend? But you’ve never even thought of being attracted to me until today, you don’t have to pretend you are because you know _my_ feelings and you care for me.”

“This _again?_ I don’t know why you keep saying it but I’ll finish that sentence you wouldn’t let me before. You’re very pretty.”

She blinks, “ _That’s_ what you were going to say? I probably could have let you say that as Adrien. In fact I think Adrien _has_ said that to me once when you bullied me into a dress.”

“And he was right to. You looked lovely. You should let me style you more. Not that you’re not attractive as you are.”

“I’m aware. I mean not that I think I’m going to give any of the models a run for their money, but I think objectively I’m pretty decent looking.”

He’d argue she’s more than decent looking but, “Why did you say that then?”

“I didn’t say I wasn’t attractive.” She says looking deeply unconvinced, “I said _you_ weren’t _attracted_ to me. God, I’m not offended or anything. I’ve seen you be not attracted to supermodels.”

“I was _married,_ ” he exclaims, “Noticing anyone else would have been a betrayal. That doesn’t mean I’m blind I,” he hesitates than barrels ahead, “There’s a reason I’ve been so defensive whenever Adrien’s brought up the topic, because he was hitting on something I was repressing because I couldn’t let myself admit it while I still thought I could get Emilie back.”

“Oh,” she says but she doesn’t add anything.

“So,” he says leaning in towards her, “How about it then?”

She pulls away from him, “That still doesn’t make this a good idea. If I had any sense I should probably leave this house and my job, but I care too much for you, and for Adrien to do that while things are still like this. Please don’t make this harder for me.”

At the spectre of her leaving he can no longer hold it in, “But I can’t lose you.”

“See,” she smiles weakly, “That’s exactly why this isn’t a good idea. You’re concentrating on the wrong reasons. You’re not going to lose me, you don’t have to do whatever your plan was.”

“But I worry about you. Now that I know how little self-worth you seem to have. I want to have the right to worry about you, I want to be able to help you. I wanted to spoil you”

“And you thought a relationship with you would fix that?” She shakes her head, “You know you can still do that if you want, and anyway I was ready to trade myself for one specific thing. I’m not going to just throw myself off a building or something.”

“I don’t think I can do all of it.”

She raises her eyebrows.

“I wanted to convince you of the advantages of life, to take care of you in ways that would be _very_ inappropriate otherwise, to,” he puts his hand on her thigh, and lets it rest there when she stills but doesn’t make a move to displace it, “I wanted you to enjoy yourself.”

Her eyebrows have almost reached her hairline, “You mean?”

He nods.

She moves his hand, “Sorry, just give me a moment.”

Then she collapses forward onto the bed and starts shaking.

“ _Nathalie?”_ He panics, and tries to roll her over, and she’s…laughing.

This isn’t what he’s meant when he’s wanted to bring happier expressions to her face.

“What the hell?” She breaks back down into laughter, “I can’t believe,” she gasps for air, “That you thought,” more laughter, “oh my god, do you think you have some magical healing,” she has another fit of giggles. “That was a _terrible_ plan.”

Insulted as he is the image of her on the bed below him isn’t convincing him it’s a bad idea _at all._

“What do _you_ want then?” He asks her as she finally seems to catch her breath back.

“I think we should just continue as we are for now, and see how things develop and, then maybe if we both want in the future we can revisit this. This isn’t a no never, it’s a not yet.”

“I suppose I can understand that,” he agrees much as he rues her choosing _now_ to be sensible, “Though I must warn you that Adrien doesn’t think we act very platonically anyway.”

“ _What?_ As _Gabriel and Nathalie?_ We’ve been friendly but I didn’t think there was anything more.”

“I didn’t notice it either,” he agrees, “but what do you mean as Gabriel and Nathalie?”

“Well, if he’d said Hawk Moth and Mayura I could understand it.”

He couldn’t, “You could?”

“Yes?” She frowns, “Did you, _not know,_ you were more affectionate as Hawk Moth? I thought that was part of the act.”

“ _No._ ” Bursts out of his mouth without permission, “That wasn’t anything deliberate at all.”

Her eyes widen slightly, “That makes it easier to believe you were repressing things then?”

“But you still won’t kiss me?”

“No.”

“Pity. I was very careful to shave. I don’t think Adrien did it at all. I’m lucky I’ve never been one to grow much of beard.”

Nathalie’s frown changes to a subtly different one. “Does Adrien _know_ how to shave? He’s going to have to soon enough.”

“I don’t know.” 

“Admittedly I never had a brother so I don’t really know but, isn’t that _your_ job to teach him?”

“You might be right.” He can’t remember if his father had ever shown him or how he’d learnt, but he supposes that makes sense.

“Well, you were trying to think of things to do with him.”

“Yes that sounds like it’s going to be great fun.”

Nathalie glances at the door. “You should probably go check on him, like you said you would.”

“Yes,” he exhales, “You’re probably right. Wish me luck?”

“Good luck.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So MS Word ate the first version of this, and in some what this version _is_ better but then also there were phrases I can remember that I have no idea where they went.


	16. Chapter 16

Adrien watches Marinette’s balcony from the rooftop across the street. What he’s really expecting he doesn’t know. Even if Marinette is Ladybug, and even if she does exit from her roof when she’s transformed the chances of her deciding to come out while he was there and watching wasn’t all that high, without any akuma or anything. 

And he does know that using the Butterfly Miraculous to send out an akuma just to lure Marinette out isn’t a good idea.

Besides he isn’t even sure if he could. He hadn’t exactly asked his father how the Butterfly Miraculous worked and some butterflies had flown past in that tomb of a room below the house his mother lay in which suggests that the wielder doesn’t just magically generate them.

But without an akuma there wasn’t much he could do. His Miraculous did enhance his eyesight, and now he thought about it he wondered if his father and Nathalie’s transformations did much more in that capacity given neither of them had any glasses or goggles transformed, but it the mainl difference in his case was just his amazing night vision.

Unfortunately it isn’t any particular help when it comes to watching a girl in a brightly lit room through her window on the other side of the street.

It sounded creepy when he thought about it like that.

But this is utterly vital research for how his life was going to work out in so many different ways, and if it got weird then he’d just look away.

No that he could see much anyway. He really should have brought binoculars or something.

Thinking might have made it weirder though.

Oh. She’s coming out to her little balcony. Marinette that was. Not Ladybug. Although maybe Ladybug. But she wasn’t coming out as Ladybug.

This is all very confusing.

All Marinette’s doing is watering her flowers which isn’t exactly evidence of anything but it’s nice actually seeing her again. He’ll have to thank her for coming over to see him when he was “ill”.

As Adrien though obviously. Not as Chat Noir. That would be an awkward way for everything to come out. He’s definitely coming to have to come up with a better way to reveal his identity. Preferably a romantic one. Especially as his original idea of their grand reveal after the finally defeated Hawk Moth and on the high of the excitement Ladybug would agree to come out with him clearly wasn’t going to happen.

That made his mood sink.

If Plagg and Nooroo hadn’t interfered he mightn’t have discovered his father was Hawk Moth until Ladybug and Chat Noir had finally defeated the supervillain. He might have reached out to their enemy to take back that brooch for his lady and been greeted by his father’s face.

And that might have been one of the best possible endings.

Miraculous Ladybug could fix a lot of things but even if they both ended up physically ok they’d both still remember everything they’d done to each other.

And they’d know it whenever they saw it other in a way that he hadn’t really yet because he knew his father was Hawk Moth but he’d never actually seen him transform into him. Not as himself. Mini-Hawk Moth was a totally different kettle of fish.

He wasn’t sure what sort of relationship they’d ever be able to build after that.

Even if something unforgivable hadn’t happened he couldn’t help realise what the consequences could have been. As it was he felt that losing his mother felt like punishment enough, but if this had gone on, if his father had been unmasked in public, then he guessed his father-and Nathalie would have ended up in prison.

And he, he wasn’t sure what would have happened to him. Unless he was an adult when it happened he supposed Aunt Amélie was his closest relative. She’d have been happy to take him in he was sure but he didn’t want to go live in a different country without all his friends and without Ladybug.

Or maybe he’d get to stay in France but in boarding school in the school term. That hardly felt any better.

The horrible future he was imagining is knocked out of his head by an entirely different type of panic when Marinette waves at him.

She should not be able to do that. He’s dressed in black on a dark night against a dark roof.

Clearly either his hair or eyes have betrayed him.

He waves back without any better idea of what to do.

Then she makes a face, throws her arms up in the air in exasperation, and then gestures for him to go over.

Given it would probably be really rude to ignore her now, and look even weirder if he ran off he braces himself and leaps for the roof beside her.

Not for the balcony itself. He’s not taking the chance of ruining her plants.

“Hey Princess?”

It didn’t sound quite as suave as he’d been going for.

She raises an eyebrow, “Are you spying on me Chat Noir?”

“..No?” He plasters on his best smile, “Just making sure my favourite Purrisienne is ok.”

Concern wells up in Marinette’s big blue eyes, “Are you ok Kitty?”

He doesn’t know why that didn’t work. He’s won magazine competitions with that smile. It should have worked.

“I’m fine.” At his clear disbelief he adds, “Really.” It might have come out better if he hadn’t sounded kind of manic.

Marinette looks at him as if she’s searching for something then says, “I’m glad you’re you again, what happened there anyway?”

It takes all his effort not to narrow his eyes at her. It’s not weird that she knows about it. He had had to venture out for that akuma attack. So that she’s asking could just be her honestly asking what had happened. Then again it could be Ladybug wondering if he’s going to tell Marinette the same thing he’d told her or not.

“It’s complicated.” He tells her. “Magic stuff.”

“Can you talk about it?”

“I don’t think Ladybug would be happy with me if I did.” He chances. It’s something that would sound totally plausible to Marinette, and completely a lie to Ladybug.

And there, there’s the faintest twitch in Marinette’s expression.

“Obeying your actual favourite Parisienne for once then?”

He leans in closer, “I’m a very tame cat I’ll have you know.”

There’s a gratifying flush on her face as she steps back and says, “Are you hungry?” then “I’ll go get something.” Without waiting for him to respond.

He’s not really sure if he’s hungry or not. They’d missed dinner with the whole handover of the Miraculous but his stomach feels odd like it’s missing from his body and he doesn’t know if he wants to eat anything.

On the other hand he thinks, as Marinette appears with a bunch of croissants, Marinette’s parent’s baking is really good.

“Sorry,” She says, “They’re what’s left at the end of the day. You really should come first thing if you want them fresh.”

“Maybe I will one day,” he says with a wink.

“You know Chat,” and she slightly blushes again, “I’m really glad you’re you again.”

The quip, “Did you miss my handsome face?” comes out of his mouth before he can even think about the fact that he’s flirting with a girl who he knows likes him as Adrien and who may or may not be the girl he’s been crushing on for ages, and that to be fair about the first thing he should probably work out the second.

“Absence makes the heart grow fonder,” she jokes back, and her voice is slightly higher than normal maybe, but it’s a good response and he doesn’t understand how Adrien can fluster her without even flirting, while Chat Noir can’t when he is, “so don’t get too big a head.”

Still she is a little flustered. So he doesn’t think him being Chat Noir would make her disinterested in Adrien.

“Wouldn’t want to ruin my appearance doing that, no.”

“It sounds like you’re well on the way to having one anyway.”

“I’ll have you know it’s a general consensus that I’m very good looking.”

“A general consensus amongst your fans?”

Both sets actually. “Hey, I meant out of costume too.”

Marinette shrugs, “I’m not going to disagree since I’ve never had the chance to see you without that mask, but yeah, a proper haircut and I’m sure you could break even more hearts.”

He stills. Was that statement about his hair deliberate?

“Hoping for more of an Adrien Agreste style?”

Marinette looks like her face can’t decide what expression to make, “Yes, no, I don’t,” before she finally manages to say, “That would probably really suit you, but I think it would be too confusing for everyone.”

“Too confusing for everyone or for you Princess?”

“Chat?!”

One of his posters catches his line on his wall. “Hey, Adrien and I could do a campaign together so you could have both of us up on his wall.”

Marinette doesn’t respond and for a moment he thinks he’s broken her. “Um, Marinette?”

She frowns, and huh, that does kind of remind him of Ladybug threatening an akuma. “Don’t even think about saying that to him.”

“OK, OK,” he holds his hands up in surrender, “I won’t.”

As he chews on a croissant and he lets myself get lost in the melting buttery taste in his mouth, she suddenly asks him, “Why were you really on that roof?”

“Does it matter?”

“I mean, if you were going to contact Ladybug to explain that you’re fixed whatever happened to you then I don’t want to keep you away.”

“Don’t worry. I wasn’t planning anything like that.”

She looks unimpressed. “Shouldn’t you?”

“I will let Ladybug know. Honestly. I’ve just a lot to think about first.” An awful lot, because he still has no idea how he’s going to explain any of this to Ladybug without admitting how they are.

Her voice is gentler this time, “Was that why you were out there then?”

He nods. “I just wanted to get out of the house.”

“Oh,” Marinette sounds really worried now, “Are things ok with your family? I know you can’t tell me anything identifying but if talking helps I’m here to listen. Or I won’t be offended if you want to go to someone you can talk to.”

“That’s really nice of you,” but he can’t talk to anyone except the other people involved and he has no idea how to explain to her that things are simultaneously terrible and the best they’re ever been at home. He wants to say something though he wants to say, “My mum’s dead. Dying.”

“Um,”

He rushes to give an explanation of that that makes sense and it’s a lie but it’s not, “She’s been on life support a while, but it’s an incurable coma and we decided to turn it off.”

Marinette gasps, “I had no idea, I’ve been sitting here joking with you and,”

“No it’s fine.” He cuts her off, “It’s um, good actually. I needed the distraction.”

He gets more of one when she flings herself at him in a hug, and he is so deeply relieved to be himself again, “I’m so sorry Chat.”

“It had to happen,” he says.

“It sounds like you’re trying to convince yourself of that.”

“I know it did,” and the tears he’d been holding back for hours finally make their appearance, “I just feel so guilty about it.”

Marinette looks up him, “Why should you be guilty? It sounds like your family made a choice they needed to?”

“We did, but,” and the thought won’t leave his head, “My father made that choice for me, I don’t think he would have done it otherwise,” he was pretty damn sure he wouldn’t have, “What if he regrets it later and blames me?”

“Hey,” Marinette takes a little step away from him and grips his shoulders, “He has no right to do that do you hear me? Putting it off was only putting off the inevitable, and if he really didn’t want to do it he wouldn’t have done it. It’s not like a hospital would let you make the decision by himself. And if he does forget that I will come and yell at him for you.”

“The whole secret-identity thing might be a problem with that.”

“I’ll wear a blindfold if you bring me there then,” she says with fury in her eyes, “And I can tell you Ladybug would do the same.”

She’s still so very close to him, and right now with that unconditional affection and defence she’s offering him he doesn’t think he cares if she’s Ladybug. She’s Marinette. And she’s ready to fight for even of his identities.

He pulls her closer, inclines his head down, and kisses her.

The noise of shock she makes, makes him realise what he’s done, and he would pull away except she pulls him closer and her mouth opens to his.

When they stop it feels like it’s a mutual agreement.

When their eyes meet it’s in mutual horror.

“I shouldn’t have done that,” he says.

Almost simultaneously she says, “I’m sorry.”

“I think that should by my line,” he disagrees, “I kissed you. And I know you like someone now,” In retrospect the posters on her wall make that very clear. He is an utter idiot. And he might have just completely ruined things. “And that I rejected you before and I shouldn’t have done it.”

“I let you,” she disagrees, “And I knew you were grieving and confused.”

“It shouldn’t have been your job to stop me.” She’s the victim here if anything.

“No,” she agrees, “But I’m pretty sure you would have stopped immediately if I’d asked you to.”

“Yeah, yeah of course I would.”

“I do like you Chat Noir.” She says, “Really. And you deserve to have a girl that likes you, and that can like you back. But with everything I don’t know if that can be you and me.”

“Yeah,” he realises, “I guess there’s too many secrets between us.”

And that’s going to be true whether he dates her as Chat Noir or as Adrien. He’d thought the choice was between Ladybug or Marinette but maybe his real choice is whether he can date any girl while hiding so much from them.

Thanks for that Father. Looks like you didn’t have to ban me from dating to ruin that for me.

“Look, you and Ladybug will defeat Hawk Moth one day, and then things will be different.”

“Yeah.” He lies, “Things will be different.”

Neither of them seem to know where to look.

He finds himself looking around her room. It seems messier than the last time he saw it as Adrien. There’s homework on her desk, and what looks like a sewing project draped over her bed, though he can’t quite work out what it’s meant to be yet.

Marinette has apparently been looking somewhere else, “That pouch on your belt is new.”

“Can’t hide anything from the designer,” he jokes even as it suddenly feels very heavy with the Peacock and Butterfly brooches lying inside it. “Thought maybe I needed a bit more storage.”

It hadn’t been as if he could have hidden them in the house, and his costume doesn’t exactly have tons of rooms for pockets. Anyway belt bags are very in this season.

“Yeah, I can get that.” She agrees. “Those outfits don’t exactly look likes there’s loads of space in there.”

Feeling slightly more comfortable he laughed, “No, there isn’t.”

“I should go take this plate away,” Marinette says picking it up and leaving the room.

He’s still oh so aware of the brooches his carrying and Ladybug trusts Marinette even if she isn't her, and he can’t leave them in his house, and really Marinette wouldn’t even need to know. He takes out the brooches, he's sure that he could hide them somewhere here, and recover them later.

And then if Marinette did find them he’s fairly sure she wouldn’t misuse them.

And if she is Ladybug maybe she’ll think Hawk Moth surrendered in some way that has nothing to do with him.

Then again, the Peacock Miraculous glints up at him, and he can’t risk Marinette using that.

“Chat?” her voice startles him from the trapdoor, “What’s that in your hand?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have regrets about committing to an alternating PoV format for this fic.


	17. Chapter 17

“Adrien?” Gabriel knocks at his son’s door.

There’s no response.

“ _Adrien?”_ He tries again.

His son _could_ be asleep. Or he could be ignoring him.

Or Adrien might not be there.

He knocks again. Still no response.

He pushes the door open. If Adrien didn’t want him to come in then he’s had plenty of chances to stop him now, and if he _is_ just asleep then there’s no harm done.

Except the light is on. So he’s probably not asleep.

In fact he doesn’t appear to be _anywhere_ in the room.

And the window is open.

He does take a circuit of the room as if Adrien could possibly be hiding in his wardrobe or something, or in the bathroom but Adrien doesn’t seem to be anywhere in this room.

The window doesn’t _necessarily_ mean Adrien’s ventured out as Chat Noir. He might just have come to get something to drink or a snack from the kitchen but he can’t help but think otherwise.

Pulling his phone out he rings Adrien’s number; the phone rings but then it goes to Adrien’s voicemail.

Trying to convince himself that it could just be nothing he calls Nathalie instead, “Adrien’s missing.”

“ _What_?” Her voice comes down the line, “What do you mean he’s missing?”

“He’s not in his room, his window’s open and he’s not answering his phone.”

Nathalie’s silent for a moment, then she says, “He’s not _necessarily_ missing.”

“I know, will you help me check the house?”

“I’ll take downstairs, you check up here.”

* * *

Their eyes meet when he’s descending the stairs and she’s still in the foyer and he knows she hasn’t found him even before she says anything.

“I thought I might see if he’s gone to visit Emilie,” he explains.

“That’s a good idea.” She agrees.

* * *

Adrien is _not_ visiting Emilie as it turns out.

The repository is empty apart from Emilie herself.

“I’m sorry,” he says to his wife, “I thought I was doing the only thing I _could_ do and keep Adrien’s respect when I gave up, but I think I might have lost our son anyway.”

The fear stays with him as he goes up the lift, and as he steps out of it into the Atelier, and find Nathalie waiting for him he says, “You did say he might not trust us with having the Butterfly and Peacock here, maybe he just wanted to ensure they were out of our grasp.”

Nathalie pales further, “It’s my fault. I asked him how he was but I was so distracted by everything I knew was coming with you that I forgot to ask him if he wanted to stay elsewhere.”

He puts his hand on her shoulder to reassure her, “Don’t blame yourself. If _that’s_ why he’s left then it’s my fault.”

Fantastic work on his part. Not only could what he’d attempted with Nathalie have gone _much_ worse than it actually did, it might also be the reason his son has disappeared on them. Not that it isn’t technically all his fault when you boil it down to the root cause anyway.

“You can leave if you want.” He tells her.

“Leave?” She frowns and doesn’t seem to take his meaning, “Leave the house? Why?”

“I was more thinking leave the _country._ If you went to the airport now you could get on plane before Adrien even realised where you’d gone anywhere. There’s a suitable fake passport for you upstairs-I hope you don’t mind pretending to be Swiss, and I can provide you with the details of one of the offshore bank accounts.”

Despite the fact that his son might have betrayed him and his life might be falling apart he feels oddly vindicated that his fallback plans weren't pure paranoia, and that it hadn’t been presumptuous to include Nathalie in them.

Nathalie is looking at him the same way she had when he'd told her once about an entire folder of designs he'd misplaced, which had turned out to only have been something he'd dreamed of rather than something he’d actually created, “Gabriel. What the hell are you talking about?”

“Adrien isn't here.”

“Yes “ She agrees.

“He's most likely gone to find Ladybug.”

“I don't think we can assume that, but probably yes.”

“He didn't tell us he was going.”

“He didn’t.”

“Or wait for us to agree a story.”

“If he _has_ gone to see Ladybug then yes.”

“So. Most likely that’s because he's going to tell her the while truth. And I've pulled you into all of this. Without asking your permission, because you were useful to me. But there's nothing either of us can do now, so you don't have to stay for this. You've suffered enough, you don’t need public infamy or to go through a trial or whatever comes after. You can flee Nathalie. You can,” he finds himself saying something he’d never have believed he’d say a few minutes ago, “go.”

She turns away from him and starts to walk towards her door, and he thinks _this is it,_ then she stops at her desk.

“Do you know Adrien asked why I never exposed you? Never turned you in?” She sits down at her desk, “I’m staying. I told you I wasn’t leaving you and I’m not. Besides I’m just as guilty as you are.”

“I told you; you don't have to sacrifice yourself for me.”

“And neither do you,” she leans over to turn her computer on, “Besides we _don’t_ know that Adrien’s gone to turn us in. He's your son. He might just have made an unthought through decision to give them to Ladybug straight away, _if_ that’s even where he's gone.”

He's fairly sure he's just been insulted but he does possibly deserve it. He's never seen much of himself in Adrien though. He _has_ however seen a lot of Emilie in him and, “I suppose turning up as the hero of the hour with the Butterfly and the Peacock immediately after receiving them _would_ suit his sense of drama, even without exposing us.”

Certainly he can’t deny that in Adrien’s place he’d see it as a chance to impress the girl he was in love with.

And if Adrien is anything like him even in the slightest maybe he’s gone seeking comfort too. He can only wish him more success. Assuming that everything stays above board that is.

“Exactly,” Nathalie says, “Besides if things turn violent you’ll need me here to protect you.”

Nathalie _does_ have excellent self-defence skills which _usually_ he'd have no issues watching but there's a glint in her eye he usually only sees when those eyes are pink and, “Please don't stab Ladybug. Adrien’s in love with her.”

“At least you’ve progressed to worry _for_ Adrien, instead of _about_ him. “ Nathalie says metaphorically stabbing _him_ instead, “Go get properly dressed. I’m going to ring around the class list, and see if Adrien’s turned up anywhere. It's possible he decided to see a friend after all and thought it was easier to sneak out as his alter-ego than ask.”

“But,” he’s about to argue that they’d _told_ Adrien he could go out, so if that was what he wanted he could have just _done it_ but Nathalie just looks at him, and she looks as exhausted as he feels so he leaves it.

* * *

His phone rings while he's still trying to do up his waistcoat, and he has to run to his dresser to get it. It’s an unknown number and usually he wouldn’t answer those but then there’s _nothing_ usual about any of today.

So it picks it up hoping that is _is_ Adrien after all. “Hello?”

“Father.”

He relaxes at the sound of his son’s voice. “Adrien?”

“Hi.” His son says, “Sorry for the weird number, I sort of can’t detransform right now.”

He heads towards the door with the intention of letting Nathalie know that Adrien’s been found. Or is in contact at least. “Adrien where are you?”

Instead of answering _that_ Adrien says, “I may have really messed up.”

“What’s happened? Are you safe?” His hand freezes on the doorknob as he’s suddenly reminded he's not the only villain in this world, “No one’s gone after you for those Miraculous jewels have they?”

“I'm fine! And I ok, I don't exactly have the Miraculous, but I kind of have the Miraculous?”

A headache starts to build in his temple. “How can you _kind of_ have the Miraculous?”

“Ok, so technically I don't have them on me but they are really really close, and I trust the person they're with and when I’m done talking to you I'll go back in for them?”

“Go back in? Again Adrien where on earth are you?

“I can’t tell you that.”

There’s an easy way to explain _that_ at least. “You’re at Ladybug’s.”

“Um, I don't even know who Ladybug _is.”_

“Than where,” his headache is getting worse _rapidly_ , “Are you even in still Paris?”

There’s a pause then, “... Yes.”

“And you’re on the street or something and you’ve left the Butterfly and Peacock inside?”

“I _have_ left those inside.” Adrien agrees.

He sighs, at the answer that _shouldn’t_ be obvious but since his son is Chat Noir is. “You’re on a roof somewhere aren't you?”

“Yes.”

“But you are transformed at least?”

“Yes”

That’s something at least, but it’s worrying in its own way because _that_ suggests Adrien’s climbed window and that bears its own worrying implications. “Please tell me it's not one of your little harem whose bedroom you’ve managed to fall out of?”

“I didn’t fall out. I’m just hiding.” Then Adrien seems to realise what he’s said and adds, “And stop making it weird by calling them that! She’s my friend.”

“Oh my god.”

Maybe he _won’t_ go into the Atelier and put the phone on speaker after all. He’s not sure he wants to make Nathalie a witness to this.

Somehow Adrien dares to sound confused, “Father?”

“Adrien you’re 14. You shouldn’t be climbing out of girl’s bedrooms in the middle of the night to hide from their parents.”

He _also_ shouldn’t be using his superpowers to go out and visit his, well hopefully girlfriend as otherwise this is even worse, but Gabriel can acknowledge that _he_ of all people can’t really opine on not using a Miraculous for personal purposes.

On the upside if anyone _does_ manage to photograph Adrien right now it’s only Chat Noir they’ll be catching not Adrien Agreste. He supposes he should be thankful for small mercies.

“How did you _know_ I was hiding from her parents?”

Absently he wonders how long it would take to replace all of Adrien’s bedroom windows with ones that don’t open. His agreement with Adrien before they’d managed to swap back _had_ included a clause to give Adrien more reason to visit his friends, and his isn’t planning to break that agreement any more than he would any contract he signs professionally, but that doesn’t mean he’s going to give Adrien carte blanche for things like _this._

“Why else would you be hiding on the roof with the Miraculous left in her room,” he really hopes he’s wrong but, “Please tell me that you didn’t bring those two Miraculous to her to show off.”

“Why would I do that? She was never meant to see them.”

“So why are you there?” And why is he _calling_ him. If he needed picking up he could understand but that doesn’t really sound like the case.

“Uh, so I was just going out to clear my head and m” Adrien stutters, “my friend saw me, and I couldn’t _not_ acknowledge her because that would be rude, so I went over to say hi.”

For a moment he considers telling Adrien that despite the fact they’re always brought him up to be polite, and always told him to do so, on occasion it can in fact be necessary not to be. Which is something he’d have thought he’d have learnt by example but apparently not. But the idea of Adrien taking that idea and running with it and embarrassing all of them _quite_ puts him off.

So he just says. “Right.” Then on realising, “Wait she waved at _Chat Noir?_ Do you make a _habit_ of visiting random girls at Chat Noir?”

He would ask if Adrien had _another_ set of little fans, but he’s unfortunately aware thanks to some websites he’d already really wished he hadn’t found when researching the heroes, and now he knows Chat Noir’s _Adrien_ he wishes he hadn’t found even more, that Chat Noir also has a rather rabid teenage fanbase.

He hadn’t thought Adrien would be doing _night-time meet and greets_ with any of them though. He’s _14._ He’s sure this wouldn’t have been the case when Emilie was here to sort things out. He’s going to have to ask Nathalie if she or any of the other staff have seen anything of Adrien.

“I’m re-instating your dating ban.”

“Did you ever lift it?”

“I don’t care. It’s back in force. Are we going to have to pay this girl’s parents off or something?”

“ _What do you think I’ve been doing?”_ Adrien shrieks, “Stop making everything weird! We were just _talking,_ I told her about mum actually. Not the true circumstances but you know, the gist of things.”

He suddenly feels very heavy. What exactly the _gist_ of things is he’s not quite sure, and though it makes him even more tired to think about it he realises that _that_ is one of those things he and Adrien was going to have to discuss.

He can’t face it now though, “So how exactly did this end up with the Butterfly and the Peacock in her bedroom, and you on the roof?”

“So I, um actually we can talk about that later, but she went downstairs to get something and see, she’s a very trustworthy person who would never misuse a Miraculous so I thought maybe I could hide them with her for now, until we worked out to what to say to Ladybug.”

“Much as I admire putting your natural charm to use to impress one of your fans into doing what you need, is that safe?”

“That is _not_ what I was doing, but I’d decided against it anyway because I didn’t want to risk her being harmed by the Peacock.”

“Understandable.” That’s fair, although it doesn’t really mesh with Adrien’s conviction that she wouldn’t use a Miraculous she found.

“But she caught me with it! And I was about to explain but just as I did that her father came up to see why she was still awake,”

“And that’s how you ended up hiding on her roof.”

“No, that time she shoved me in her wardrobe. She’s surprisingly strong actually.”

“Then why are you on the roof _now_?”

“So they had a kind of _long_ conversation, but it was really sweet, we should have long conversations, but it mostly came down to her not staying up all night sewing when there’s school tomorrow which to be fair he _might_ have a point about.”

Gabriel isn’t sure _any_ of this is relevant _at all_ about part of him wants to ask if the girl’s parents would be interested in a swap where _they_ have the sentimental conversation with Adrien, and he sews in silence with this girl, because he _can_ relate to her situation, but, “and the point?”

“So they finished and I _was_ going to explain about the Miraculous, but then one of her parents called _again_ because apparently Nathalie rang asking if I was there, and they wanted to know if M,”

Adrien catches himself just in time but Gabriel has suspicions of the girl’s identity and _really_ if Adrien didn’t know he she liked him, or that he might reciprocate then what the hell is he doing visiting her at night as Chat Noir?

“My friend,” his son says awkwardly, “knew anything about where Adrien was, and this time I managed to get out to the balcony and onto the roof, and I thought I’d better phone you before the two of you worry too much.”

“Yes,” he realises, “I’d best tell Nathalie you’ve been found.”

“How many people has she _rang?”_

“I don’t know. I believe she’s working her way through your class list.”

“This is another thing I’m going to have to make up a story for isn’t it?”

“It seems like it.” Getting back to the important things, “How on earth did you end up on the roof _without_ the two brooches anyway?”

“I dropped them when she pushed me in the wardrobe.”

“Of course you did.”

“What do I _do_?”

“Do you trust this girl?”

“Yes, but I can’t just go in and say ‘Oh these are Hawk Moth and Mayura’s I defeated them single-handedly’ can I?”

Technically he could but, “Just tell her they’re magic brooches you need her to hide for a while, and that Paris is relying on her or whatever you two heroes usually say, and then for the love of god Adrien _come home.“_

“OK,” Adrien says, “I’m going to do it. Wish me luck.”


	18. Chapter 18

“Um, hi,” he says to Marinette, as he comes back in the door to her balcony and then comes to a stop on seeing her, because for some reason she’s holding a cushion up to her face, “Are you ok?”

She drops it like he’s startled her, “I’m fine.”

He’s not sure she _is_ fine from how she looks kind of flushed, and her hair looks messed up as if she’s been pulling at it, but it doesn’t feel right to say so, so instead he says, “You’re kind of whispering?”

“You should be too!” She hisses and glances at her trapdoor, “Do you want my parents here _again?”_

“Good point,” he agrees and lowers his voice, “So, I er, was going to say sorry for not coming back sooner but your friend’s parents looking for him made me realise that I should really ring mine. So.”

“Yeah, I worked that out.” She says sounding more conefident, and holds out the Butterfly and Peacock brooches, “So, which Miraculous are these then? Do you hand them out sometimes instead of Ladybug.”

“Yeah,” he’d not thought about the fact that even if she’s not Ladybug Marinette does know what a Miraculous is, but he seizes on the opportunity, “I do sometimes, but for reasons I can’t really go into I need to store these two somewhere safe. And I thought who’s the most trustworthy person I know, I _know:_ Marinette.”

He smiles at her wide-eyed stare. If she _is_ Ladybug then she knows he’s lying, but it’s _her_ choice not to admit that so even though he does feel bad about it he’s not going to break this possible stalemate. Especially since it’s still possible that she’s _not_ Ladybug.

She’s still staring at him like she’s never seen him before “I’m, uh, flattered but which Miraculous are both of these?”

“Um,” his smile feels frozen on his face, he should have thought about the fact that she knows about the Miraculous and thought up an answer, “The purplish one is er,” it doesn’t really look that much like a butterfly but it also doesn’t look much like anything else, “The starfish Miraculous?”

“It only has four points.”

“One of them broke off,” he cringes even as he says it, “and the other one is er, the Pheasant Miraculous.”

“It kind of looks like Mayura’s fan.”

“What a weird coincidence.”

Her face drops to something he’s only ever seen on her face looking at Lila, which kind of hurts, before she says, “Adrien. I heard you on the roof.”

“You _what?”_ He cannot believe this has happened to him _again_ , _“_ I can’t believe you eavesdropped on me.”

_Do all women and girls eavesdrop or is it just Nathalie and Marinette?_

“You disappeared on me! I had to make sure if you were still out there, or if you’d just ran off after everything leaving these here, but once I heard it kind of sounded like you were talking about me I did give your privacy. But then when I realised these were definitely what I thought they were, I had to check on you again. It’s not like I could do _nothing_ if Chat Noir was working with Hawk Moth and Mayura. “

“I’m _not._ ”

“Are you even the real Chat Noir? Urgh,” she pulls at her hair again, “I don’t even know what I want the answer to that to be.”

 _He’s_ not sure he wants to know that either, but “I _am_. I swear I am. I know this all looks bad but I have a _really_ good explanation.”

“Adrien Agreste is Chat Noir.”

“Yes.”

“Adrien Agreste _has always_ been Chat Noir.”

_“Yes.”_

Marinette makes a sound that could be the start of a scream or a squeal or _something_ then stops with her hands tightly clenched.

“Are you, okay?” he asks again.

“I really want to scream right now, but if I do my parents will hear.”

“OK?” he says again because he has no idea _how_ to respond to that.

“Wait.” Her eyes narrow, “You kissed me!”

“I did.”

“And you’ve never shown any sign of wanting to do that Adrien, and I have been _watching_ very carefully for that, so clearly you _haven’t_ been Chat Noir the whole time and you were just impersonating what you think _he_ would do but the jokes on you because he loves Ladybug! He’d be loyal to her. Oh my god _Adrien Agreste_ is working with Hawk Moth.”

He’d thought the whole issue of explaining how he had the two Miraculous brooches might go badly. He _hadn’t_ thought it would go badly in this particular way. He super does not have a plan for this.

“I’m not working with Hawk Moth, and just because I love Ladybug doesn’t mean I don’t like you too! It’s confusing ok?”

“No, no it’s not ok when that doesn’t seem anything like either Chat Noir _or_ Adrien would do, and I’m _still_ not convinced that you’re both of them, and not just Adrien impersonating Chat Noir.”

“Look, I kissed you because I _wanted_ to, you were,” he swallows, “you were really nice about my mum, and I’ve kind of liked you for a while, and I was kind of overwhelmed so I wasn’t really thinking.”

“You’ve liked me for a while?”

“I only recently worked it out, but yeah. You can ask Nino about it if you want. We’ve been talking about it. Actually he knows I like another girl as well but he thinks its Kagami because I couldn’t really say it was Ladybug could I? He’d think it was just a celebrity crush.”

“ _Nino_ knows you like me?”

“Don’t be mad at him, I only worked it out while I was off school sick. Except,”

Her eyes are fill of understanding, “You weren’t sick were you?”

“No. Um, thanks for trying to visit by the way. That was really nice of you. But, um, so that whole transformation I had as Chat Noir? Turns out that wasn’t just as Chat Noir.”

“But you were at school the day of the akuma attack. You were _normal._ ” She makes a face, “Actually no, you were _weird,_ but you still looked like you.”

“So, funny story but that actually wasn’t me. I um, sort of woke up in someone else’s body and they woke up in mine?”

His hands feel frozen where he’d gestured, “yeah it’s crazy isn’t it”, as Marinette just _looks_ at him clearly incredulous.

“What.”

“Honestly that was kind of my first response too.”

_“How?”_

“Honestly that was kind of Plagg’s, uh, my Kwami’s fault.”

“I know who Plagg is,” she says without seeming to realise she’s only encouraging him in thinking she’s Ladybug.

He really _hopes_ she’s Ladybug because he _cannot_ tell this story twice. It’s already excruciating and he’s barely got anywhere.

“Wait.” She suddenly adds, “Are you telling me _you_ switched with _Hawk Moth?_ ”

“How did you work that out?”

She blinks, “I was just going to say that was a stupid idea because you can’t have because clearly you didn’t end up with each other Miraculous given that akuma attack, but you _did?_ ”

“Yeah,” he admits awkwardly.

“That was _Hawk Moth_ that day at school? _Hawk Moth_ had a go at Lila on your behalf? _Hawk Moth_ complimented my designs? Oh my god, am I supposed to be thankful to _Hawk Moth?_ ”

“If it makes you feel better I think he might have deliberately annoyed her so he could akumatise her? Though honestly if she stops being clingy now I’m definitely not going to complain.”

“Yeah,” she sniffs, “That almost makes that akuma attack worth it.”

“Um.”

“Please forget I said that.”

“Yeah, ok.”

She still looks shell-shocked, “I tried to ask Hawk Moth back to my house.”

“Yeah I heard about that.”

“Wait, so are you actually banned from dating or was that an excuse because apparently there are some lines even Hawk Moth won’t cross.”

“I mean it was the former, but my father wasn’t very happy to hear that I was at a female friend’s tonight, so I actually might be now.”

“That’s” She stops, “OK that’s not the important thing right now but, _your father knows about all of this_?”

“It kind of wasn’t possible to keep it from him,” he says and hopes his awkwardness passes for sheepishness for letting his father know Chat Noir’s identity rather than guilt for omitting the very pertinent reason of exactly _why_ that was impossible.

Marinette holds up her hand as if she’s going to make a point then drops it, and says, “Yeah I guess that’s fair enough, but you’re telling me that Weirdo-Adult-Chat-Noir was Hawk Moth and not what you’re going to look like?”

“Yeah.”

“Thank goodness,” she says then she blushes and says, “Please forget I said that.”

“Actually I’m very invested in knowing that you’re interested in what I’m going to look like when I’m older.”

“You, what, I” She shuts her mouth, and then her eyes, and about ten seconds later opens them again, “Much as I cannot believe I’m saying this, and I cannot believe that _Adrien Agreste_ kissed me and I have to ignore that because of flipping Hawk Moth, that’s not the important thing right now. Right. So. Hawk Moth.”

“Yes?”

“OK so this is also not important but Hawk Moth has a ponytail? Or long enough hair for a ponytail.”

“Yes.” He is never telling this part of the conversation to his father, “Hawk Moth has a ponytail.”

“OK.” She says, “OK. So explain how this ended up fixed and with you having both his Miraculous _and_ Mayura’s.”

He’s kept Chat Noir secret for all this time, and by nature and nurture _both_ he should be an excellent liar but the weight of everything relying on this makes it difficult. He needs the perfect lie. One that she won’t judge him for, and that she’ll believe and that will keep his family safe.

“OK, so don’t judge me please,” he starts.

“Did you _help_ Hawk Moth with whatever he wanted and _that’s_ why he’s given you those?”

“What?” He’s almost offended given he’d fulfilled his responsibility over his mother’s life; even if this must all seem really dodgy to Marinette, “I would _never_ do that.”

“So what _did_ you do?”

“Hawk Moth and I,” he tries again, “We both had to do something for each other to reverse the magic that had done this to us, _something big._ So he gave me his Miraculous.”

“And Mayura just followed suit?”

“Actually she gave me hers first. In retrospect I think she might have been trying to force his hand.”

Not that that would be a bad thing, and he doesn’t think Nathalie was _lying_ about not wanting to fight him, but she works with his father all day and was his partner-in-crime as Hawk Moth, she must understand him better than Adrien does so he can’t help but think that wanting to give his father another push to give up his Miraculous was probably another impetus for her to give up hers.

“Huh. Yeah I guess having her partner be _you_ mustn’t have been fun for her either. I mean, much as a looks upgrade as it might have been, you’re not an adult.”

“Yeah,” he’s not touching that, or the implications of that with a barge pole.

“But if he gave you _his_ Miraculous and you _didn’t_ give him yours then what on earth did you do for him?”

He commits to it. “I promised to keep their identities secret and bring these to Ladybug.”

“Oh.”

“I know I shouldn’t have done it, and I know it’s not really my right to make that decision,”

“No, that’s not what I meant. I mean _that_ was _equal_ to him giving up being Hawk Moth? Not that I’m not relieved but,”

“He’s got a lot to lose if it came out.”

“What? Like his family or something? Aren’t he and Mayura together though? Or his job? That seems like it should be the least of his concerns.”

“I can’t really tell you because I can’t say anything that might give you a clue. So I can’t say why he wanted the Ladybug and the Black Cat Miraculous either. But um,” he tries to work out what he can say safely, “I can tell you they’re not going to be any sort of threat to us. He knows it’s a lost cause.”

She chews at her lower lip, “I believe you I think. Even though this all sounds really crazy. And, I think I get it-why you’d do that. Even if I wish you’d explained to Ladybug what was going on earlier.”

For once he’s actually kind of glad that Ladybug is in the dark. All of this is bad enough as it is. He doesn’t want to be Hawk Moth’s son to her.

He doesn’t admit that though. “Maybe. I can’t go back on it now though. I keep my promises. And also, I think the curse might reverse if I did.”

“OK don’t tell me,” Marinette says in a rush, “ _Or_ Ladybug, I’m sure she’d understand. Because the important thing is that Paris is safe now, and that there’s not going to be any more akuma attacks. And you’ve basically got rid of Hawk Moth as a threat without collateral damage. Not that Miraculous Ladybug doesn’t fix up the physical damage but,”

Yeah Adrien thinks Ladybug _would_ understand if Marinette does, “Yeah. Yeah I guess that’s how I justified it to myself even if it was kind of selfish, but I understand if Ladybug can’t trust me anymore, and if she wants my Miraculous back to give to a new Chat Noir. A Chat Noir who Hawk Moth and Mayura don’t know the identities of. Or just for safekeeping as I guess she doesn’t need a Chat Noir without Hawk Moth and Mayura.”

He pulls the ring off, and holds it out to Marinette, it feels a fitting atonement for lying to her about all of this and for protecting the supervillains they’ve been fighting the whole time.

“Adrien,” she almost sounds like _she’s_ on the verge of tears, “I don’t think Ladybug would want that, but shouldn’t you be telling that to _her_?”

After everything else it seems like very little to say, “I think I am.”

She takes a step back, “No. No you’re not. I’m not Ladybug.”

“Marinette never saw Hawk Moth-Chat Noir with a ponytail.”

“That doesn’t mean anything. Ladybug could have told me.”

“Then if you’re close enough friends for that you’re close enough to give her these.”

“You’re giving me _all three of them,_ and you don’t even know I’m Ladybug. Chat Noir you can’t just do that. That’s irresponsible.”

“I know I trust Marinette Dupain-Cheng whether she’s Ladybug or not, and they’re safer with you than with me. We can talk after school if you want to go through it more. Though honestly I feel like I might sleep through the entire morning at this point.”

“How are you going to get home without your Miraculous?”

“I’m message my father or Nathalie to get picked up, they know I’m out anyway” He looks at her door, “How easy it is to sneak out past your parents?”

“Well contact your father first, you can’t just stand outside in the cold.”

“I was thinking I’d walk a bit away from here. I don’t exactly want him knowing where exactly I am.”

“That’s ridiculous. You can’t go out at this time of night as you.”

“Have you got a better idea?”

“Urgh,” she exhales through her nostrils, “ _Look,_ I’ll contact Ladybug and you can go out to my balcony and she can carry you home safely if you insist on this ridiculousness.”

Adrien doesn’t point out that means _Marinette_ is going to have to sneak downstairs. The argument really doesn’t seem worth it.

“Alright then,” he says, and steps towards the balcony only to be stopped by Marinette’s hand.

“Adrien,” she says, “What you said about your mum, did your father _really_ decide this was the time to do that while you were swapped? Or was it a sudden thing? I thought she was missing.”

“Yeah, so did I.”

She looks at him confused.

“She _has_ been in a coma all this time. My father’s just been in total denial about it and had her in some secretive private hospital so he could pretend she was going to come back one day.”

“And he told you that _now?_ Or did Hawk Moth work it out something or _what?_ ”

“After he discovered I was Chat Noir a lot of secrets kind of came out in our house.”

“That’s messed up.”

“Yeah.”

“Are you sure you _want_ to go home?”

“I am. I know that probably doesn’t make sense to you but I do.” And he means it in that moment despite everything.”

“OK, then,” she says and let’s go of him.

“Wait,” he has suddenly remembering, “The Peacock Miraculous is broken. You mustn’t put it on or it’ll make you ill.”

“What? Did Hawk Moth break it? _How?_ ”

“Um, no he didn’t, and I don’t know how.”

“But _Mayura_ used it. Though,” she looks both thoughtful and disgusted, “Is that why she _didn’t_ at first? That never made sense to me before.”

“Yeah, I think so.” He _hopes_ so.

“Maybe that’s part of why he gave up, if it was getting more dangerous. Though I don’t know how much he could care about her if he let her do it in the first place.”

“It’s a mystery to me too,” It really is, he can’t imagine letting any of his friends do that, “but I um, really should be getting home now.”

“Yeah, of course, sorry. You go out. I’ll call Ladybug.”


	19. Chapter 19

The alarms goes. 

No.

He is not ready to face this day in any way shape or form.

The idea of getting up and speaking to _anyone,_ even Nathalie, feels impossible right now.

Part of him can’t believe yesterday happened but there’s no Miraculous at his throat. No hum of other people’s emotions in his blood.

He feels empty. The empathy his Miraculous had granted _had_ left him the moment he’d renounced that brooch but there had been so much _else_ going on yesterday, with Adrien, with _Nathalie,_ that though he’d mourned the loss of the skills it gave him he’d been in enough emotional turmoil that he hadn’t felt the loss of other people’s emotions.

It’s odd. There’s only _his_ emotions bubbling under his chest now and he feels hollow but also lighter.

That doesn’t mean he’s ready to face with the future without Emilie, with everything he’s agreed to try to do and be for Adrien, and with whatever relationship, working or otherwise, he and Nathalie can fumble their way to in the future.

There’s a knock at his door, “Mr Agreste?”

Talking of Nathalie, “Come in.”

There’s a silence from behind the door then, “Are you dressed?”

“I’m decent,” he prevaricates, unwilling to go into how the whole situation of how he’s feeling.

She lets herself in. Unlike him _she_ looks exactly as she always does, as if this is just a normal day and all the momentous events of yesterday never happened. Just as she has every day since this whole thing started.

It makes him force himself to sit up. Both because her steady dependability reminds him that he’s not alone in this, and because he finds himself not wanting to disappoint her any further.

“You’ve a meeting in 45 minutes.”

“A virtual one?”

She raises an eyebrow. “As always sir.”

“Nathalie,” he sighs, “Remind me, did Ladybug drop Adrien home yesterday after he accidentally gave her both his and our Miraculous? After I gave mine up?”

“Yes, although I don’t know that I’d call it accidental.”

“You didn’t have the phone call with him I did.”

”No I just had,” she cuts herself off, “Well it doesn’t matter. They’re out of our reach now, and from that embarrassed wave Ladybug gave us I’m happy to believe Adrien’s assurances she doesn’t know _we_ were who she’d been fighting this whole time.”

“For now anyway.”

Nathalie looks at him in silent question.

“I have an unfortunate feeling we might end up with her being something of a regular visitor.” He tells her.

Whatever Adrien might claim it seems a little _neat_ that he was visiting one girl when he’d rang home, and then Ladybug had conveniently been around to take the Miraculous and bring him home. Especially since when they’d hung up he hadn’t planned to talk to Ladybug that night.

And while he _can’t_ say the girl in question does anything more than superficially resemble Ladybug with how the magic makes it impossible to recognise her face; she certainly does at least superficially resemble her. Same build. Same colouring.

“Ah.” Nathalie says. “I see. Should I be expecting _Ladybug_ or?”

“We’ll see.” He’s hoping for the latter. It might be easier. Much as his anger at _Adrien_ for stopping them saving Emilie is pretty much embers at this stage, quenched by the queasy realisation of everything he’s done to his son, he’s not ready to forgive Ladybug herself for thwarting him, and sucking Adrien into her morality yet. “Much as I’d like to forestall the issue from happening I’d prefer to have to put up with her here than with Adrien attempting to see if he could climb out that window detransformed.”

“Please don’t suggest that to him. He’s already given me enough frights over the years with that climbing wall of his.”

“Yes, Emilie told me he went through a stage of spending more time up there than on the ground.” He’s quite proud of the climbing wall really. It’s one of his few successful presents to Adrien. Even if technically it had been Emilie’s idea, and Nathalie had organised the installation, he’d paid for it and that has to count for something.

“Is Adrien ready for school?”

“Adrien has a dental appointment this morning.” She says, “I’ve already told his school.”

“Is the school likely to check that?”

“Unlikely. But I don’t think it’s going to be a problem bribing his dentist if need be.”

“And what have I got this morning then?”

“A meeting. I just told you sir.” She sits up on the edge of the bed, “How _are_ you doing? I thought you’d prefer the distraction of work but if I thought wrong I can come up with an excuse, though we are already behind now.”

“No,” he says, “You were right. I should get up or I might never do so. And Nathalie, I don’t want to pressure you again, but I think that after all we’ve been through you can stop calling me sir. Unless that makes you uncomfortable.”

“I do still work for you,” She points out, “But I’ll take that under consideration. But Gabriel?”

“Yes?”

“You really do need to get up now if you’re going to make that meeting.”

* * *

He stares at the wardrobe. In the circumstances his usual outfit looks wrong. Of course he _has_ clothes for mourning Emilie, and he’s used them to put on a performance of it, the portrait is evidence enough.

But Emilie _hadn’t_ been gone then. He was going to bring her back. And know he’s _not._

Red doesn’t feel wrong for how exposed his own emotions feel right now without other people’s to snuffle them but the rest _does._ It feels too cheerful. But the rest of the world doesn’t know what’s happened yet. He can hardly go out in full mourning.

He settles on a grey sports jacket as a compromise, and a darker waistcoat in a contrasting tweed.

* * *

Nathalie doesn’t remark on the outfit change.

* * *

It’s strange how _normal_ the rest of the day goes. It shouldn’t be. He _should_ feel Emilie’s painted disappointment behind him. Instead it feels like the most normal day he’s had in months.

* * *

Nathalie goes to check on Adrien to see if he’s ready to go to school yet.

She’s gone a long time.

When she comes back she says, “I think you need to talk to Adrien.”

A spike of stress goes through him, “What? Has something happened?”

“Not something to do with the Miraculous,” she says and he immediately relaxes, “No it’s something more mundane I think.”

“You _think?_ ”

“I told him I thought this was a conversation it was better for him to have with _you._ He seemed opposed to that idea. Apparently you’ve banned him from dating or something?”

Oh no. _No._ no. He is not ready for this. “What if I gave you a bonus to have this conversation with him? Aren’t I busy today?”

“He’s your son Gabriel.” She says unimpressed, “Actually that rather is the crux of the problem as far as I can tell.”

He groans, “And this _has_ to be now?”

“He does _want_ to go to school sometime today.”

* * *

“Nathalie said you wanted to talk to me.”

Adrien startles at his voice, and looks up him from his in what looks like sheer panic, “I told her not to tell you!”

“Apparently she disagreed. What happened?”

His son doesn’t meet his eyes, “Are you going to let me out of this house if you disapprove?”

He leans against the wall to reduce some of the distance between them. “All evidence seems to suggest you desperately need the social interaction so unfortunately it does seem like I’m going to have to let you go to school and your other commitments. So what’s the issue?”

“You probably couldn’t help anyway. I doubt it’s the sort of thing you’ve any experience of.”

“You don’t know that.”

“I did something really stupid last night.”

“You seemed to do quite well with the story you told Ladybug I thought.” The praise sits awkwardly on his tongue and he can’t remember when the last time he praised Adrien was. Emilie had always had such a constant stream of compliments for her darling boy he’d never thought to.

“The Ladybug part isn’t really the problem,” it’s a good thing that Adrien’s wearing jeans because he’d crease another material with how his fingers are digging into his legs. “It’s,”

“Your friend,” Gabriel can play this game if that’s what Adrien wants to do, “The one that shoved you in the wardrobe, and who you’re going to see at school.”

“How did you,” Adrien starts.

He interrupts, “You said Nathalie had rang her parents looking for you.”

“Oh right,” Adrien says, “I’d forgotten that.”

“It seems like you had a stressful night.”

“Yeah. Especially because, um, I did something really stupid, and I kissed her.”

The temptation to be a little cruel is impossible to resist. “Oh, you’ve chosen between her and Ladybug then? That was fast.”

“Uh, yeah no I’m certain about _that._ That’s not the issue. And I think after my friend forced me to call Ladybug to collect the Miraculous she knows that too. “

“What _is_ the issue then? If you like her and she likes you then I don’t see the problem?” In fact possibly from a branding perspective he thinks it will do Adrien’s reputation less damage to be in a settled relationship than the dangers inherent in his current mess, “Apart from the distraction it’ll be for both of you from your schoolwork and other things but I assume the mooning other each over would be a distraction too.”

Back in the days when he still hadn’t been sure that Emilie’s flirting had been serious he’d once driven a needle into his own thumb with some force distracted by her. And that’s not mentioning the amount of time he’d spent drawing her without even the excuse of coming up with his own designs to dress her in.

“There’s a _lot_ of issues. I just lied to her about everything for a start.”

“Adrien,”

“Yeah, yeah I know I can’t tell her. I’m not going to it’s just, aren’t relationships _supposed_ to be built on trust?”

That’s a difficult question to answer when he thinks there was _too_ much trust in his marriage. He’d trusted that Emilie _needed_ the Miraculous and she wouldn’t go too far. She’d trusted that he’d always save her. Time made fools of both of them.

None of that is relevant to Adrien’s situation and he forces himself to focus, “But she knows you haven’t told her everything doesn’t she? That puts the ball firmly in her court, if she _wants_ to date you knowing you have secrets you can’t tell her then you’re not obliged to tell you them.”

“That doesn’t really feel right,” Adrien says.

He shrugs. Adrien asked for _his_ advice so he gave it. He can’t help it if it’s not what his son wants to hear.

“Anyway, I don’t know that she _is_ interested any more. I think I disappointed her.”

That throws him, “In what way?”

Marinette’s emotions had felt akin to _Nathalie’s_ to him. That doesn’t exactly suggest something that disappears because of a few secrets or ill-advised actions.

“Maybe not with the whole keeping Hawk Moth’s identity a secret thing, I think she was shocked but she’ll get over that, but between the fact I kissed her as Chat Noir before she knew I was Adrien, and that I was literally almost crying over mum like a second before I don’t really think it came off brilliantly.”

“I see.” In fact he can see _exactly_ Nathalie’s point about the issue being Adrien being his son. Feeling like something of a hypocrite he says, “Are you sure you did it for the right reasons?”

“Obviously I didn’t!” Adrien raises his voice slightly, but for once he’ll let it pass, “I was confused, and grieving, and she was being really nice. I wouldn’t have done it like _that_ otherwise. I wanted to, you know, work out what I wanted to do and then invite her out on a weekend day, and maybe get ice cream in the park and _then_ maybe kiss her. But I _do_ like her _._ That’s not a lie. I liked her before you told me about my mother.”

“Yes it is difficult, but maybe you _should_ leave it for a while. If nothing else it might make it easier for _her_ to believe that. You can’t push these things Adrien, you’ll only embarrass yourself.”

“Why did you say it _is_ difficult _?_ ”

“I’m sorry?”

“You sounded like you knew what you were talking about.”

“I do have romantic experience Adrien.” Mainly with Emilie but that’s _not_ the point.

Adrien’s jaw dropped, “Did you kiss Nathalie last night?”

“ _What?_ Adrien no.”

His son raises an eyebrow, “So it was just me making a fool of myself last night?”

“Look,” he sighs, trying to work out how on earth this conversation has gone so badly wrong, “I’m only telling you this so you don’t say anything to her to make her uncomfortable, but Nathalie and I did talk last night, and clear up a lot of matters.”

Adrien grins, _“And?_ ”

“And nothing.”

That makes his face fall. “Nothing?”

“We’re leaving things as they are at the moment, and once everything is a bit more sorted then we’ll see if we want to change that. I believe it’s called making a sensible decision. I’ve been rather unfamiliar with that concept for a while.”

His attempt at a joke doesn’t make Adrien smile. Apparently he can only amuse people when he doesn’t want to.

“Is that fair to Nathalie?”

“It’s what Nathalie wants. And you should probably follow what your friend wants to.”

“Yeah, but, I feel like the last few days have shown that what Nathalie wants isn’t always what’s good for her.”

“That’s true. And I’m working to change that but in this particular case she is right.” Every cell in his body screams out against the idea of baring himself to his son like this but, “Our situations are very different Adrien. Only you can tell if you’re pushing for this faster than you would have otherwise but in my case I only admitted I wasn’t going to get your mother back yesterday. I’m _not_ ready.”

“I guess.” Adrien says, “I still don’t know what I’m meant to do when I see my friend at school though.”

“I can’t tell you what to do.”

“What would _you_ do in my position?”

“Probably change schools so I never had to see her again, and pretend the whole thing didn’t happen.”

“ _Really?”_

“That or come up with a complicated plan to win her over. It could go either way but I wouldn’t recommend you try the latter.”

“I’m not trying the former either. Look,” Adrien says, “I’m going to apologise again, and tell her that I do like her, but it’s up to her. That’s all I can do right?”

“That’s all you can do.” Gabriel confirms.

That Adrien is _not_ to visit her in the middle of the night seems like a conversation they can put off until he actually convinces this girl to date him.


	20. Chapter 20

It's only when he crosses the threshold of his classroom door that Adrien is hit by how easily he might never have been able to come here and see his friends again.

So many things could have gone wrong in so many ways. If his father had refused to let his mother go, well, he's struggling to see how _that_ could have ended in a reconciliation and a return to their own bodies.

Nathalie had scheduled his return in the early break between classes so he's able to go right over to his friends, “You would not believe how glad I am to see you guys.”

“Uh, yeah, dude us too” Nino says, “Finally feeling better then?”

“ _Yes,”_ he says fervently, “Much.”

Then he’s so overcome with relief that he hugs his best friend.

Nino makes a surprised noise, but doesn’t try to pull away, “Did something happen?”

“Uh. Yeah. But I’m not ready to talk about it yet “

“I won’t push you. But seriously, do I have something else to hate your dad for?”

Technically yes, but the issue hadn't been his time off school, it was everything before that. “Actually I think we might finally be sorting things out.”

“Seriously dude?”

“Yeah, I mean we talked about stuff.”

“Right, stuff.” He can feel Nino’s glance towards Marinette, “So are you allowed to date like a normal teenager now?”

Marinette’s presence, right _there,_ makes him squirm. He doesn't want to be pushy. But he’s doesn't want to ruin his chances by making it seem impossible too. He doesn’t _want_ it to be impossible.

“As much as I can with my life, yeah.”

Alya looks amused, “Are you trying to steal my boyfriend Agreste?”

“Hey,” Nino says, “let me and Adrien have our bro hug. You know I’d never betray you babe.”

“Can’t blame me for being worried when my competition's a famous model.”

“Do you want a hug too Alya?”

She laughs, “Hey why not? Let him go,” she gives her boyfriend a joking shove, and when he lets go of him, throws her own arms around Adrien.

Alya hugs with more force than Nino does, but she also lets go of him pretty quickly too.

“Hey?” She says, “Marinette? Do you want an Adrien hug too?”

He can feel his cheeks going red. This is unacceptable. He’s Chat Noir. He’s a model. He _should_ be able to hide this better.

At least Marinette doesn’t look any more collected than he does, although her blushing is actually kind of cute, which he’s not sure is the case for his. He’s never been asked to _blush_ in a photoshoot.

“I, um,” she stutters, “Me,”

“She doesn’t have to!” He interrupts.

Alya frowns, “Do you have some problem with hugging Marinette?”

“No!” That was definitely too loud, and he tries to play it off with a laugh, “Of course I’d love to hug Marinette, but I don’t want to make her uncomfortable.”

Marinette is staring wide-eyed at him, and Nino is giving him a _look,_ and what’s he done wrong now?

Oh. He should have said _like_ there rather than love. That was probably a bit much. Especially with what he’d done the last time he’d hugged her.

“Not that I’d do anything weird to make it uncomfortable,” he tries to reassure her, “But you shouldn’t feel pressured or anything.”

Marinette doesn’t say anything until Alya elbows her, and then finally she nods, “Hugging is ok, we can hug.”

Neither of them move though until he forces himself to do, and he’s convinced his face is _even_ redder now.

But it’s nice.

Apart from the fact that her face is really _really_ close to him, and now he happens to know _exactly_ how easy it would be to just bend his head down to meet her lips with his, and he also knows exactly what it would feel like to do so.

It’s possible that now he's aware of both their feelings he’s no longer able to platonically hug Marinette.

Focusing on the fact that _this time_ she might not open up to him, and might instead pull away furious at him is the only way he can stop himself from showing that obviously.

“Um guys,” Nino’s voice breaks through the little oasis of calm having Marinette in his arms has created, “I don’t want to ruin your moment but class _is_ going to re-start in like a minute.”

* * *

When Mlle. Bustier’s busy writing on the board, Nino leans over, “What _was_ that?”

“I told you I liked Marinette.”

“The texts did not get across how awkward you were going to be about it.”

That’s a little upsetting coming from someone who’d defended Chat Noir’s flirting skills.

* * *

He almost expects to feel Plagg laughing at him in his bag. Then he remembers that he doesn’t have Plagg anymore, and is swamped by regret for not saying a better goodbye to his Kwami.

Maybe Marinette will let him see Plagg if she doesn’t give the ring to a new Chat Noir.

* * *

Their geography class got rapidly de-railed by Chloé and Lila getting into an argument over which of them had been to more countries.

The thing was Adrien wasn’t sure that Lila was even lying giving that her mother was a diplomat and that having to move around a lot for work _would_ make a lot of sense of a lot of what Lila was like really.

He watches poor Mlle. Bustier rapidly fall into despair.

“Why are they sitting next to each other anyway?” He asks Nino. “I didn’t think they liked each other.”

“You think _this_ is liking each other?"

“Well, no, but it’s _Chloé_ and _Lila,_ either of them could manage to get sat elsewhere if they wanted.”

Nino gave him a weird look, and Adrien realised that though Nino had heard of Lila’s so-called lying disease like the rest of the class he didn’t know the whole of it like Adrien did. “Lila’s not exactly a tantrum thrower but yeah, they have this weird frenemy thing going on now I think? You should ask Marinette, she knows more.”

He leans forward and taps Marinette on the shoulder and immediately regrets it when she startles and sends her pen flying toward the front of the class.

“Sorry!” he apologises to everyone and runs forward to get it.

His teacher spares him a glance but goes back to trying to explain to Lila and Chloé that maybe they could make a presentation or something for the class, but this wasn’t the topic they were concentrating on now.

“Thanks,” Marinette says as she takes her pen from him, “Um, what did you want?”

“Nino said you know what’s going on with Chloé and Lila?”

“I have no idea. They got into some weird one-upmanship contest about who saw their parents least,”

He should have been included in that contest. “Why wasn’t I there for that?”

“Why are all your parents so terrible?” Marinette shakes her head, “Anyway you were ill.” She makes air-quotes as she said that last word. “It was on the way back from when we went to see you that it happened, but apparently that means that they’re like this now. I” she stops as one of the girls shrieks, “think it might be good for them actually.”

He’s not sure that explains anything but on the upside he’s just managed to have a fairly coherent conversation with Marinette, _and_ he’s glad Chloé and Lila are making friends. Marinette’s right. It _should_ be good for both of them.

* * *

At the end of the day, Marinette stops in front of him, and exhales, then says, “Are you still okay to talk now?”

“Yeah it’s fine.” He says, “I told Nathalie I was going to your's after school.”

“She was ok with that?”

“Honestly I think my father’s got pretty behind with work while all this was happening so she’s glad to be able to let him work into the evening without feeling guilty about it.”

Marinette opens her mouth then shuts it.

“Were you going to say something?”

“Don’t worry about it. Anyway, that’s good because I told _my_ parents that I was inviting you. Um. Please ignore anything my dad says. He’s a bit,” she makes an awkward face, “he’s just cares for me a lot.”

“Yeah, I know. It’s really nice actually. I just hope he likes Adrien as much as he likes Chat Noir.”

“Oh right,” Marinette says, “I keep forgetting, I mean I can’t forget, that would be impossible, trust me, I don’t think my brain’s stop screaming that at me all day, but that _that time_ was _you,_ that is still just so weird to me.”

“Sorry.”

“Why should you apologise? It’s not _your_ fault. I don’t think there was a good option for you in that scenario, _I_ couldn’t think of one and I’m,”

“Usually the one of us that comes up with the plans? Yeah.”

He thought that might prompt another panicked denial but Marinette just shrugged. “Anyway _trust me_ the issue is not going to be that my dad doesn’t like Adrien as much as Chat Noir.”

* * *

“OK bye! We have work to do,” Marinette basically yanked him after her up to her room.

He almost fell to the floor when she let go of him. “OK,” he says slightly winded, “I see what you meant about him not liking me not being a problem.”

“I am so sorry,” Marinette says covering her face with her hands, “I can’t believe he tried to get you to agree to be his baking apprentice so you can inherit the shop while I’m off in the world of high fashion.”

“It’s fine really,” he tries to reassure her, “It was _nice_ really. Your parents are so affectionate. And actually that’s not a bad idea, you could take over _Gabriel_ and I could take over the bakery.”

Marinette eyes widened.

“Sorry!” He realises, “That was unfair of me. I’m sure you want to set up a company in your own name. I didn’t mean to indicate you couldn’t achieve that. You could achieve anything you wanted. Though,” he struck a pose, “If you need a model I’m generally considered pretty good.”

Marinette blinks, “I can suddenly see how you’re Chat Noir.”

He couldn’t help but wonder. “Is that a bad thing? I know you like _Adrien_ and you’re not interested in Chat Noir?”

“I wouldn’t say I’m not interested in Chat Noir.”

“But,”

“Adrien. I kissed you _back._ And I had no idea you were Adrien then Kitty.”

It felt like a door was opening to him but, “I never properly apologised for that.”

“You literally said sorry basically right away.”

“For kissing you like that. Not for doing it you when you didn’t know I was Adrien. And when I knew you liked me. Adrien me. If we didn’t know each other outside the masks it’d be different, but given we do and I knew who the other person was and you _didn’t_ that was a kind of rubbish thing to do.”

“You _knew_ I liked you?”

“At that stage I did.”

“For how long?”

He doesn’t answer that but unfortunately Marinette seems to understand his silence, “Please don’t tell me Hawk Moth told you.”

“I won’t then?”

Marinette collapses back onto her bed, “I have never been more mortified in my life. I didn’t even think I did anything much that day, but _Hawk Moth_ noticed? Urgh that is so weird, I don’t want to think that I flirted with Hawk Moth. Even accidentally.”

Adrien _really_ didn’t want to either. At _all._ At least, “I’m not sure that you did really? He does,” he corrects himself, “ _did_ have magical empathy powers. He probably felt something. And I think it was whatever went on between you, Chloé and Lila that really made him realise.”

“That’s _something._ ” She pushes herself up on her elbows, “This wasn’t even what I wanted to talk to you about.”

“It’s not?”

He’d have thought that was the important thing.

“No, actually _I_ wanted to apologise to _you_.”

“What? _Why_?”

“I shouldn’t have accused you of working with Hawk Moth.”

Guilt curdles in his gut at that because he’s not exactly _not_ working with Hawk Moth. “That’s fine. I mean I was being pretty suspicious. Trying to come up with those alternative Miraculous names wasn’t exactly my finest moment.”

She smiles, “The Starfish Miraculous _really_?”

“I panicked.”

“Seriously though, I know you twice over. I should have trusted you. You’re my partner.”

“It _is_ fine really,” he says awkwardly, “I should have trusted you with what was going on.”

He waits for her to deny being Ladybug again. 

She doesn’t.

“I don’t know if I could have been any help. You solved it, and you somehow managed to get Hawk Moth to surrender at that same time. I don’t think I could have done any better than that.”

The thing is that his instinct is to disagree with her but she’s not actually wrong per se. The only reason Hawk Moth _had_ given up was because Adrien was his son. Ladybug being involved could have only confused the situation.

“It was kind of fluke,” he admits, “It’s Plagg and Nooroo you should thank really.”

“Don’t sell yourself short Kitty.” Then she says, “Shut your eyes.”

He does, and maybe it is a little presumptuous of him that he’s hoping for a kiss, but that hope is quickly thwarted when no lips meet his, and instead he can hear Marinette moving round her room.

Then she takes his hand and puts something small and round in it.

“You can open your eyes now.” She says.

He’s holding his ring. He can’t stop the grin that splits his face, “You’re letting me say goodbye to Plagg?”

She shakes her head, and all the warmth seeps out of him until she says, “I said I should have trusted you. Well. This is me trusting you.”

“But you don’t understand,” he says, “Hawk Moth knows who I am. He’s says he’s given up, and I believe he means that, but that doesn’t mean that I want to put temptation in his way.”

Marinette face falls, “You don’t have to take it if you really don’t want to, but if you think it could be safe then I’d like you to.”

“Could we disguise it somewhat?”

“You’d have to talk to Plagg but,” she goes to her drawer and digs through it before pulling out a plain chain necklace, “Ah hah.”

“Um?”

“Here,” she says, “You can put it on this for now. It’s almost winter, you must have outfits that can hide it.”

“Ok,” he took it from her, almost unable to believe he might get to see Plagg again, “Do you think that’ll count for me to be able to see Plagg?”

“We can only try,” She says, “And if it doesn’t at least you’ll have it with you.”

“Thanks,” he hesitates, “Are you going to deny it if I end that sentence with Ladybug?”

“No,” she sighs, “I denied it before because you’re right. Hawk Moth knowing who you are _is_ a danger, but I talked to Tikki and the others last night, and I think you’re already certain enough that denying it wouldn’t actually make me any safer.”

“Thanks Ladybug then.”

“Please tell me that Hawk Moth didn’t tell you that I was Ladybug too. Though that wouldn’t make sense unless he was some weird sense of honour or something.”

“Oh don’t worry, I worked that one out myself. Honestly I’m not sure how the hell I didn’t see it earlier. Though you did trick me with that illusion. I like to think I might have worked it out earlier if not for that.”

“You beat me to it though.” She says, “I literally saw you next to a poster of you and didn’t work it out.”

“I think that’s the Miraculous magic,” he points out, “And to be fair you’re more like Ladybug than I’m like Chat Noir.”

“Adrien _you are_ Chat Noir.”

“Yeah, but, and I know this will sound stupid, Chat Noir doesn’t have to wear the masks Adrien does.”

“Adrien’s pretty fantastic,” She took his hand, “But you can be more like Chat Noir around me and the others if you want. We wouldn’t mind, or be disappointed. Though maybe tone down the flirting.”

“I only flirt with you my lady,” then he wants to kick himself for saying that, “Sorry. I should probably tamp down on that shouldn’t I? Because I wanted to say to you that I kissed you because of the circumstances but I do actually really like you. Both as Marinette and Ladybug. Even if it took me a little while to realise the former. But I know that with everything that’s happened this probably isn’t a good time, and I get it if you don’t want to you know, date me, now and if that’s the case I won’t push, but if you change your mind I’m here.”

“ _Why_ do you have to be such a good person?” Marinette’s hands went to tug at her hair. “It makes me feel like _I_ have to be a good person.”

“Um.”

“I want to date you Adrien. You cannot believe you much I want you to be my boyfriend, but you’ve just discovered your mother is dying and made the choice to close off her life support, and you’ve discovered who Hawk Moth _is,_ and what he wanted and somehow convinced him to give up. That’s _so_ much to deal with, and I think I’d be taking advantage of you if we started dating now.”

“I don’t mind you taking advantage of me.”

“Stop tempting me,” her voice went very high-pitched, “Look ask me out in like a month or something?”

A month wasn’t _that_ long. He could handle a month, “I can do that for my princess.”

At that Marinette goes even redder than she had before, and he decides to chance it and pulls her hand up to seal his promise by pressing his lips to her knuckles.

She doesn’t tell him off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Would you guys kill me if I skipped to an epilogue where Adrinette are together rather than writing their first date on-screen?


	21. Epilogue P.1

Gabriel looks over the paper before slipping it into the folder. Still he hesitates to put it on Nathalie’s desk, even though it’s a completely expected response to what she’d left on his this morning, until the sound of the car outside announces her arrival back with Adrien.

And as the voices in the foyer make him wince, Adrien’s _friends_ too. Marinette he doesn’t mind so much. She brings enough advantages to make up for her awkwardness and besides she’s not _loud._ The other two. Well, he can respect the marketing skills and chutzpah of the Ladyblogger, but if that Nino decides to ignore the _clear instructions_ Nathalie’s given him on acceptable volume levels again, he is going to be re-banned from the house, permanently this time.

That he’s a helpful hint as to where youthful street-style is going these days is something he’s _never_ going to admit to the teenager in question.

Or that he fears that Adrien has got too good at convincing him otherwise for any plan to be permanent. Honestly he’s rather proud of his son’s growing manipulative skills. It bodes well for his future. And for Marinette’s because while her _talent_ might not be any risk to her future career her soft-heartedness will be.

Of course one day that soft-heartedness will hopefully be in their favour so perhaps he shouldn’t hope that she softens up too much.

Nathalie lets herself back into the Atelier, “They’re all in Adrien’s room for now, though I’ve shown the girls the guest room we’re put aside for them to get ready in, I believe the current plan is for them to play video games until dinner, and then get ready for the party at Chloé’s after that.”

Thank goodness for that girl inheriting her parent’s pomposity. Until he’d heard she’d volunteered her father’s hotel he’d been concerned that Adrien might expect _them_ to volunteer to host one. At least this way they’re off the hook and though he’s still distrustful of the whole enterprise Adrien’s bodyguard is supposed to be accompanying Adrien there and driving them all home later.

Despite that he still can’t help but think, “Did we _have_ to agree to four of them coming over?”

“It’s their last day of collége before they go to lycée. It only happens once.”

“Yes but they’re _also_ going to have a last day of lycée aren’t they? And then,”

Nathalie puts her hand on his upper arm to stop him, “I doubt they’re going to want to do anything as reasonable as this then.”

“Please don’t remind me of that.” It’s bad enough letting Adrien have enough freedom to keep him satisfied and not keeping Chat Noir level secrets while he’s a teenager and still at school, the idea of what a technically adult Adrien might want to do gives him nightmares. “They’re not expecting me to be there at dinner are they?”

“No,” Nathalie gives him one of those little smiles of hers that have become so much more frequent over the last few months, “I think tonight they’d prefer to be left to their own devices without us looming over them. I thought we could eat together after they’d gone if you want? We’re not that busy tonight.”

As if he’d say no, and chase that smile off her face. “That’d be nice. Although I don’t know how much I’ll get done knowing they’re up there and could be doing _anything_ in the house. Are you sure you shouldn’t supervise them?”

“You want me to sit up there and watch them play video games?”

“You say that as if you don’t watch Adrien play video games.”

She rolls her eyes, “That’s different and you know it. Besides they’re too old to be watched every moment of their lives now. And you know, even if they do sneak around it’s not like there’s anything incriminating for them to find anymore is there?”

As regards Hawk Moth she’s right. Organising putting Emilie to rest the way she’d deserved with an acceptable backstory, and getting her out of the house has been difficult but they _have_ done it. That Adrien had admitted to Marinette, and then to some of the rest of the friends his version of the story had made it somewhat more rushed than he might have liked, but in retrospect he’s almost thankful for that. It wouldn’t have been right to leave her there, and it’s felt easier to breath since they finally gave her a proper grave.

And there’s nothing left in the lair or the former repository to show what they were. They still need to disentangle the Emilie’s portrait from the lift mechanism before they sell the house, but the hidden entrance only suggests a paranoia most people who know him wouldn’t be surprised by rather than Hawk Moth.

“I don’t know,” he answers unwilling to darken the mood, “There’s plenty of rather dated outfits in those wardrobes. Never mind what’s in the photo albums.”

“Adrien’s too responsible to let his friends go wandering. Especially on a night like tonight. He’s _very_ invested that everything should go right.”

“I’m aware.” He’s had to listen to Adrien’s idea for how to make this a Perfect Night for his girlfriend at dinner for the last _week or two._ On balance he’s generally glad Adrien inherited his mother’s vivacious personality sparing _him_ the need to speak, even if he lives in constant worry he’s going to say yes to something he wouldn’t want to agree with while not paying enough attention, but this time he _had_ had to remind Adrien that he should be focusing on his exams. “I barely managed to point out that Marinette probably wouldn’t want to lug a bouquet of flowers around all night, _and_ that she is going back to her own house after the party.”

Nathalie glances at the vase full of brightly coloured flowers on her own desk, “Isn’t that a little hypocritical of you?”

“ _Those_ brighten up the office.” He says as if the both of them don’t know it’s one of his attempts to make her day more pleasant, as part of the ongoing Make Nathalie Appreciate Living campaign he’s waging to various levels of success.

The idea had come to him when Adrien had announced the day he was going to ask Marinette out and had asked Nathalie to help him order flowers for to give her then.

He’s not sure it’s _quite_ the success he’d hoped they’d be but sometimes when she doesn’t know he’s looking he’s caught her looking at them with smile on her face so he’s never had it in his heart to cancel the weekly order.

* * *

He’s trying to make sense of Nathalie’s face as she surreptitiously looks through what he left on her desk, when his phone bings with a message, and he’s surprised to see it’s from Adrien, who should be quite busy getting ready for this evening. He at least knows better than most boys his age who don’t put any effort into his appearance, and besides he knows that Adrien wants to impress Marinette.

Only when he clicks into it he almost gets a heart attack because it says, “Help!”

There hasn’t been any noise from upstairs but still _anything_ could have happened and adrenaline courses through his body.

Then it’s followed by, “Are you sure we picked the right outfit?”

He wants to bash his head against the wall.

“Yes.” He sends back.

“Can you leave the Atelier and see if Marinette is around? I want to ask you but I don’t want to run into her if it’s wrong!”

“I think I might be ill,” He announces to Nathalie.

“What?” 

“I’m actually wishing someone wouldn’t ask me for fashion advice.”

“Adrien?” She asks, “I thought you and he had already picked out an outfit?”

“We had.” In truth he _might_ be being a little unfair, because it’s not as if _he’s_ never done the same before a date, but then again he’s fairly certain they’d already had this conversation. Multiple times.

His phone goes again. “Please.”

He almost asks Nathalie to go, then thinks better of it and heads out to the foyer himself. He gets his phone out to let Adrien know the coast is clear before changing his mind, and going to his son’s room.

“Your outfit is fine,” his announces as he lets himself in.

“But what if it’s too formal?” Adrien worries, “Or not formal enough? What if Marinette doesn’t like it?”

His friend is sitting awkwardly on the couch as if he’s trying to disappear.

“I rather think you’d have to wear something actually appalling to disappoint Marinette,” Adrien _is_ a perfect model, but he thinks the girl in question’s blind spot regards Adrien is rather larger than just being misled by that, “besides this goes with her outfit, so you can’t change now.”

“It does?” Adrien says, “She still won’t tell me what she’s wearing.”

“She wants you to the see the finished product. That’s completely reasonable. Anyway, do you remember your last photoshoot?”

“Yes?”

“If you feel underdressed or overdressed just channel that attitude and you’ll be fine.”

“OK.” Adrien says. “I can do that.” 

* * *

“How was it?” Nathalie asks when he re-enters the Atelier.

“Excruciating but I think he’s calmed down now.”

Then they’re interrupted by a knock at the door.

Nathalie looks at him.

Since he’s right there he opens it hoping that Adrien hasn’t somehow had another fit of nerves. Thankfully it’s Marinette.

Unfortunately she _also_ seems to be in a panic.

Really he doesn’t know why _anyone_ would come to him for comfort. The closest he’s ever come to comforting people is offering to akumatise them. Though honestly he’s still not convinced some of them weren’t glad of it.

Besides he doesn’t even think Marinette likes him. Even if she _does_ respect his opinion on fashion and the company he’s built and is ready to take all the advice she can about the industry. Honestly he respects that.

“You know how I was unsure about the seam closure?” Marinette asks, “I think I made the wrong choice.”

“Twirl,” he commands, and she does, and he watches the skirt.

“Only you can tell if you made the right choice but no-one’s going to tell you it’s wrong,” he tells her, “ _I_ can’t.”

“Really?”

“Really.” He says. “You’re good at this. Just have confidence.” Then,turning towards her desk he asks, ”Nathalie?”

She looks up from her computer even though he’s fairly certain that she’s been watching this whole interplay.

“Do you have the handbag?”

“And the headband, yes.”

She reaches out under the desk, and gets the boxes out and stands up to give them to Marinette.

“These are for me,” the girl asks with her eyes wide looking at the _Gabriel_ boxes.

“I figured you needed some accessories,” he’s getting _something_ out of this even if she’s wearing her own dress, “Now remember to make sure Adrien takes lots of photos for his Instagram.”

* * *

Nathalie stands by his side as they watch the car pull out, and he wraps his arm around her waist to support her. He hates that much as she’d stopped using the brooch before she endangered her life it has taken a permanent toll on her health, and he does try and help with that where he can.

She silently acquiesces to his offer, and provides no objection when he pulls her against him, and then rests her head against his shoulder.

“They’re happy aren’t they?” He asks her.

“They are” She agrees.

“I’m glad,” he says and he is because there’s been so many times when despite Adrien’s reassurances he’s wondered if he really did do the right thing. Whether Adrien _could_ truly be happy without his mother.

But he thinks Adrien is now.

Somehow it’s not impossible to believe that anymore. To believe that Adrien _can_ be happy without Emilie. To believe that _he_ can be.

“They seem so,” Nathalie trails off.

“Young?” He suggests, and that’s another slightly uncomfortable thing because they _are_ young, and they could have been like this all of the time if it hadn’t been for Hawk Moth.

“Yes. I don’t know that I _ever_ remember being that young.”

“Me neither.” The closest he can think of is youthful excitement and giddiness of those early days with Emilie when he’d been making his name but even then he’d been much older than Adrien is now.

“You still need to review his summer timetable you know.”

“I know.” He agrees, “But you know if we manage to get the move through during the summer holidays it’ll need adjustment.”

He’s not _running_ from what he’s done. It’s just he thinks a fresh start will do them all some good. And if somewhere slightly smaller helps make sure Adrien knows they’re _not_ available to host parties like the Bourgeois’ are tonight then that’s only an upside.

“You haven’t even chosen a house yet. If we wait until he’s enrolled in lycée then at least you won’t have worry about staying in the right catchment area.”

“Ah, well about that.”

She looks up at him, and when her eyes meet his it’s not so hard to remember what it’s like to be in the first sprouts of love after all, except it’s no longer an excited giddiness but a more mature comfort that he feels when he loses himself in her gaze.

He forces himself to focus, “I was hoping that was a decision we could make together.”

“Oh,” She says, “Is that why I found an example of the reference you’d provide, as well as a number of positions inside the company, and a, I must say, _much_ smaller list of ones outside it on my desk today?”

The thing _is_ much as he understands letting Nathalie have a life outside him is a fair trade for having her he doesn’t like the idea of her being someone else’s assistant and looking after them. Hopefully she’s choose one of the administrative roles inside the company.

“I thought it was a reasonable response to you leaving a copy of the company policies on romantic relationships on mine. Though on reading that through I thought it was very interesting to note that there’s nothing actually _stopping_ me from kissing you right now.”

“That was my reading of it too.”

“So, can I take that to mean you _wouldn’t_ be opposed if I kissed you right now?”

“I think at this stage we’re basically dating without the advantages,” She gives a short laugh, and looks down, “So _yes,_ you can kiss me.”

He has to tip her face back up, but there’s nothing on her face to show she’s second-guessing anything so he doesn’t hesitate to close the gap between them.

She shifts a little in his hold when their lips touch, but he realises it’s just to get a better angle as her far hand reaches up over his shoulder to press them closer together.

Maybe he’ll text Gorilla _not_ to bring Adrien home as early as possible after all.


	22. Epilogue p.2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK this is only a little short chapter to tidy a few more things up

Plagg and Tikki emerge from their hiding places immediately once Alya and Nino leave the car on their way home after the party.

It’s funny. That knowing who each other was would mean they and their Kwami’s could spend time together _openly_ wasn’t something he’d ever really thought of in all that time he’d dreamed of Ladybug unmasking herself to him but now he wonders how he _didn’t._

It’s a pity they still have to hide in front of other people but at least the four of them can be themselves together.

He thinks Plagg’s glad too, even if Adrien is deeply suspicious that their kwamis had been spending time together while he and Marinette had been at school unaware.

Talking of Marinette he’s totally transfixed as she gets out food for both their kwami’s from her clutch bag.

“You’re so beautiful.” He says, and only realises that he’s said it out loud a moment too late, but he doesn’t care because it’s true and she deserves to hear it.

She blushes. “You’re always saying that.”

“Because it’s true, but it’s _especially_ true in that dress. I can’t believe you sewed it all yourself.”

“Honestly neither can I. I thought I was never going to get it done for tonight.”

“You’re _always_ saying that, and you always manage it.”

“Hey you know timetabling things isn’t my strong point.”

“That’s what you have _me_ for.” Adrien points out. “I’m very organised.”

Marinette laughs, “No you’re not, _Nathalie_ is. You and your father just go where you’re told to.”

“OK, I’m not going to argue with that, but,” then he reconsiders, “OK, maybe I’m not that easy for her either.”

Mostly because of the running off to be Chat Noir but that was _much_ less frequent these days given there was no Hawk Moth. He wonders if his father ever gives thanks that he’d given up before Adrien started lycée when the danger to his education would have been more formidable.

Not that Chat Noir _never_ made an appearance these days. The odd threat did occur which needed him and Marinette to intervene, but neither his father nor Nathalie had said anything along the lines of him having to stop after his first re-appearance as the hero.

Though he _had_ suddenly had an increased amount of fencing and self-defence lessons scheduled.

“I still can’t believe your dad let me have the fabric for the dress,” Marinette says, “Especially after I told him that he’d risked you turning into Chloé or Lila with how he’d neglected you.”

His father had said that was ridiculous. Not because she was wrong about him ignoring Adrien but because clearly Adrien was a much better person that either of those girls. At that Marinette had fervently agreed.

“My father actually _likes_ you.” He explains, “I know he doesn’t exactly show it,”

“No,” she says, “I’d say the fabric, and the dress, _and,_ the headband were showing it pretty clearly. And I think a lot of how he is to me is kind of supposed to be encouragement in his own weird way.”

“Yeah, it is.” Sometimes when he saw how his father was with Marinette he wondered if _his_ relationship with his father would have been easier if he was someone more like Marinette.

He’d asked Nathalie once if the fact that he didn’t have any real interest in fashion himself was a disappointment to his father, but she’d disagreed vehemently on the point, and she must have said s _omething_ to his father because when they’d been watching one of his mother’s old films together the next night he’d very awkwardly said to Adrien that there was nothing he would change about him, and that his mother would agree on that.

She wasn’t _not_ still a sore point to his father exactly but ever since they’d laid her to rest he’d become more and more willing to talk about her to Adrien.

Neither of them might ever know for sure why she’d used the Peacock Miraculous to her death but together they were at least both able to accept that, and Adrien knew that they’d both made the right choice not to use the Wish to undo that.

His girlfriend twinkles under the streetlights the car is passing under due to the subtle shimmer in her dress and the crystals in her headband and he knows that he’d never do anything to risk this or the progress his family has made.

The car slows down, as they approach the bakery and thankful for the privacy screen he learns over to kiss her again. It’s awkward with the seatbelt trying to restrain him but he can’t care, and from her eager reciprocation never does Marinette.

He only realises they’ve come to a stop when Gorilla bangs on the door startling them apart. He isn’t sure why Marinette blushes at things like this now when she should be used to it by this stage but it _is_ still very cute.

“Good night,” he says, even though he wishes he could go with her. He knows his father would never countenance letting him have a sleepover with his girlfriend but from what he’s heard from his friends and classmates apparently that’s a fairly normal thing and not just his father being his father.

“Good night,” Marinette says, pressing a quick kiss to his lips before she moves and grabs her bag and gets out of the car.

“You’re so soppy” Plagg says as Adrien continues to stare at Marinette’s empty seat.

“That’s rich coming from you, as if you weren’t encouraging me to go after her from the first moment either of us showed interest in each other.”

“Live as long as I have and watching humans pine for one another gets boring. Besides her parents have good cheese. It was purely self-interested.”

“Yeah, yeah, keep saying that. I know you. You’re a big softy at heart.”

“Who _me?_ Are you sure you’re not mistaking me with Duusu? You know the hyperactive one?”

“I do know my own Kwami. If _you_ suddenly became hyperactive I’d think _you’d_ been body-swapped.”

Plagg made a face, “Don’t even make me think of it. Can you imagine being stuck in a body that didn’t like the taste of cheese?”

“Yes.” Adrien says given that his neutral feelings on said dairy product have been taking a continued drop at the amount he has to store and see and smell every day for Plagg’s sake.

“Does your father not like cheese? I knew there was something wrong with that man.”

“You know _exactly_ what was wrong with him. And he likes cheese plenty.”

Plagg takes the implication, “Sometimes you do disappoint me.”

“You know, I don’t know if I ever probably thanked you for what you did.” In that first reunion with Plagg he’d been delighted with so many things that he’d said something but, it means more to him now that they’re got to a stage where things are basically functional, and his father is finally properly moving on, “I don’t know where I’d be, where _we’d_ all be if you hadn’t done what you’d done.”

“I just took a chance when I saw it kid. You’d have won anyway, Tikki & I both believe that.”

“I wouldn’t have ended up like this though,” Adrien sighs, “So _seriously_ thank you.”

Plagg grins but all he says is “Stop being so mushy kid.”

Adrien ignored his bluster, and with the slight guilt growing in him felt quite comfortable appealing to the better nature he knew his kwami tried to hide, “Do you think Nooroo knows? How your gamble turned out?”

“Oh he knows. Don’t worry. We Kwamis in the Miracle Box can communicate and Tikki keeps them all pretty updated.”

“That’s a relief but,”

“I think it’s your girlfriend you need to ask if you want to thank him.”

“I _do._ And I will, but, do you think he’d want to talk to my father? I know he was the absolute worst as a holder but,”

“Do you think he’d apologise?” Plagg interrupts.

“I don’t know,” Adrien admits. He knew his father _did_ think he’d made a mistake now, and that he _did_ regret it, but whether he regretted anything he’d done to other people he’s not quite sure.

“Do you think he’d thank him?”

Adrien thought over how things were now, and how their relationship was slowly healing and how they talked and, “Yeah. I think he would.”

* * *

As he and Gorilla gets out of the car he notices there don’t seem to be any lights on, “Huh, that’s weird,” he says to his bodyguard.

He’d have expected his father to be up and waiting for him ready to interrogate him about the party but when they enter the foyer the lights flicker on as the sensors recognise their presence and there’s no sign of his father. 

“Do you think he and Nathalie have both gone to bed?” he asks Gorilla and receives a nod in return.

“Oh right,” he realises, “Did one of them text you?”

That gains him another nod.

Surprised at his luck, especially since while Nathalie isn’t at all, his father _is_ a total night owl usually, he shrugs, “I guess I won’t go looking for him then.”

 _That_ gets him a frantic nod, and he almost trips on his way over to the stairs, as he realises what Gorilla isn’t saying. “Wait. _Seriously?_ ”

Gorilla shrugs which he interprets as that whichever of them had texted him they hadn’t exactly sent that but that the implication was there.

Either that or he’s just seen the two of them get even closer recently the same way Adrien has is making a sensible guess.

Either way Adrien’s not going to think too hard about it.

He can ask his father if they’re officially together now tomorrow.

It’s about time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> But hey, if the ideas hit I might add a few more scenes in this 'verse at some point. Maybe.

**Author's Note:**

> Throwing this up in the hope it makes me finish it.


End file.
